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February 27, 2010

Abyss-Mania is running wild on TNA Impact

It’s one thing for TNA to be rehashing WCW story lines from 1997 and 1998 – at least WCW was on fire at that point – but now it appears that TNA is stealing a page from WCW’s not-so-glorious 1994 playbook.

Back then, a big, strong, child-like wrestler named Dave Sullivan gained confidence after Hulk Hogan presented him with a pair of his wrestling boots, which were referred to as “magic slippers.” Fast-forward to TNA 2010: A big, strong, child-like wrestler named Abyss has gained confidence (and superhuman strength) after Hogan presented him with his Hall of Fame ring. Abyss even comes to the ring to Hogan’s WCW theme music from ’94.

On Thursday night’s episode of TNA Impact, Abyss used the magical powers of the ring to break free from handcuffs and save Hogan from an attack by A.J. Styles, Ric Flair and Desmond Wolfe. This led to the announcement that Hogan and Abyss will face Flair and Styles in the Impact main event on March 8, when TNA makes its permanent move to Monday nights.

The Hogan-Abyss story line is a little too cartoon-like for my tastes, but if it succeeds in getting Abyss over as a bigger star than he is now, more power to the TNA creative team. I suppose a magic ring is no more nonsensical than a wrestler who has supernatural powers or a leprechaun who lives under the wrestling ring.

Other thoughts on Thursday’s show:

It was hilarious watching Styles, Flair and Wolfe take turns running into Hogan’s fist. It was reminiscent of the Four Horsemen running into Dusty Rhodes’ elbow back in the day. Right after Taz remarked how good Hogan looked in the ring, “The Hulkster” took a couple steps and limped badly. …

If you’re a Wolfe fan (I am), there was good news and bad news. The good news is that Wolfe was involved in the big post-match angle with Hogan, Flair, Styles and Abyss. The bad news is that prior to the angle, Wolfe was pinned clean by Abyss in less than two minutes. I wouldn’t have as much of a problem with Wolfe losing to Abyss if it had been a longer, more competitive match, but the way this went down was absurd. TNA had done a tremendous job of establishing Wolfe as a major player right from the start, but the new regime has dropped the ball. …

Flair showed a lot of intensity – and that’s probably an understatement – in the show-opening promo. I don’t know if Flair could have been sweating any more if he were sitting in a sauna wearing a fur coat. It would be nice, though, if Flair got the name right of the guy TNA is trying to push as a super babyface. It’s Abyss, not “The Abyss,” which Flair said at least three times. …

I don’t think anyone has ever played an insincere wrestling character as well as Eric Bischoff. His scenes with Jeff Jarrett were really good. It was quite a sight to see the TNA founder wearing a hairnet and flipping burgers. …

I still can’t get over the fact that TNA is putting over the WWE Hall of Fame as the ultimate achievement in the business. I also wish Bischoff would stop talking about “turning the company around.” That implies that TNA was garbage before he and Hogan arrived to save it. It would be better to put a positive spin on it and say something such as “taking the company to the next level.” …

While talking with someone on the phone, Bischoff remarked that having celebrity guest hosts is “the dumbest idea I’ve ever heard.” Really? Dumber than paying a large sum of money to the rock band Kiss and creating The Demon character? Dumber than bringing in Master P and the No Limit Soldiers? …

I liked the bit in which Mr. Anderson was cutting a promo on the ramp and Kurt Angle came up through the floor behind him. Anderson heard the crowd react when he mentioned Angle’s name and said, “Don’t worry, he’s not here.” Angle then blasted him with a chair. …

It was pretty unrealistic that one chair shot by Angle onto Anderson’s back would KO Anderson to the point that Rob Terry could pick up his lifeless body, carry him to the ring and pin him. …

I’m not sure what Anderson was going for with the reference to the Vietnamese soldier during his promo. …

I like Eric Young, but when he wears that black leather jacket and white T-shirt and stands next to Kevin Nash, he reminds me of one of the dorky guys from "Grease" that were Danny Zuko and Kenickie’s underlings. …

Young and Sean Waltman had a decent-looking brawl in the parking lot, but did I really see Scott Hall use a chop to the chest in a street fight? It’s interesting that we didn’t actually see Hall hit Nash in the knee with the lead pipe – we only saw the results of it. It still wouldn’t surprise me if Nash is working with his buddies to set up Young. …

After Samoa Joe was kidnapped by three masked men last week, the only follow-up on this show was Taz saying that he had been trying unsuccessfully all week to contact Joe. Perhaps someone should alert the police. …

It was shocking to see ODB being used as the sacrificial lamb to get Daffney over, but I think it’s great that Daffney is being pushed as a dangerous threat to the women’s title. ODB, who did a heel turn not all that long ago, came across as a babyface in this match. You can’t make this stuff up. …

The best match on a show that had very little wrestling was the one between Kazarian and Brian Kendrick. Kazarian won with the Flux Capicator. That’s a spectacular finishing move, but TNA didn’t even bother to show one replay. Instead, they cut right to Young and Nash taping up in the back. …

Taz said that Kazarian doesn’t show any ring rust. That was cute. …

Since Team 3D defeated The Nasty Boys in a tables match, I would love to believe the program between the two teams is over, but I don’t think that’s case. Jerry Sags doesn’t look too bad in the ring, but Brian Knobs is a total embarrassment. …

Beer Money was on TV for the second straight week, so things are looking up – well, at least for them. If you’re The Motor City Machine Guns or Generation Me, not so much. When Matt Morgan took issue with Hernandez for setting up a tag team title defense for them against Beer Money, Morgan said he would have preferred they defended the title against a team such as the Guns or Generation Me before working their way up to Beer Money. Ouch. ...

I must have been dreaming, because I swear I saw Jay Lethal make an appearance on the show.

Posted by Kevin Eck at 2:42 PM | | Comments (38)
        

Comments

Bischoff is right. The guest host is the worst idea in wrestling history and that's saying something. I haven't been able to get past more than 15 mins of Raw before turning it off since they started that crap what, a year ago?

RESPONSE FROM KE: What is the definition of a bad idea? The Raw ratings have shown a slight increase since the guest hosts started. That sounds like a good idea to me.

I hate the Raw guest hosts, but this is professional wrestling we're talking about - this is far from the "worst idea" in wrestling history. David Arquette, Shockmaster, Fingerpoke of Doom, Doink the Clown and all those midgets, Hornswaggle in DX, the White Castle of Fear promo, the list is endless. Something as inconsequential as guest hosts doesn't even warrant consideration.

Apparently I inadvertently skipped over the five matches that were on the 2 hour show by fast-forwarding at X2 speed.
Great to hear Ho'-gan is re-entering the ring tho, only a month after he said he has no business being in the ring anymore. You can only imagine my excitement of the thought of seeing him "perform" with a 61 year old.
To quote The Great Eck: "You can’t make this stuff up. …"

I would say the worst idea ever was pushing a character named Glacier whose entrance was 30 times longer than any match he ever took part in and who never did one wrestling move and yet was undefeated for almost as long as Goldberg. That and Tank Abbott singing with 3 Count.

Not sure how you can say Sags looked ok. He didn't even run once, didn't know how to take an eye rake or deliver one, and when he had to throw someone into the ropes he grabbed their hand and let them run.

RESPONSE FROM KE: Ok, let me rephrase. Compared to Knobs, Sags didn't look too bad.

Unfortunately the fear I and many others have had since Hogan and Flair showed up looks like it's turning into a reality:

They're getting back in the ring for a match.

I know they did this already not too long ago in Australia but that's not on national TV in the US. It's also part of a tag match so it might be able to help hide how old and unable to wrestle they are (especially in Hogan's case), so hopefully their actual time in the ring is brief.

I wouldn't want to see one of them have a heart attack on live TV, after all.

Speaking of which, I guess TNA is hoping the angle of a match including Hogan and Flair will be a ratings grabber for them, but they'd better come strong with the rest of their show. That's where they've got the best chance of making progress, not by having two guys around 60 years old wrestle.

Telling a story where the ring actually has magic powers that make Abyss stronger and braver IS kind of hokey, but I'm not completely sure that's what they're doing. It could be that Abyss just feels more confident because he believes Hogan gave him something magical, and that's what's made the difference.

RESPONSE FROM KE: Yes, it's possible that the story is that Abyss believes the ring has powers and therefore that belief gives him the confidence to do great things. But even so, him being able to break handcuffs because he believes in a ring is pretty silly.

The Raw ratings have shown a slight increase since the guest hosts started. That sounds like a good idea to me

Their rating this past week was pretty nice-3.8

I kind of liked the "The Abyss" thing from Flair. Even though it probably was a rare lapse in professional judgement for the Naitch, it sort of makes Abyss sound mysterious.

Flair better be carefully with the greenies. He is getting older.

AJ Styles is really starting to sound a lot like a young Flair. I am curious to see if this can get over with a new generation of fans. Of course if Flair and AJ catch on, we all know Hogan and Bischoff will bury them.

The Master Bates and the Kiss Demon story lines were only two in a long history of Bad Bischoff Ideas. Super The Abyss is a Great Original Idea compared to those two ideas from the Wannabe Imbecile.

Of course Bischoff and Chump Hogan are using the term, "turning the company around." In their world, no body gets credit for anything that is a positive with the new administration. Sounds sort of like President Obama, dontcha think?

Go back to 1985 when a big, strong, childlike wrestler named Hillbilly Jim saved Hogan from an attack, I believe. He, too, was rewarded with a pair of "magic slippers" and trained by the Immoral, oops, Immortal One.........maybe this will be a success?? Wait, it's TNA.....

It looked to me that Wolfe is the second member of a coming resurrection of the Horsemen faction. Flair as JJ. AJ as Ric and Desmond Wolfe as the second banana singles guy (Tully, Luger, etc.) Now the tag team guys will be who? My guess is Matt Morgan and maybe Tomko?

I can't wait to see The Tower of Doom II: Hogan and Abyss take on the New Alliance, followed by a tractor pull between Hogan and Awesome Kong. That will definitely turn the company around.

I totally agree with Kevin re: bad ideas. The guest host thing at least works on paper. Some of Bischoff and Russo's booking ideas (and McMahon's) have been unbelievably awful. Katie Vick?

Sorry, Eric Bischoff--I'd have to say that booking Orlando Jordan to beat Pope and Samoa Joe, and hiring Bubba the Love Sponge, who absolutely SUCKED are both way worse ideas than the "guest host".

That's how jaded we are as wrestling fans. Nowadays, getting clocked in the back of the head with a steel folding chair and getting knocked out fromi t is UNrealistic!

For all Hogan did for Dave Sullivan, he still couldn't find a way to overcome Dave's crippling dyslexia.

Now that we're suck in mid-90s WCW, how long until we see Brutus Beefcake? Or, the Butcher, the Zodiac, the Man With No Name, etc...

Abyss is no Dave Sullivan.

Another abysmal show. And to think I was excited about the new TNA regime, hoping that things would improve. It's gotten way worse. In fact, this is worse than WCW ever got in my opinion. Yep, Bischoff and Hogan seal the fate of yet another wrestling company. Congrats boys.

I'll try to look at the few bright points as usual: I'm digging this Angle/Anderson feud. AJ, Wolfe, and Flair are great together. OK. I ran out of things. One more thing: Flair wrestling after that grand WWE sendoff is a disgrace. His reputation has taken yet another big hit.

Abyss even comes to the ring to Hogan’s WCW theme music from ’94.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Doesn't WWE own the copyrights to that theme song?

TNA needs to install some of the moving floors that the Southwest wing in BWI has in the Impact Zone so Hogan can get to the ring faster.

"It was shocking to see ODB being used as the sacrificial lamb to get Daffney over, but I think it’s great that Daffney is being pushed as a dangerous threat to the women’s title. ODB, who did a heel turn not all that long ago, came across as a babyface in this match. You can’t make this stuff up. …"

Sure you can your name just has to be Vince Russo and your head has to be firmly planted up your ....

" if Flair got the name right of the guy TNA is trying to push as a super babyface. It’s Abyss, not “The Abyss,” which Flair said at least three times. …"

Kev, maybe Flair sees that TNA is going down the WCW path and will eventually turn into "The Abyss"

All I can say is that Impact was a very entertaining show on Thursday. I think that they have the right combination of starpower and newbies to give Vince a run for the money.

Kevin, what ever happened to Booker? He would fit perfect into this whole scene.

RESPONSE FROM KE: His contract wasn't renewed.

Since Hogan's 1994 music was from his 1994 days, isn't it property of WCW? And since WCW was bought by Vince, wouldn't he own the music? I know Jimmy Hart was involved in the music creation in companies he has been in, so maybe he and Hogan trademarked it to themselves.

I thought there was a nice dynamic between Flair, Styles and Wolfe during their beatdown of Abyss. I think a stable of Styles, Wolfe and perhaps Beer Money would make a phenomenal stable with Flair in the JJ Dillon role.

Another thought; convert the TNA Global Championship into the TNA Television Championship. When the NWA had a TV champ (especially in the mid-80's), it typically featured a prominent star (either Blanchard, Rhodes or Anderson held the title between '84-87). TNA could do the same with some of their talent (Wolfe, Matt Morgan, Daniels, etc) and also give the "Global" championship a logical reason for existence.

What I am dissapointed most about is Ric Flair coming out of retirement to wrestle. It was one thing to do it in Australia where no on saw (on TV or live, from what I hear about the attendances). But to do it in the US, on national TV, after that amazing sendoff that WWE gave me two years ago is a slap in the face to all the fans who became so emotionally invested in that storyline. I'm a 28 year old man and even I was tearing up while at Wrestlemania XXIV after he lost his match against Shawn Michaels. Now I'm just angry.

Sounds like the beginning of a new 4 Horseman stable. Styles, Wolfe, Flair, and ???
I say Matt Morgan or Samoa Joe.

All those "dumbest ideas" are stupid. It shows they were/are having trouble growing the fan base through the traditional means; wrestlers and wrestling. Fact is both companies are lacking in a few talents who can naturally draw in fans. It is more noticeable in the WWE since they are an established brand on a larger network.

TNA is heading south fast. If Flair would head over to the Knockout division and compete for the belt, they might have a chance. With all his domestic issues the past few years, you would think it would be a natural move. Bring up how all these arrests and fights with the wives, family, etc are just a training ground to wear the gold of a belt he has never worn.

That may have been the worst Impact ever. One site reported that there were 12 minutes of wrestling. If that's the case, then that's the case, but giving us scene after scene of Abyss and Hulk or Bischoff and Jarrett just doesn't cut it.

I didn't get the feeling that the ring was supposed to come across as magical, just a symbol to rally Abyss.

Wolfe, Styles, Flair (as manager/spokesman)...new horsemen. Just add Robert Roode and James Storm...

The Hogan to TNA effort hasn't worked out since their ratings in the US have gone back to their old poor levels. Good thing WWE NXT was so good or there wouldn't be any "sports entertainment" worth watching on TV.

Nothing wrong with leather jackets and white t-shirts. The greaser look still holds up. Stray cat strut...

Ok here's the deal with TNA...it isn't wrestling as much as it is a bad soap opera. If you watched the show (thank goodness for FF on DVR), there was FIVE matches for a total of 14 minutes!!! That's it!!! One I wouldn't really even call a match.
It should be WNA for "wrestling not allowed". I realize that they are trying to develop stories, but shouldn't the wrestlers actually wrestle? Take the spotlight out of the back, and put it where it belongs...the ring.
On the note of action in the ring, the Nasty Boys are just plain, well, nasty (and not in a good way). I don't think they could even run enough to flop off of Hogan's fist. BTW Kev, loved the 4 Horseman reference. Those were the days of wrastlin'.

When Hogan came to TNA, i knew he would wrestle eventually, When i heard he was teaming with Abyss, i thought" hmm, Abyss is like a monster-type, Bundy,Kamala,Andre, ,Studd etc, that Hogan thrived off of in the 1980's.. Am i the only one who thinks Abyss will turn on Hogan, setting up Hogan/Abyss on PPV, it would be like the Orndorff/Andre/Sid( twice) on Hogan, except not as good.. any thoughts anyone?

RESPONSE FROM KE: The thought that Hogan is building up Abyss to have a program with him down the line definitely crossed my mind.

is it me or did i hear hogan call a.j. styles "joey styles"?

Bad Idea like Putting the world title on David Arquette?

I hope this is the start of a strong heel turn for Matt Morgan. All of the elements are there: beat tag partner in the tournament; discuss the Hernandez title match offer with a little disgust in his voice. The only thing left is for Beer Money to take the titles by pinning Super Mex whereby Morgan helps him up and then clothes lines him starting a program where Super Mex plays the Dusty Rhodes role and Morgan plays the Superstar Billy Graham role. I hope it happens because 7-fooers shouldn't be faces!

Maybe I didn't watch enough Mr. Kennedy in WWE, because Mr. Anderson has turned out to be really really annoying.

I love TNA's wrestling, and wish there was more of it. I also love the character Bischof has created, and if used properly, he could bring the heat to the ring for a long time.

However, the booking has been dreadful since Hogan showed up. I tried to be positive about this, but TNA's direction wreaks of WCW all over again.

I still can't get over it was only months ago Angle was doing jobs to Wolf. And, now Wolf is jobbing to Abyss? That really irritates me.

One Ring to rule them all, One Ring to find them,
One Ring to bring them all and in the darkness bind them
In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie.

Now we just need some Hobbits to carry the ring for Abyss.

One thing's for sure. There are 3X as many comments in your TNA blog now that The Huckster is there. TNA is drawing interest but to me it seems like the car wreck type interest.
I always thought Bischoff was a terrible promoter. I too Kev am sick of his talk about the wrestling business. Actions speak louder than words. Prove it Eric. It's just hot air right now.

I cant wait until March 8, to see the 2 greatest stars of all time (Hogan and Flair) come out of retirement and make their TNA debeut. Vince vs. Cena will good on my dvr because il be watching TNA live

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About Kevin Eck
The Baltimore Sun's Kevin Eck blogs about professional wrestling.
E-mail Kevin.
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