TNA falls back into bad habits on Impact
TNA Impact came off like a parody of itself on Thursday’s episode. All of the worst elements of TNA were accounted for: pole matches; naïve and inept babyfaces; tired swerves; and bad comedy.
Every time TNA strings together some good episodes and I think the company has turned a corner, it quickly regresses. This sub-par episode of Impact came on the heels of last Sunday’s poorly received Victory Road pay-per-view.
The most absurd thing about Thursday’s show was that there was yet another pole match. This time it was Office Keys on a Pole. You see, Kurt Angle somehow got the keys to Mick Foley’s office and he booked a match – more on how he had the ability to book a match later – between him and Foley, with the winner getting the office and apparently the stroke that comes along with it.
Foley underscored how ridiculous it is to have two big stars fighting for power in such a gimmicky match by making wisecracks about it throughout the show.
In addition to its fetish for poles, the TNA creative team also seems to get off on burying the babyfaces. The good guys had a very bad night at Victory Road, which they acknowledged as they vowed to turns things around. Instead, they were duped and defeated.
Eric Young, who has been a heel for a couple months now, convinced Foley that he had seen the error of his ways. Foley bought it and made Young the fifth member of the TNA Originals – A.J. Styles, Beer Money and Daniels – in their 10-man tag match against The British Invasion, Sheik Abdul Bashir and Kiyoshi. Everyone could see it coming from a mile away that Young was going to turn on his teammates – everyone but Foley and the TNA Originals, that is.
Other thoughts on Thursday’s show:
Speaking of “swerves” that were so obvious that they weren’t worth doing, Bobby Lashley made a dramatic entrance at the end of the show during the Main Event Mafia’s beat-down of Mick Foley. The MEM looked happy to see him, thinking he was on their side. The fact that Lashley was slapping hands with the fans should have clued them in that he was a babyface – then again, in TNA, the heels are the babyfaces. I guess the heels in TNA are just as clueless as their counterparts. Anyway, Angle gave the thumbs up, thumbs down gesture – Triple H and Batista should call gimmick infringement on that one – and Lashley acted like he was going to hit Foley and then – surprise! – he attacked the MEM. …
Taz cut a promo explaining why he became Samoa Joe’s adviser. Even though Joe is supposed to be a turncoat heel, it was a total babyface promo and the fans cheered throughout. Taz said that Joe reminded him of himself. Is that supposed to be a compliment? He also said that he was going to teach Joe about winning championships. Um, isn’t Joe a former TNA world champion? And if it’s all about titles, why did Taz advise Joe to hand the belt to Angle at Slammiversary? …
The first words out of Taz’s mouth were about him working for “a little company known as ECW.” Enough already with that. The original ECW has been dead and buried for nearly a decade. Yes, it was innovative at the time and both WWE and WCW stole its concepts, but ultimately the bingo hall company failed. And it would have failed much sooner than it did had Vince McMahon not been covertly funding it. …
I noticed that Taz dropped one of the z’s from his name, but it appears that he gained an l, b and s. …
Angle said that he has control of TNA now because he convinced the board of directors that it was the best thing for the company. TNA has a board of directors? So let me get this straight: TNA now has four authority figures – Angle, executive shareholder Foley, founder Jeff Jarrett and management director Jim Cornette. Speaking of Cornette, does he still have an on-air role at this point? …
Is TNA hoping that if it refers to Angle being a 13-time world champion enough that it will be true? By my count, he’s at 10. …
Samoa Joe wasn’t the brightest guy as a babyface, and his heel turn doesn’t seem to have made him any smarter. For some reason, he hit the referee during his X Division title shot against Homicide. Then he acted surprised when he was disqualified, thinking the referee had called for the bell because Homicide had submitted. …
It looks as if LAX is splitting up and Hernandez is going to get a big babyface push. I always liked LAX, but it’s probably better at this point for Homicide and Hernandez to go their separate ways. Hernandez could end up becoming a breakout star – if he’s given the opportunity. …
The high point of the show for me was when Rocco and Sally Boy appeared to be on the verge of upsetting Scott Steiner and Booker T. for the TNA tag team title. The crowd at the Impact Zone was going crazy when Rocco hit a big splash off the top rope onto Steiner for a near fall. I think Rocco could get over in a mid-card role. …
A women’s battle royal was held with the winner guaranteed a spot in the MEM. What if a babyface won and didn’t want to join them? As it turns out, it was another swerve. Traci Brooks, who was the referee for the battle royal, ended up winning after she tossed both Awesome Kong and Tara out. Before the match, Brooks said that she had been working on some projects in Hollywood. Insert your own joke here. …
Hey look, Sharmell and Jenna Morasca are co-existing in the MEM. What then exactly was the point of their feud and horrific pay-per-view match? …
Cody Deaner gives Cryme Tyme and Abraham Washington a run for their money as the most annoying act in wrestling.
Comments
deaner does not desearve to lumped in with cryme time jesus, at least you could appriciate his sweet taste in t-shirts
Posted by: ultimate_krang | July 24, 2009 8:39 PM
I have to say that I enjoyed the show and TNA actually surprised me with the X division match. I thought for sure that Joe was going to win the X division title and give MEM all of the titles. Even after Joe hit the referee, I thought that it was going to be something strange that caused Joe to win the title.
For awhile, I have thought that Hernandez was the next Stone-Cold if used correctly. I am glad that he is back and being pushed.
I don't get what Traci will do in the MEM. The brewing battle between Kong and Tara will be very interesting.
Since, I never saw the old ECW, I have no idea about Taz's rep as a former wrestler. Kev, I agree with you, the old ECW concept failed and talking about it as if it were WCW or WWE is ridiculous.
Posted by: Jay | July 24, 2009 9:11 PM
I'm glad to see that you also think iMPACT sucked last night..that was horrid. I don't know what they think when they have the heels be all dominant..it's eerily reminiscent of WCW
Posted by: Hank | July 24, 2009 9:27 PM
I must have missed the week that TNA fell into good habits.
Posted by: Elevation | July 24, 2009 10:31 PM
Indeed ,welcome back Tracy Brooks .
Alas , Kevin , she too , just as Taz , seems to have added a few L B S . Can't wait to see one of her "projects" .
Seriously Kev , I have long thought that Hernandez would fair much better wrestling singles . He's a diamond in the rough .
Posted by: the artist formerly known as jack in hebron | July 24, 2009 11:23 PM
Kurt Angle:
To be honest, that's only 10 if you count his Amateur wrestling world title, in Pro Wrestling, hes only a 9 time world champion
RESPONSE FROM KE: Technically, you are right. Here is the official breakdown of Angle's world titles: WWE (4), world heavyweight (1), WCW (1), TNA (3).
I had him at 10 because he won the TNA title in May 2007 but was then stripped of the title by Jim Cornette. I was counting that as another reign, but, officially, TNA does not.
Posted by: Tyler M | July 25, 2009 12:34 AM
Taz had one z in his name during his days in ECW. It was only when he joined the WWE that the second z was
added.
RESPONSE FROM KE: Yes, I know. He's been Tazz for the past 10 years.
Posted by: Aaron Goldstein | July 25, 2009 12:43 AM
Thursday's Impact Was By Far The Worst Ever. And It is Obvious where Joe's Career Isgoing when He's Taking Advise From Such A Poor Excuse For A Wrestler. If You Want Real Career advise Go Talk To Guys Like Undertaker,hulk Hogan,jeff Jarret And Sting Who Helped Build Companies. What Gave Taz TheIdea To Give Advice He Should Do Tna Fans A Favor & Disappear Like Ecw.
Posted by: john | July 25, 2009 1:50 AM
This may be my favorite of your posts yet. While laughing I agreed with everything you said. Coul double J's absence make the show worse or is it a coincidence?
Posted by: Andy | July 25, 2009 2:19 AM
i knew it! you hate the old ecw..... though i adgree on your comments about tna
RESPONSE FROM KE: Honestly, I don't hate the old ECW. I just think that people go overboard when talking about how great it was.
Posted by: delliott | July 25, 2009 3:48 AM
I think Kurt's 13 World titles come from 10 World singles titles his Gold Olympic medal & he won a gold at the world Championships in 1995 I think & I guess you have to throw in his World tag team Title thats the only way your getting to 13 unless your Taz. Speaking of which do you think he will get in to legsl heat for dropping of the second T with Time Warner or do you think they don't care because TNA is not as big as WWE.
Posted by: frank from dundalk | July 25, 2009 7:34 AM
I was waiting for your review because I felt that you would share my outrage that Daffney was the first woman to be unceremoniously dumped out of the ring during the battle royale. Am I wrong in assuming that this baffled you as well, or was there just so much wrong with the show that you didn't have enough column to touch on it?
RESPONSE FROM KE: I did think it was silly, but, like you said, there was so much else on the show that was worse.
Posted by: Michael in Virginia | July 25, 2009 7:56 AM
Hey Kev, didn't Angle say that ANY member of MEM who lost would be removed. Shouldn't the loser of the sharmell vs Morasca match(sharmell iirc) be gone?
RESPONSE FROM KE: That's an excellent point.
Posted by: rubxcubedude | July 25, 2009 9:41 AM
I have to admit,I do laugh pretty heartily when Cody "Deaners up",turns his hat backwards and proceeds to get kneed in the nuts.Probably one of the best spots of the year.
Posted by: Bill | July 25, 2009 12:24 PM
Hey kev, with Kurt you also have to include the "World Title" he has won in Japan(IWGP)
Posted by: rubxcubedude | July 25, 2009 1:42 PM
What a nightmare TNA is becoming. Maybe Jarrett shacked up with Karen just so he'd have an excuse to get out before his vision was completely disgraced. The first episode of ECW on SciFi had more credibility with the vampires and zombies than Impact this week.
If someone has a copy, they should send a DVD of the Raw where Vince basically hit the reset button on the whole company.
There's hardly anything watchable. They're just like the Orioles of 2006, unbearable to witness and just about all hope is gone that they'll ever figure it out soon. The X Division is a shell of itself, the tag division is following suit and the Heavyweight title is passed around so much it's about as meaningless as Jenna's role in the company. Throw in the fact that every star that was supposed to be the future of the industry just gets buried over and over. It's ironic how all the vets had all these interviews about how excited they are to help Joe or AJ get over when they "crossed the line" and then they go in and punk em out nonstop. Even MVP got a better deal in his losing gimmick.
Just seems like a waste.
Posted by: James C | July 25, 2009 3:44 PM
I realize that TNA has a lot of work to do, but from a WWE weary fan's perspective, it's the best show on tv right now. WWE is, like you said on these pages, entertainment that happens to have wrestling too. Raw is just a disaster and a horrendous show. The guest host concept is idiotic and adds little to a show that is as stagnant as swamp water. Smackdown is hardly any better, and Superstars and ECW are just the worst. Impact has all of the good qualities of the two good hours of Nitro without the terribly boring first hour. Sure, MEM is basically an NWO retread, but it's more entertaining than watching Orton spar with HHH and the lame posturings of John Cena who is certainly the worst on the mic in the entire wrestling universe. Vince can have his PG rated shows for now. For my money and time Impact is the show now.
And, Kevin, any word on why WWE Is changing the names to their pay-per-views in October? I wonder how a Hell in a Cell match can be booked to still receive a PG rating and still be good. I'm guessing it can't.
Posted by: Mike | July 25, 2009 5:54 PM
Other than RVD and perhaps Sabu, the old ECW was not great from what I have seen.
Posted by: AMC | July 25, 2009 9:56 PM
"And, Kevin, any word on why WWE Is changing the names to their pay-per-views in October? I wonder how a Hell in a Cell match can be booked to still receive a PG rating and still be good. I'm guessing it can't."
If WWE's really PG there's no way those Santino/Santina transvestite and lesbian segments would have ever been on the air.
Posted by: smork | July 25, 2009 11:16 PM
"I noticed that Taz dropped one of the z’s from his name, but it appears that he gained an l, b and s. …"
According to his FB blog, he's lost 17 lbs.
RESPONSE FROM KE: Sure didn't look like it. He must have been a lot heavier in WWE than I thought.
Posted by: Ultimate Toronto | July 26, 2009 1:49 AM
hey Jack-
Did you hear that Traci Brooks recently posed for Playboy?
Good times.
Posted by: Elevation | July 26, 2009 2:21 AM
I challenge anyone to an Impact! on a pole match.
Winner gets a free ticket to an upcoming taping in Orlando
Loser gets 2.
RESPONSE FROM KE: Actually, all of the tickets to the Impact tapings are free.
Posted by: Bring Back the WWWF | July 26, 2009 6:24 AM
@ Elevation -
"Good times "..... Well said :)
Posted by: the artist formerly known as jack in hebron | July 26, 2009 9:57 AM
It never ceases to amaze me how you can point out everything TNA does wrong/bad, yet only find a few little things to critize the WWE on once and a while despite all the nonsense and garbage produced on RAW and ECW week after week. Why do you even bother covering TNA?
RESPONSE FROM KE: After last week's Impact, I am asking myself the same thing.
Posted by: Steve | July 27, 2009 1:17 PM
TV remote on a pole match, to turn that poop (TV-PG) off?
Posted by: PhatChocolateStarfish | July 28, 2009 11:21 AM