An Angle Thanksgiving
The comedy segments on TNA Impact usually produce more groans than grins, but I have to admit that last night’s Thanksgiving show was pretty funny.
The concept of the episode — having a bunch of wrestlers get together for a holiday feast — certainly wasn’t original, as WWE began doing these kinds of programs more than 20 years ago. And I’m sure some hardcore fans probably don’t appreciate the emphasis on the entertainment aspect of pro wrestling. Nevertheless, on a night when it’s likely that less people are watching, I thought it was a great idea to do a show like this rather than one that significantly advanced story lines.
Not all of the humor hit the mark and there were some continuity errors, but a few laugh-out-loud moments more than made up for it.
The show had two ongoing themes. At the Impact Zone, there was the TNA Turkey Bowl, which consisted of three triple-threat matches, with the winners advancing to a final in which the winner received $25,000 and the loser was forced to wear a turkey suit. Then, Kurt and Karen Angle, dressed as pilgrims, were hosting Thanksgiving dinner at what was supposedly their home — the Angles reside in Pittsburgh, which apparently is five minutes away from Orlando, Fla., since wrestlers were going back and forth from the Impact Zone to the Angles’ house during the show.
Here are some of the comedic highlights from the dinner segments:
*When Awesome Kong arrived, “Black Machismo” Jay Lethal said, “I didn’t know Kamala was coming.” A bug-eyed Kong then proceeded to eat plastic fruit and gnaw on huge turkey legs. During the inevitable food fight, Kong grabbed the pieces of food that flew at her and ate them.
*Black Reign let his pet rat crawl on the table and get into the food, prompting a horrified Jeremy Borash to jump up from his seat and stand on his chair. Eric Young, trying to get the rat to come to him, said, “Here, kitty kitty.” Later in the show, Black Reign had the rat sitting on his head, while an intoxicated and shirtless Young wore Black Reign’s wig.
*When Kurt Angle asked his guests to join hands for the saying of grace, Borash reached across the table to hold hands with Karen Angle rather than joining hands with A.J. Styles, who was seated next to him. Among the things that Kurt Angle said he was thankful for in the prayer was that Pacman Jones was no longer in TNA, to which everyone at the table said, “Amen!”
*Kurt Angle asked Borash, “Is that a turkey baster in your pants or are you just happy to see me?” Borash then pulled a turkey baster out of his pants.
*The funniest line of the night, however, went to the Angles’ daughter, Kyra, who turns 5 in a little over a week. When Team 3-D crashed the dinner party in the latter stages of the program, everyone — both faces and heels — decided to leave. The former Dudleys sat down at the small table Kyra was sitting at, and Brother Ray said, “How are you, little girl?” Kyra, who had not said a word all night, replied with perfect inflection and timing: “You guys suck!”
The only thing missing was the presence of Mr. Backlund. When someone asked for a wing, he could have jumped across the table and applied the cross-face chicken wing on them.
As far as the wrestling on the show, the Turkey Bowl matches were decent and the main event between Styles, Samoa Joe and Chris Sabin was really good, despite the fact that it was predictable that Joe would win and Styles would end up in the turkey suit.