Peter Schmuck wants you to know that, contrary to popular belief, he is more than just a bon vivant, raconteur and collector of blousy flowered shirts. He is a semi-respected journalist who has covered virtually every sport -- except luge, of course – and tackled issues that transcend the mere games people play. If that isn’t enough to qualify him to provide witty, wide-ranging commentary on the sports world ... and the rest of the world, for that matter ... he is an avid reader of history, biography and the classics, as well as a charming blowhard who pops off on both sports and politics on WBAL Radio. That means you can expect a little of everything in
The Schmuck Stops Here, but the major focus will be keeping you up to the minute on Baltimore’s major sports teams and themes, whether it’s throwing up the Orioles lineup the minute it’s announced or updating you on the latest sprained ankle in Owings Mills. Oh, and by the way, that’s Mr. Schmuck to you.

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Comments
Pete
You are worth keeping around just for your sense of humor.
Posted by: Ed D. | February 21, 2010 11:43 AM
Pete,
Your follow up question should have been - Does that include playoff games?
Posted by: Rusty | February 21, 2010 11:53 AM
Why do so many pro athletes have to act either bored or dumb in interviews? The orioles not only have another team that will be below 500 this year, they have (with guys like Wieters and Markakis) possibly the least marketable, unintelligent cast of characters in the game.
Posted by: Anonymous | February 21, 2010 12:01 PM
Downright Bedardian.
Posted by: Jeff V. | February 21, 2010 12:12 PM
Jeff,
very true!
Posted by: Anonymous | February 21, 2010 12:16 PM
Anonymous,
Just because Markakis and Wieters are men of few words, doesn't make them unintelligent. Wieters' answer wasn't dumb at all. He was short and to the point. Depending on his delivery, the exchange could be construed as downright vaudevillian.
In the same vein, just because you like to run your mouth in anonymity on a website, doesn't mean that you are intelligent. In fact, I would assume the opposite is true... since you missed out on the humor of Wieters' response.
Posted by: Chris in Hawaii | February 21, 2010 12:23 PM
Chris,
The fact is... If Wieters, or any Oriole for that matter, stuck a bat up Pete's you know what, during an interview, you would find a positive spin. No one within the Orioles organization will ever do anything that upsets you. That's fine, but maybe you should admit such.
Teams must be able to market their players. Have you ever heard Wieters or Markakis speak? It's a joke!
Simple, courteous social skills are usually needed when one plays in a pro sports. These two guys are like tree stumps!
Posted by: Anonymous | February 21, 2010 12:40 PM
162 is the perfect answer and I love the follow up comment by Rusty, "Does that include playoff games?"
Brilliant.
Posted by: bms | February 21, 2010 1:08 PM
No disrespect to Pete, but it was a dumb question.
Posted by: Darrin | February 21, 2010 1:15 PM
He did go to Georgia Tech. It takes some intelligence to get into that college.
Posted by: Jim | February 21, 2010 1:28 PM
As Mr. Lincoln once said,
"Four score and seven years ago, Baltimore last had a good baseball team. "
Posted by: rockvillejake | February 21, 2010 1:32 PM
Chris in Hawaii, I agree with you 100%, All I care about is how they play, not whether they are in the running for the Terrrell Owens'Look at me" award. Wieters is doing absolutely the right thing, he has his head down and he is here to speak with his bat and his glove. As long as the players are accessible and aren't rude to the press like that cretin Albert Belle was, Pete and the other writers have nothing to complain about.
Posted by: tony | February 21, 2010 1:41 PM
Ha,
Perfect! Whenever a player as the personality of a cardboard box, people say 'i just want him to perform on the field'. Thanks for chiming in tony - like clockwork!
For the record, that's what I want as well. The point was/is, it's too bad most elite level athletes have the social skills of rotten dry wall.
That's fine f you're an accountant. It sucks when your profession is so close to the public.
Posted by: Anonymous | February 21, 2010 1:52 PM
How did he look Pete...did he compliment you on your new shirt?
Wieters is on his way to building to Dale Murphy type stats this year. I know Murphy was a tad quicker as he did play CF but as a hitter they are identical!!
.............................................................................................
Pete's reply: He looks leaner and stronger, and he's a lot more comfortable.
Posted by: Wayne | February 21, 2010 1:57 PM
All I have to say is, we all LOVED Kevin Millar, oh boy he was so funny and kept everyone loose.
Then the Orioles lost another 13 in a row, and Millar is popping up with guys on 2nd and 3rd...suddenly he wasn't quite so funny anymore, and we were cursing him out of town.
It's hard to find that nice blend of personality and performance, but it's kind of funny how winning suddenly turns everyone into a comedian, and losing turns everyone into Calvin Coolidge.
Posted by: John From Rochester NY | February 21, 2010 1:59 PM
Anon, why is player marketing so important? I'm more interested in W's than if a player interviews well. I've never understood the fascination with Bedard's media responses. If he or any other player doesn't feel like answering any or all questions with a "Ghost of Earl"-like discertation, what problem would you have with that? Social skills come in different guises and I, for one, prefer the silent, humble type rather than someone full of cliches, canned answers, and the above-mentioned "Look at ME!" types. I realize it's a personal matter and you and I can disagree. I've never had a camera or microphone in my face, but I'm sure I would be a bit nervous, making for a sound-bite disaster. Perhaps the O's could hire someone to give them interviewing lessons, ala Crash Davis to Nuke LaLoosh:
Crash Davis: It's time to work on your interviews.
Ebby Calvin LaLoosh: My interviews? What do I gotta do?
Crash Davis: You're gonna have to learn your clichés. You're gonna have to study them, you're gonna have to know them. They're your friends. Write this down: "We gotta play it one day at a time."
Ebby Calvin LaLoosh: Got to play... it's pretty boring.
Crash Davis: 'Course it's boring, that's the point. Write it down.
Posted by: Mike in Ohio | February 21, 2010 2:05 PM
I just feel that one word answers, as well as an overall demeanor suggesting 'why are you talking to me' is disrespectful to the fans.
It's also disrespectful to media types like Pete who are only trying to do their jobs. Pete won't admit it, but trust me, he hated that Wieters acted in such a way.
I'm not saying that athletes always have to be full of personality. I am saying they need to show respect all the time though. Cal and Jeter are perfect examples. Not always the most exciting interview, but always respectful.
..............................................................................................
Pete's reply: I think everybody misunderstood. Wieters was not being disrespectful at all. He's a real nice kid. I was just having fun with his brief response to my question.
Posted by: Anonymous | February 21, 2010 2:18 PM
reminds me of the time a reporter asked basketball coach Tom Nissalke how he pronounced his name, and Nissalke replied "Tom". Being a man of few words does not equate to stupidity or lack of intelligence. Pete, thanks so much for the updates from ST! I'm starting to feel human again.
Posted by: dave taylor | February 21, 2010 2:19 PM
Guess the ump won't be breaking up too many mound conferences when he's catching. I can hear it now when Millwood's pitching.
Wieters - Sinker
Millwood - no
Wieters - Ok
Posted by: Bob F. | February 21, 2010 3:03 PM
224 days remaining
Posted by: Trembley Watch | February 21, 2010 3:27 PM
We really need more people here posting as anonymous ripping the Oriole's players because they don't like the answer to a basically irrevalent question. (no offense Pete) If he didn't answer that way, I would be disappointed as he would be making a statement that he wasn't 100% on board with giving his all. If you want to be a troll, have some cojones and give a name.
Posted by: troyn | February 21, 2010 4:40 PM
Are you guys serious? Who cares if it's a one word answer? This isn't news. And questioning his intelligence? Wow twelve losing seasons must have ate away at fans souls. This is ridiculous one small interview makes him into "bedard" and makes him disrespectful. Guys, get a life if that's how you feel
Posted by: Ben F | February 21, 2010 4:55 PM
Anonymous,
Isn't it kind of petty to bash on a quiet player when the team you root for is knee deep in a 12 year losing streak? He can be mute for all I care, at this point I only want to see him do his talking with his bat and behind the plate.
If you want to hear stupid, listen to a basketball interview.
Reporter: How do you feel about todays win?
Player: You know we dribbled the ball up and down the court, you know then we made a few 3 pointers, you know but avoided penalties, you know but that injury hurt the other team, you know but it benefited us, know what I mean?
Reporter - So how do you feel about your teams shot at the playoffs?
Player - Well, you know, pretty good but it's a long season, you know but I feel we got a solid team this year, you know, but yea, we'll prolly see ya there *wink*.
Posted by: dave in glen burnie | February 21, 2010 5:07 PM
I just want to point out how great a sign it is that one of the few things left for the perpetual complainers to try and incite a fight over is whether players use too few words in answering questions.
Perpetual complainers will always find something to whine about. Therefore, the true measure of the team's progress from their perspective isn't the amount of complaining, but the subject matter.
Just continued evidence that the team is moving in the right direction. Just need to keep it up when the games matter.
Posted by: DJ | February 21, 2010 6:09 PM
Wow, Anonymous. It's a good thing that Pete has you to speak for him, since you believe he can't speak for himself.
We should all bow down to your extreme intellect. Obviously it's hopeless if someone as wise as yourself can't figure out how to market an immense talent who was recently one of the top prospects in the game...
Posted by: Chris in Hawaii | February 21, 2010 6:14 PM
its not uncommon for Wayne (Anonymous) to be negative as I recall he is that way about every topic!
Posted by: kramer | February 21, 2010 6:14 PM
I didn't say Abe Lincoln, I said HEY BLINKIN'!
Posted by: SHAMROCK | February 21, 2010 6:44 PM
You want better answers? You gotta ask questions that lead to them. How many words does he need to say to say '162?'
Rule #1 when interviewing a 'celebrity': Listen to the answers
Rule #2: Don't ask a question that gives them the option of a one word answer.
..............................................................................................
Pete's reply: Rule No. 3. When somebody does a tongue-in-cheek entry, don't take it too seriously and lecture the reporter with 32 years or major league experience on how to do an interview.
Posted by: cush | February 21, 2010 6:44 PM
Man... MacPhail really phailed on this one. I knew we should have got Delgado...
http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/news/story?id=4931383
Posted by: SHAMROCK | February 21, 2010 6:55 PM
Delgado was gimping around 1b in the carribean and it was easy to see he shouldn't be signed. I was one that would have liked to see him in the 4 hole, if he was healthy...the guy produces.
"Carlos, does your hip hurt?"
"yes"
O crap, what a jerk!
Posted by: cush | February 21, 2010 7:13 PM
Actually, four score and seven years ago, the Orioles did have a good team.
The 1923 International League Orioles went 111-53, eleven games ahead of Rochester.
One of the pitchers for that Oriole team was Lefty Grove. He went 27-10 but wasn't the ace. That honor went to Rube Parnham (33-7).
Another pitcher with an interesting name although no real connection was John Ogden.
That team also had a player splitting time between 2B and 3B by the name of Fritz Maisel. His descendent would later write for The Sun for many years.
Posted by: waspman | February 21, 2010 8:24 PM
waspman....that was impressive research on your part! Glad you're still on here. :)
p.s. Bob Maisel was the BEST...(Pete's ok too..though)
Posted by: Bob F. | February 21, 2010 8:31 PM
Well, I guess it is good that we, as fans, care so much that we dissect a humorous blog post as a commentary on the intelligence of one player is seems like a good guy and a great major leaguer to be, and an outfielder who the team just signed to a long-term contract, plays his butt off, and has a great charity in the community. I can't wait to see what happens when O's actually play a game in the preseason.
Posted by: Vincent | February 22, 2010 12:31 AM
Well, I guess it is good that we, as fans, care so much that we dissect a humorous blog post as a commentary on the intelligence of one player who seems like a good guy and a great major leaguer to be, and an outfielder who the team just signed to a long-term contract, plays his butt off, and has a great charity in the community. I can't wait to see what happens when O's actually play a game in the preseason.
Posted by: Vincent | February 22, 2010 12:32 AM
Pete,glad to hearthat you came up with entry number 3.We have had our disagreements over the years but I've always enjoyed your sense of humor and as a fan I often think how difficult it must be to cover a team and come up with intelligent questions after 12 mind numbing losing seasons.The jury is still out for me for this year,as I'm sure it is for a lot of peole.However being an Oriole fan specifically and a baseball fan in general,it's still kind of hard not to feel that little bit of excitement when I heard "pitchers and catchers report for assignment".Hope springs eternal.I haven't posted much since last year when somebody bashed me for qouting from an article to which I gave much more credence that that person's opinion.A lot of things would have to go right for the Orioles to finish .500 or better but until the season plays itself out,who's to say that maybe they will?Or won't for that matter.I think I like the Tejada deal and the Atkins deal,but only time will tell.So until them I'll give AM the benefit of the doubt.Just because I disagree with a certain move means I want the Orioles to lose,in fact quite the opposite,like most true Orioles fans on here,it would be nice to see the O's playing meaningful baseball in September.Hope the Achilles is doing well ,by the way.And it looks like this anonymous,people posting as other people nonsense has at least slowed down.I hope there is away to put an end to it.Enjoy Florida,looks like this week may see some more snow.
Posted by: Burt from Essex | February 22, 2010 3:40 AM
Brother Schmuck,
I love reading your articles. They are always funny. The thing I like most is that your respond to the comments. I wish more of the columnists would do that, especially Mike Preston. The comments are so ridiculous sometimes that it's great to hear you fire back at someone. Keep up the good work!! I loved that third rule!
Posted by: Anonymous | February 22, 2010 9:10 AM
Anonymous-
Whats worse about Preston, when he finally gets arounf to approving posts, he edits them.
He cut out a whole paragraph I wrote comparing the Monday AM QB show to a bunch of grouchy old women.
In a blog and sports talk in general, I look for the author to know more than I do so I learn something, unlike a lot of radio shows around here that let callers take over and know little about the nuts and bolts of sports.
Posted by: SHAMROCK | February 22, 2010 10:36 AM
Anonymous-
Whats worse about Preston, when he finally gets arounf to approving posts, he edits them.
He cut out a whole paragraph I wrote comparing the Monday AM QB show to a bunch of grouchy old women.
In a blog and sports talk in general, I look for the author to know more than I do so I learn something, unlike a lot of radio shows around here that let callers take over and know little about the nuts and bolts of sports.
Posted by: SHAMROCK | February 22, 2010 10:36 AM
Thought it was just me, Shamrock, I have sent Preston whole posts that never made it to the board. No Nudity or offensive language included either.
I did infer that he spent too much time in the shower with a particular player and I guess that soured our relationship.
Posted by: tony | February 22, 2010 10:59 AM
I was going to go with a "4 scores and 7 at bats ago" joke, but it looks like the Wietersburg Address has been covered. So instead I will limit the Matt to Abe comparisons with the hopes that Matt can emancipate us from being under the boots of the Yankees and Red Sox.
Posted by: Big Daddy (Not Lipscomb) | February 22, 2010 11:29 AM
Kramer I rarely see you talk baseball on the blog, only about other posters. How about some baseball talk going forward. Are you merely the blog rhetoric critic or would you like to contribute to the discussion?
Posted by: tony | February 22, 2010 7:20 PM
Yeah, Wieters does remind of Dale Murphy in stance - with hands held low and never really still. Lets hope he learns to pull the ball the way Murphy did.
Posted by: onceawarrior | February 22, 2010 10:39 PM