baltimoresun.com

« Looking for some horse sense | Main | O's youth movement takes another step forward »

May 14, 2009

Cool for Cats

It has come to my attention that our new sports columnist -- former features columnist Kevin Cowherd -- has publicly expressed an anti-cat bias, which puts me in the awkward position of being the only Sun columnist who will be there to defend cats whenever there's a cat-related sports issue.

cowherd%20mug.jpgThis is certainly going to increase my already hefty workload, which includes several columns per week, this blog (and holding your hands through this Orioles season is a full-time job in itself) and a radio talkshow. I kind of figured that since Cowherd the Cat-basher had been a features columnist for many years, he would come with a special sensitivity for the smallest and weakest among us, but I obviously was misinformed.

So, I reluctantly accept this responsibility. If a popular NFL quarterback is caught running an illegal cat-fighting ring, I'll be there. If an unscrupulous trainer is pumping steroids into his cats to gain advantage in the Calico Breeders Cup. I'll be there. Whereever there's a cat being exploited or misrepresented or even just misunderstood in a sports setting, I'll be there. If there's a cat reading the Grapes of Wrath and doesn't have proper lighting, I'll be there, too.

Not Cowherd. Just thought you'd like to know.

Posted by Peter Schmuck at 3:32 PM | | Comments (12)
Categories: Schmuck being Schmuck
        

Comments

The more important question: Would he stop to save a turtle trying to cross the road?

You are my hero.

Mr. Cowherd is a veteran newspaper guy and he will add to the sports department.

I am pleased to see that anybody keeps their job in this economy. Welcome Mr. Cowherd.

They hired a new sports columnist? I was under the impression the others were let go due to financial considerations. Seems to me they were just fired, Pete.

Can the Sun be honest? Is that possible?

.............................................................................................
Pete's reply: Cowherd transfered from the Features department.

I'm with you Pete, big cat fan.

check out www.lolcats.com if you haven't already.

Let's go Nolan!

Pete,

I have the cat scratch fever!


"The perception of horse racing as a sport in total decline is magnified in Maryland, because of the dilapidated condition of Pimlico and the lack of consensus on how to re-energize the industry."

That pretty much sums up the state of Maryland and especially Baltimore city. They are so busy looking for handouts and complaining about things that they do NOTHING until things are too late.
We have horrible facilities at the race tracks, didn't do anything about a new football stadium until it was too late and of course the city has a civic center (or whatever the name is this week) that should have been replace DECADES ago.
Horrible, incompetent city government. Too busy pointing fingers at each other.

Nice Squeeze reference, Pete! Never really understood why it's perfectly acceptable in our society to hate cats, but dare to utter one unkind word about dogs and you better have someone else start your car for you. Thanks for sticking up for the cat freaks of the world!

just so you know - the hand-holding is much appreciated.
oh, and o's are the only birds my cats like.

Those of us who are old enough remember when Cowherd covered Sports for the Evening Sun!

Back in the days when the term "I-pod" would have solicited comments of "some kind of plant?", there was in Baltimore something called THE EVENING SUN. Mr. Cowherd wrote for this oxymoronic sounding publication, back when his hair was brown and he didn't look like some kind of hairy, grizzled Robert Duvall. Anyway, Mr. Cowherd decided to slam down the gauntlet and had a "dogs vs cats" contest, encouraging people to write in with their argument, pro or con, as to which pet they liked best. I was a virulent anti-dog-ite at the time, my prejudice arising from a childhood incident where an English setter decided to use the back of my 7-year-old head as a chew toy (I needed 36 stitches, thank you), so I immediately set down my 18-pound cat, Muffin (Catzilla would have been a much better name, but he was so adorable as a cute gray fuzzball of a kitten, my entire family was struck with Gidget's disease and so named him...Muffin) and wrote in. Happily, Mr. Cowherd chose to run my thoughts which basically said, "Dogs roam in packs while cats are solitary stalkers who think they are special. Translation: Dogs are socialists and cats are Americans." I also noted that dogs would kow-tow to anyone with a firm hand, a strong voice and big bag of kibble. Cats...they're more selective about whom they hang with, which to me, makes them more human...I mean, do YOU like everyone you meet? As the years past and I met other dogs who weren't the real-life four-legged manifestation of Cujo, my dislike of dogs waned. Still, you have to love a cat. They're like self-cleaning ovens. You get one, they're automatically house trained (pretty much), they clean themselves and they keep down the mouse/bird population. What's not to like about that?

Even though Cowherd is probably part of the elite leftist establishment at the Calvert Street Democratic Club, his dislike for cats gets him points in my book. Because - the only good cat is a dead cat!

Post a comment

Please enter the letter "h" in the field below:
About Peter Schmuck
Peter Schmuck wants you to know that, contrary to popular belief, he is more than just a bon vivant, raconteur and collector of blousy flowered shirts. He is a semi-respected journalist who has covered virtually every sport -- except luge, of course – and tackled issues that transcend the mere games people play. If that isn’t enough to qualify him to provide witty, wide-ranging commentary on the sports world ... and the rest of the world, for that matter ... he is an avid reader of history, biography and the classics, as well as a charming blowhard who pops off on both sports and politics on WBAL Radio. That means you can expect a little of everything in The Schmuck Stops Here, but the major focus will be keeping you up to the minute on Baltimore’s major sports teams and themes, whether it’s throwing up the Orioles lineup the minute it’s announced or updating you on the latest sprained ankle in Owings Mills. Oh, and by the way, that’s Mr. Schmuck to you.

Schmuck column archive

Upload a photo of yourself or a friend wearing the new Peter Schmuck T-shirt, which is on sale at gotschmuck.com
-- ADVERTISEMENT --

Most Recent Comments
Photo galleries

Search our new database for every home run hit hit by the O's and the opposition — home and away — since 1992.

Buy Sports Tickets from the Baltimore Sun Store

Sign up for FREE Orioles alerts
Get free Sun alerts sent to your mobile phone.*
Get free Baltimore Sun mobile alerts
Sign up for Orioles text alerts

Returning user? Update preferences.
Sign up for more Sun text alerts
*Standard message and data rates apply. Click here for Frequently Asked Questions.
Blog updates
Recent updates to baltimoresun.com sports blogs
 Subscribe to this feed
Stay connected