Several readers already have contacted me about today's column -- to share their own thoughts and experiences when it comes to family and choices and distance. Please post your comments on this blog for others to read.

Robert Byrnes, who edited the column, just returned from visiting in-laws in Florida and noted the loss of a central place for family gatherings, and how easy it used to be for families to get together. "Maybe a follow-up," he suggested in a note last night, "could be people who move away and then come back to Baltimore to be near family."

Here's a comment from reader Mannlou: "Thanks for a very reflective piece. There is often so much pain in family life through divorce and separation. I often wonder how it is for those whose parents never bother to marry. Your insights might help us to better understand the suffering of
many of the Latino immigrants who come here to earn enough money to send home, or who hope to bring their family to the US. Separation from family, even when we think we don't need them, is the ultimate form of loss only made more real through death."