Blood-spraying Japanese anime meets Gladiator, Gladiator meets Kill Bill, and all the slashing and clanging and speer-chuckin' looks like one long trailer for a PlayStation game. (Which it is!) At moments I wish I'd had a wireless controller. I might have been able to stop some of the decapitations. There were lots of them. Must be a record for decapitations. One Spartan stands there for like an hour while his head rolls around his sandals. The leading man, the one playing King Leonidas, stuck me as a guy who spits when he speaks. I wanted to shower when it was over. Saw it at The Senator. Coach Dave Pietramala and the Hopkins lacrosse team was there. Maybe they're considering a new phalanx-style defense this season. If I were Petro, I'd worry about his guys getting too many slashing penalties at Syracuse this weekend. Would I suggest you pay cash-money to see this film? Only if your only other choice is Renee Zellweger as Beatrix Potter. Seriously, wait for the DVD -- or just get the video game.