90210 recap: Commitment is hard
If you ever wonder why men (and definitely a few women) are so reticent about commitment, all you need to do is watch an episode of 90210. Being fully into or supportive of a friend or a partner is hard, and often it can turn around and end up biting you in the buttocks. But hell, at least it beats being totally alone, right? RIGHT?
Who needs hopes and dreams when you have sex?
It's that wonderful, nervous-tic-inducing time of year when college seniors start hearing from prospective colleges, and things are looking rosy for Naomi and Max. Naomi got into CU and Max got into the Massachusetts Institute of Technology...in Massachusetts. Naomi's a little shaken by the daunting miles between, but seems overall positive on their odds. Max just wants to make the most of the time they have, which he spends playing Black Ops with his buddies -- not exactly what NaoMe-Me-Me had in mind.
But eventually Max caves and tells Naomi that he's changing his plans to Cal Tech. Never mind that MIT is the most elite scientific school in the country. Now he has a girlfriend that's willing to commando-ize herself in the middle of campus.
Read on for lies and the worst enabler ever.
What goes up...
Silver is still buzzing like a school bell about her interview, and her sky-high attitude is starting to become more obviously off to the guys. The alarm really sounds for Navid when she gets her rejection letter and refuses to eat, bathe or seemingly stand on her own feet for days. And when the subject of her meds is broached Navid gets kicked out of Silver's house of mourning for the offense.
Not knowing what else to do, Navid calls Dixon, who's well versed in Silver's past issues. Using a ruse of offering to taker her out for food, Dixon drives his pal to a psych clinic, where Navid and a doctor are waiting. They eventually convince a panicky Silver to go inside, where the doctor confirms that she had a manic episode. Ade shows up to prove that she's still a good friend and give Navid a ride home -- or she's just there to get him drunk at her place, exaggerate about Silver's issues and snuggle with him once he passes out. So we're definitely considering that Adrianna is just a genuine sociopath.
Tell me lies
Teddy is really into Marco/Soccer Guy, but when Marco keeps turning down plans he starts to get suspicious. After seeking advice from Annie and Naomi and getting an absolutely hilarious gay soccer scenario from the always dirty-minded Naomi, Teddy goes out to visit Marco at a soccer game. But when he gets to the field he discovers there's no game tonight (disregard that half of the games would be at other schools), and then finds out that Marco's mansion is actually just where his mother works as the housekeeper. Teddy tracks his lying beau down where he works at a fast food joint and Marco confesses his financial woes: he lives in East L.A., has a soccer scholarship and works a couple jobs. But Teddy doesn't care about that, he just doesn't want to be lied to. Wow, he really is a relationship guy.
Mommy dearest
So Jen is back, and it's mildly disappointing. True, she does disturb Debbie and Matthews' slow slog toward normalcy and she calls Debbie "the help," but the zip isn't there and we want it back, personal improvement and therapy be damned! We're calling for some teeth-gnashing.
Jen does at least threaten to take Jacques with her to Paris -- you know, kind of like a lap-dog -- but Matthews puts his foot down. Jacques will stay in L.A. and Debbie will continue to help raise him. Jen seems willing to accept this with the condition that she buys all his clothes (please no more leather baby pants), but we wonder if this is the calm before the storm.
I'm ready for my closeup, Mr. DeVille
With her soft spot for birds with broken wings, Annie confronts Marla about her suicide pamphlets and tries to get her to let go of the idea. Social interaction is what Marla needs, Annie decides, and convinces her to attend a screening of one of her classic films with an after-party. The theme is 60's mod, and Marla, Annie, Liam, Ivy, Raj, Naomi, and eventually (hotly!) Max sally out in style. Well, Naomi looks like a Fembot and Liam's discomfort in a turtleneck is more than metaphorical during awkward moments, but everyone else looks boss.
Marla isn't looking forward to the evening until she sees the throngs of young Californians out to watch her flick. She gets a standing ovation at the end and everyone parties down Austin Powers-style at the afters. Marla thanks Annie for a wonderful evening and gives her a necklace, at which point Obligatory Man in the Room postulates that she'll dive off the balcony, which we refute with the fact that 90210 doesn't have the budget for a stunt like that. Plus, that's really gruesome. Instead, we get a much classier and heartbreaking off-camera discovery the next morning, when Annie finds Marla's final goodbye letter.
What did you think, readers? We bitched about Ade last week -- now since she's even worse, is there any redemption? Will Silver forgive Navid and Dixon? Was Marla right to want to die with dignity? Will Liam figure out how to get that turtleneck off? Tell us in the comments!
Notes n' Quotes
Max: Please don't take off your underwear in public, Naomi.
Naomi: I think geek is the new chic.
Naomi: You have any babies you need sitting on?
Naomi: I think I know the number of 911....
Jen: You're dating the help?
Matthews: Shes wearing flats now, like that's supposed to impress me.
Debbie: Flats? Really? Wow.
Naomi: You bought a skinny tie!
Max: Actually, I made one. Turns out all you need is a regular tie and a pair of scissors.
Jen: I had a hard time finding a place I felt comfortable parking my car in this neighborhood.
Jen: Aren't you going to invite me in?
Matthews: Oh yes, yes. It's like inviting in a vampire.
Final Thoughts
- We know Navid is having a rough time with Silver, but he may have been overreacting a little with all the Scotch-chugging.
- Seriously, Max should invent time travel at Cal Tech and go live in the 60's. He looked damn good.