MomofBeans asked: "How do you break a toddler of a biting habit, when she isn't doing it at home, but is doing it at daycare when other children get in her personal space or attempt to take a toy from her?"
I called Margo Sipes, executive director of Downtown Baltimore Child Care, who previously advised us on easing transitions from house to day care. Here's what she recommended:
--First, remember that biting, though distressing, is common among toddlers. "Toddlers are still very oral," she said. "They learn and solve problems through their mouths."
--Don't be surprised if biting happens in a center rather than at home, because the center is where peers are -- and where conflict naturally arises as young kids interact. "Oftentimes the biting happens because there is a conflict over toys or the teacher's lap or one square foot of space in the classroom."
--Have the child shadowed. The best way to solve the problem, Sipes said, is for an adult at the center to be in charge of "shadowing" the toddler -- being close by him as much as possible -- to gently intervene when a bite is about to happen. "Someone right there who can put their hand and redirect (the child) to a more socially acceptable response." It's important for the adult to validate the child's feelings, by saying something like, "I can see you want that toy. Tell him you want it. Say, 'Turn please?' Or, 'Play with this while you’re waiting.'"
--Don't punish. If you do, the child will learn only that he's "bad," but not how to be good, Sipes says. Instead, the center should work on validating feelings and teaching him better ways to express needs. Also, be low-key about the biting. A big reaction may prompt the child to see if he can get the same reaction by biting again.
--Be patient. Breaking the biting habit could take a while -- maybe 4 to 6 weeks, Sipes says.