Family meals: Who really has time for that?
Liz Atwood talks about her own family dinners this Tween Tuesday. The results of the poll she cites don't quite jibe with our own less scientific Dinner Together poll:
The National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse (CASA) at Columbia University recently released a study that said teens who have frequent family dinners (five or more per week) make better grades and are less likely to use tobacco and try alcohol and drugs than teens who eat with their families less than three times a week.
Perhaps even more surprising was that about 60 percent of kids say they eat meals with their families more than five days a week and that the average family dinner lasts 35 minutes.
Sadly, this is not the picture in my house. It isn’t unusual for me to come home after the kids have eaten dinner. When I am able to get everyone assembled for a meal, it's usually just a matter of minutes before the younger one declares that he doesn’t like what we’re having and the older one proclaims that he isn’t very hungry. I might keep them at the table 10 minutes, but certainly not 35.
Believe me, I have tried to enforce family meal times, but it seems like with work, meetings and sports, it is rare for us to all be together at the table. It was bad enough worrying whether the kids were eating nutritious meals. Now I have to worry that unless we eat together the kids will quit school and turn to drugs.
Am I the only one who lives like this? Do most families really sit down and eat dinner together for more than a half hour most nights of the week?
(Photo by Baltimore Sun photographer Kim Hairston)
Comments
We do, but my kids are also younger. And it's not usually 35 minutes because it takes us less time to eat, but we spend time cooking it together, then cleaning up afterwards. It's not easy though and with both kids in preschool, it means I need to plan in advance.
Posted by: Kayris | October 13, 2009 1:17 PM
My kids are all grown up now, but we made it work. Because of our schedules we seldom sat down before 8 p.m., but we did all sit down together. Many days there was some heavy snacking after school so the kids could survive until dinnertime.
Posted by: Dahlink | October 13, 2009 3:23 PM
It is very important for a family that they eat together means they will stay together forever
http://www.craigspr.org
Posted by: craigspr | October 13, 2009 7:12 PM
We eat in six nights a week. Usually two seatings--one for the littles and then an adult dinner. It adds an air of civility to the house. I'm a big proponent of the dining in and write a weekly food post/recipe swap on my blog, Momtrends.
Here is a link to see what other moms are cooking:
http://momtrends.blogspot.com/search/label/friday%20feasts
Posted by: Nicole Feliciano | October 13, 2009 8:48 PM
To us it was important for everyone to sit down together. The point of this was brought home to me when a good friend with a child the same age as our older son told me about the adults going over their work day at dinner, until their three-year-old piped up: "And how was MY day?" Everyone can contribute!
Posted by: Dahlink | October 14, 2009 7:28 PM
I agree with Dahlink. As a family nutritionist and a busy mom I know both how important family dinners are and how difficult they can be to orchestrate. A family meal is where everyone sits down together and chooses from the same food. In addition to all the benefits already mentioned, family meals help kids to grow up to eat a wide variety of foods and know how to conduct themselves socially at a meal. They cannot learn this if they are relegated to their own eating time.
Posted by: Diana | October 16, 2009 11:55 AM
Thank you, Diana!
Posted by: Dahlink | October 16, 2009 4:49 PM