Lots of you who commented under my John and Kate Plus 2 watch Jon and Kate Plus 8 post the other day were worried about how all the marital strife being aired on the popular reality show is affecting the eight Gosselin kids.

Now, so is the state of Pennsylvania, where the family lives.

The Pennsylvania Department of Labor is looking into whether "Jon & Kate Plus 8," produced by Maryland-based TLC, complies with child labor laws. According to the Associated Press story, TLC is saying it complies with state laws and regulations when it films the show.

It will be interesting to see what this investigation turns up, if anything. But in the meantime, I can't help but wonder if it will add yet more stress to the lives of these kids.

(Associated Press photo by Carolyn Kaster)

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 1:59 PM | Permalink | Comments (21)
Categories: Television
        

Today's Guest Dad is Dan Taylor of Lutherville, a work-at-home dad also known as the Hungover Gourmet. He has an instructive tale for the outdoor cooking season, about what happens when Daddy tries to keep his toddler away from the grill.

Here's Dan:

"They say that as your time in this world ends your whole life flashes before your eyes, and since movies have done nothing to dispel the notion, I’m a believer. What "they" don’t tell you is that a similar thing happens when a life begins, though my flashes focused on the more 'colorful' things I’d done.

"Moments after our daughter Ryan was born digital cameras captured the joy, pride, panic, and excitement that was splashed across my face as I held her for the first time. What they couldn’t capture was the abject fear that The Past Police would come crashing through the door, waving permanent records that catalogued forty years of misdeeds and bad ideas – from dumping paint out a grade school window to the ill-advised decisions that come from hanging at a college radio station all day and punk clubs all night. Given my colorful past I wondered if I had what it took to help raise her properly, keep her safe and steer her away from harm.

"These days I have a subtle reminder that there is some truth to that old adage "do as I say, not as I do (or did)", even at a young age.

"With her second birthday on the horizon and our grill needing a cleaning before her party, I took advantage of the pleasant spring weather to fire up the stainless steel behemoth, polish its doors and clean its grates. As Ryan wandered around the patio scoping out bugs and kicking her ball, I firmly but gently reminded her that the grill was not a toy and she should give it a wide berth -- a tough sell to a kid who loves hanging in the kitchen with parents who enjoy cooking.

"As the grill’s temperature gauge pushed past the 500-degree mark, and I made sure my daughter was out of harm’s way, I opened the doors to inspect the grill’s storage area, reached inside and promptly gave myself a half-dollar-sized burn on my wrist. A torrent of expletives rushed from my brain to my mouth as I clenched my teeth, hopped to my feet and emitted nothing more than a low 'Youch!'.

"The exclamation attracted the attention of Ryan, who rushed over to ask one of her favorite questions – "Whahappen?" That presented the opportunity to explain that Daddy had done something careless and she should remember that the grill was hot and dangerous, even to a 42-year-old who should know better. As she gave me a hug and asked to see my "boo-boo," I felt some of the fear I felt that night two years ago slipping away. Even if it hurt like hell."

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 6:49 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
Categories: Father's Day Tuesday
        

The Scripps National Spelling Bee -- that rare educational event that also makes for great drama -- concludes tonight, with finals to be broadcast at 8 p.m. on ABC.

If you'd like to take advantage of your child's (and your) interest in the Bee, take this fun quiz, which is the next best thing to being there (you get audio pronunciations for the words, along with some etymological clues).

Though I did well on the test, I wouldn't have quite made it to the quarter finals (sniff). I need to study harder.

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 9:50 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
        

Fun on tap this weekend includes story times, an early summer reading kickoff in Columbia, and children's theater (see the set for "Goodnight Moon," on the left) and ballet. Thanks to Ethan Goldberg for his compilations:

Thursday, May 28:

Nature Storytime: Listen to children’s literature before creating nature crafts at Eden Mill Nature Center, 1617 Eden Mill Rd., Pylesville, 11 a.m.-noon. All ages. Free. Call 410-836-3050 to make a reservation, or visit edenmill.org.

Behind the Bees Knees: Through interactive games, learn how honey-bees create their honey with the help of flowers and other insects at the Abingdon branch of the Harford County Public Library, 2510 Tollgate Road, Abingdon. 6:30-7:30 p.m. Grades 2-6. Free. Call 410-638-3990 to make a reservation, or visit hcplonline.info.

The Life Beyond: What's Next After High School What happens after, "school's out for summer?" Is it really, "out forever?" Find out from guest speakers of the Aberdeen Youth Program in different workshops about college, work, and finances at the Aberdeen branch of the Harford County Public Library, 21 Franklin Street, Aberdeen, 21001, 2:30-6 p.m. Ages 13-18. Free. Call 410-808-2021 to make a reservation, or visit hcplonline.info.

Friday, May 29:

Bird Banding: Understand the movement, survival, and behavior of birds while occasionally walking to check the nets at the Joe Vangrin Memorial Pavilion of the Eden Mill Nature Center, 1617 Eden Mill Rd., Pylesville, 7 a.m.-12 p.m. All ages. Free. Call 410-836-3050, or visit edenmill.org.

Saturday, May 30:

Summer Reading Kickoff: Celebrate the start of summer reading with games at the East Columbia branch of the Howard County Library, 6600 Cradle Rock Way, Columbia. A 5K Fun Run to raise money for the library will start at 8 a.m.; other events 9 a.m.-1 p.m. All ages. Fun Run $30-$40; other events are free. Call 410-313-7730, or visit hclibrary.org.

Howard County Ballet's Production of Little Red Riding Hood: Watch director Kathi Ferguson’s choreographed version of Little Red Riding Hood and excerpts from Sleeping Beauty Act III. Award-winning dancers include Jill May, John Stapleton, Leiland Charles, Noel Marsh, Marina Freydin, and Leigh Alexander at Reservoir High School, 1550 Scaggsville Road, Fulton. 2:30 p.m. and 7:30 p.m. All ages. Tickets are $15 for adults, $10 for seniors and children. Call 410-465-9414 or visit howardcountyballet.org.

Lazy River Duck Derby: Rent a $5 yellow rubber duck and send it down the new Lazy River. The three people with the fastest ducks will win prizes. A moon bounce, DJ, face painting, and food will be available for kids, and all money will be donated to the American Red Cross at the Valleybrook Country Club, 1810 Valleybrook Drive, Kingsville. 5 p.m.-8 p.m. All ages. Free. Call 410-803-2334, or visit valleybrookcc.net.

Maryland's Place in Space: Take part in hands-on science experiments and robotic demonstrations with real NASA astronauts and members of the Johns Hopkins University Applied Physics Laboratory. Sid the Science Kid, Stormin’ Bob Swanson, and Wall-E will also be in attendance at the Baltimore Convention Center, 1 W. Pratt St., 10 a.m.-4 p.m. All ages. Free. Call 301-286-7646, or visit nasa.gov/goddard.

Morning Canoe/Kayak Escape Relax on the cool waters between the Hanover Street Bridge and the Gwynns Falls area for around two hours amidst the sights of the downtown Baltimore skyline at the Middle Branch Park, 3301 Waterview Ave., 10 a.m. Ages 5 and up. Admission is $5. Call 410-396-0440 to make a reservation, or visit baltimorecity.gov/recnparks.

Sunday, May 31:

Goodnight Moon and The Runaway Bunny: These stories by Margaret Wise Brown will be portrayed by the Mermaid Theatre of Nova Scotia at 3 p.m. and 5 p.m. at the Olney Theatre Center. Tickets are $16; a $6 lap seat is available for children under 3 who do not require a separate seat.  Call the Box Office at 301-924-3400 or visit olneytheatre.org for tickets.

(Photo courtesy of the Olney Theatre Center)

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 6:18 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
Categories: Things to Do
        

We headed to James Beard country last night for a different take on the omelet. In the recently-released 60th anniversary edition of his Fireside Cookbook, the icon of American cuisine has a recipe for something called a "Fluffy Omelet."

I mean, what could sound more fun and kid-friendly than that?

Turns out, this omelet was actually a bit of a pain, at least compared to the regular kind. You have to have quick-cooking tapioca on hand; fortunately there was some in my pantry. You have to separate eggs, a task some will find onerous, and whip the egg whites. And beat the yolks to a thick yellow ribbon.

And bake the omelet after you have cooked it on the stove.

All that is to warn you that yes, there is a little fuss along with the fluff here. Still, we had dinner accomplished in less than an hour...

including some kid distractions. And they were intrigued enough with this that I would consider making it again.

As you can see, it does live up to its name.

Fluffy Omelet

Serves 4

2 tablespoons quick-cooking tapioca

3/4 teaspoon salt*

1/8 teaspoon pepper

3/4 cup milk

1 tablespoon butter

4 egg yolks

4 egg whites, stiffly beaten

Combine tapioca, salt, pepper, and milk in saucepan. Place over low or medium heat and cook until mixture comes to a boil, stirring constantly. Add butter. Remove from heat and allow to cool slightly (while beating eggs).

Beat egg yolks until thick and lemon-colored. Add milk mixture and mix well. Fold mixture into stiffly beaten egg whites. Turn into hot, buttered, 10-inch skillet and cook over low heat 3 minutes. Transfer to a moderate oven (350 degrees) and bake 15 minutes. The omelet is sufficiently cooked when a knife inserted comes out clean. Cut across at right angles to handle of pan, being careful not to cut all the way through. Fold carefully from handle to opposite side and serve on hot platter.

From "The Fireside Cookbook," by James Beard

Per serving: 144 calories, 9 grams fat, 8 grams protein, 5 grams saturated fat, 0 grams fiber, 8 grams carbohydrate, 224 milligrams cholesterol, 1,422 milligrams sodium. Analysis by registered dietitian Mary Mullen. 

*You'll notice this is pretty high in sodium. I don't think the omelet would suffer if the salt was reduced to 1/2 teaspoon, or even 1/4.

(Photo by me)

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 6:31 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)
Categories: Dinner Together, Food and Recipes
        

I'll be one of the Baltimore Sun bloggers and tweeters attending tonight's Baltimore Sun Tweet-Up from 6 p.m.-9 p.m. at the Windup Space in Station North. There will be drinks and door prizes, and a chance to meet your favorite (or least favorite) Sun reporters.

I know it's hard for moms and dads to get out, but really, what better excuse? After all, we'll be talking parenting as we sip our cocktails. As that other Kate says, it's all about the kids.

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 4:05 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)
Categories: On the Web
        

Last night John & Kate Plus 2 watched the first episode of the fifth season of Jon & Kate Plus 8.

Jon & Kate Plus 8 have a million-dollar home and so much fame that paparazzi trail them on family trips to Target.

John & Kate Plus 2 live in a modest 3-bedroom Colonial that is never as clean as Jon & Kate's fancy house. Trust me, no one wants to see John & Kate Plus 2 go to Target, because the camera crew will have to wait for hours while our two children choose which of the fine trinkets available in the dollar aisle they would like to take home. (They only get one each.)

Jon & Kate Plus 8 get tanning, tummy tucks and hair plugs. John & Kate Plus 2 -- at least the Kate in our couple -- could probably use that cosmetic help and more, but somehow, no one has offered it.

Do not feel sorry for John & Kate Plus 2, however. Today they are feeling far happier -- and luckier -- than they imagine Jon & Kate Plus 8 to be.

(Associated Press photo of Jon and Kate Gosselin)

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 1:29 PM | Permalink | Comments (75)
        

It's time again to give teacher gifts, a subject we've discussed a bit before. This year, I imagine the economy may factor in to some parents' decisions about what to give, and to which teachers.

We're looking for a Maryland teacher who might be getting an early gift this week to photograph. If you know of a gift presentation that fits the bill, please send me an e-mail.

Meanwhile, what are you giving your favorite teacher? Teachers, what are you hoping to get from parents and students?

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 12:44 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)
        

The sad story of former heavyweight champ Mike Tyson's 4-year-old daughter, Exodus, illustrates the dangers of treadmills for kids. Apparently her neck became trapped in the cord that hung from a treadmill console in her Phoenix home, and now she's on life support.

Children also have suffered friction burns from moving treadmills, even when parents are around -- they might, for example, reach for something under the equipment while it's in use, says the Consumer Reports blog.

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 11:07 AM | Permalink | Comments (6)
        

Liz Atwood is back with another Tween Tuesday:

Field days, field trips, concerts. This is a crazy time of year. I recently dashed out of work in time to attend my older son's band concert, but was disappointed to discover that my digital camera battery wasn't charged. In the next three weeks I'll be helping chaperone a field trip, taking the morning off to go to a end-of-the-year party and trying to squeeze in time to attend another concert. I'm debating whether to also help with field day because apparently the school desperately needs parent volunteers.

So what's a parent to do? We don't want to miss these moments in our kids' lives, but there's no question they play havoc with work schedules and child-care for younger siblings. How many of us have skipped work for a day or a few hours to watch our kids take the stage for 10 minutes? What's been your experience? How have your bosses responded?

Photo: Karl Merton Ferron, Baltimore Sun

Posted by Liz Atwood at 7:10 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)
        

Michelle, our contest winner, asked about feeding her 1-year-old daughter soy milk instead of cow's milk as she makes the transition from drinking formula.

Julie Yeh, a pediatrician at Greater Baltimore Medical Center, says it's OK. Here's her answer:

"It is traditionally recommended that infants are breastfed as long as possible, ideally until 1 year of age. When the time comes for the baby to be weaned off the breast, an iron-fortified formula is recommended until age 1. In an otherwise healthy infant, there is no advantage in using a soy-based formula vs. a cow's milk based formula.

"After 1 year of age, the recommendation is to introduce whole cow's milk. If there is a large concern for obesity or cardiovascular disease in either the infant or the family, then a low-fat milk can be substituted under the instruction of your pediatrician. If preferred, soy milk is a healthy alternative to cow's milk after 1 year of age and provides nearly equal amounts of calcium and is more iron rich.

"Soy milk is lower in fat content, which may be beneficial in those at risk for obesity. However, in infants in whom poor weight gain or nutrition is a concern, the use of soy milk under age 2 should be discussed with your doctor.

"Children who continue to demonstrate a cow's milk protein allergy after one year of age often do well with soy milk. Both whole milk and soy milk are not recommended under a year of age. After age 2, children can continue on either low fat cow's milk or soy milk. So, in this case, it is perfectly fine to use soy milk as an alternative to cow's milk, especially if there is adequate dairy intake through cheese and yogurt."

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 7:39 AM | Permalink | Comments (7)
Categories: The Monday Consult
        

Many pools in the area are opening today for the season, and the weather has obliged -- so far, at least. Have you hit the water yet?

Photo of preparations for opening at Meadowbrook Aquatic Center by Baltimore Sun photographer Jed Kirschbaum.

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 1:29 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)
Categories: Things to Do
        

If yesterday's list of events for this Memorial Day weekend wasn't enough for you, here's one more to tell you about: 

Make lollipop flowers, cereal necklaces, hybrid trail mix, and more meals with family and friends at Simon Kidgits Club Super Duper Mini Chefs event at Arundel Mills Mall. Later, decorate aprons and eat ice cream filled with the trail mix you created. Donations to the Maryland Food Bank are  welcome at the event, which is at the food court of Arundel Mills, 7000 Arundel Mills Circle, Hanover, from noon to 2 p.m. Ages 2-8. Free. Call 410-540-5100, or visit the Simon Kidgits Web site.

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 9:51 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)
Categories: Things to Do
        

Welcome Guest Dad Oren Miller, author of the local dad blog I recently discovered, A Blogger and a Father. Oren is a stay-at-home dad who says he lives in "beautiful Baltimore with my beautiful wife, two beautiful pit bulls, and one incredibly beautiful toddler."

His post covers a lot of ground, but I think it offers us a fun new voice that I hope we'll be hearing again.

Here's Oren: 

"So I got this email asking if I'd like to contribute to the Father's Day Friday feature as a guest blogger, and that's cool. Now comes the hard part. What to write about?

"I can make it a funny post, testing the boundaries by saying (and I'm speaking on behalf of all stay-at-home-dads) that Nina from the Sprout Channel is C-U-T-E. I can end the post with a funny, "Sprout, Please!"

"Or I can write about the way I'm learning from my son by experiencing for the second time things I've forgotten. Like standing transfixed for an hour and watching a caterpillar. For my 18-months-old boy the world is a constant source of wonder, and amusement, and disappointment, and joy, and sorrow, while for his father the world is this abstract he apathetically inhabits. And then I see him following the caterpillar and I remember curiosity. I see him say "Hi" to my neighbors, which is exactly one word more than I've ever said to them, and I remember the sense of community I'd felt as a boy, when the world was much smaller and made much more sense. When he doesn't want something he pushes it away, and when he does, he goes for it. There's a new lesson every day."

"Or I can write about a specific event in my boy's life, which would illustrate the way typical fathers deal with stuff. Like the time he fell off his crib straight on his head as an infant, and I picked him up and hugged him, even though I probably shouldn't have moved him. I was shaking. When the ambulance came, they told me he was fine. I apologized. They said my baby was so cute, I could call them any day.

"Or I can turn this into a rant against the companies that just don't get it. Like 1-800-Flowers, which used a "Mr. Mom" in a Mother's Day promotion. Or Playtex, which advertises a cup as "Designed for Mom," not for anything related to breastfeeding, but because it's durable and dishwasher safe. What, you think it's easy for me to tell people I stay at home? I didn't grow up like that, you know. My dad vacuumed the couches. That's all. He got my mom kitchen appliances for her birthdays. I don't need supposedly family-friendly corporations to burden me even more when I'm trying to redefine my self-identity, thank you.

"Or, I can thank Kate for her email and for the opportunity to write my guest post, and use this platform to wish all fathers an early Happy Father's Day. I've never worked so hard. I've never had a boss who yelled at me so much. But I've never had so much fun. Happy Father's Day."

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 6:45 AM | Permalink | Comments (5)
        

We don't plan much beyond the weekend ahead here at Charm City Moms, but over at Consuming Interests, there's a great list of opportunities to see free and cheap movies in the Baltimore area all summer long. Many of them are kid-friendly, and some are outside (and some are in the air-conditioned comfort, if you prefer, of libraries and theaters).

Print out the list and save it; I know I will.

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 2:28 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)
Categories: Movies
        

Jellies at the Aquarium and Chinasaurs at the Maryland Science Center are opening just in time for your long Memorial Day weekend, so you can feel good about stay-cationing. Also, Belvedere Square's Summer Sounds at the Square Friday night concerts have started.

Here's the rest of our list of fun things, which includes an event on Memorial Day. (For some outdoor activities to try over the holiday, check out our list of recommendations.) Thanks to Ethan Goldberg for helping compile it:

Thursday, May 21:

Anansi Spins His Web: Listen to a story from Anansi the Spider before creating webbed crafts of your own at the Cherry Hill Branch of the Enoch Pratt Free Library, 606 Cherry Hill Road, 4 p.m.-5:30 p.m. Ages 6-12. Free. Call 410-396-1168 to make a reservation, or visit prattlibrary.org.

Crafternoon: Create crafts based on your favorite stories at the Brooklyn Park Branch of the Anne Arundel County Public Library, 1 E. 11th Ave., at 3:45 p.m. For elementary school children. Free. Call 410-222-6260 to make a reservation, or visit aacpl.net.

Are You the Next Guitar Hero?: Play guitar with fellow enthusiasts at the Fallston branch of the Harford County Public Library, 1461 Fallston Road, Fallston, from 6:30 p.m.-7:45 p.m. Grades 3-5. Free. Call 410-638-3003 to make a reservation, or go to hcplonline.info.

Friday, May 22:

Little Shoots: Animal Moms & Babies:  Animals often know more than we think. Learn their secrets to parenting through hands-on activities, crafts, and a quick hike at the Nature Center of Patapsco Valley State Park, 1100 Hilton Avenue, Catonsville, 10:30 a.m.-11:30 a.m. Ages 2-4. Admission is $3. Call 410-461-5005, or visit dnr.state.md.us/publiclands/central/patapscovalley.html.

Sons of Pirates: Listen to a fusion of reggae and soft rock beach music while feasting on hot dogs, sandwiches, and more. The band will be playing at Belvedere Square, 518 E. Belvedere Ave., 6 p.m.-9 p.m. All ages. Free. Call 410-464-9773, or visit belvederesquare.com.

Here's what's going on the rest of the weekend:

Saturday, May 23:

"Cars" See the film for free at 2 p.m. at the Enoch Pratt Free Library, Wheeler Auditorium, 400 Cathedral St. All ages. Free. Call 410-396-5430, or visit prattlibrary.org.

Brew at the Zoo and Wine Too! Taste wine and food, listen to live music and visit the animals. Teddy Folkman, a finalist on Food Network’s "The Next Food Network Star" that premieres in June, will demonstrate how to cook with beer. Meanwhile, the Kid Zone will host an assortment of activities, like Sid the Science Kid and Wyatt of SuperWHY. At The Maryland Zoo in Baltimore, 1876 Mansion House Drive, Druid Hill Park, Saturday and Sunday, 1 p.m.-6 p.m. Admission is $45/$20 (under 21) for non-members, $30/$10 (under 21) for members. Call 410-396-7102, or visit marylandzoo.org.

Sunday, May 24:

24th Annual Sowebo Arts and Music Festival:  The event will include food, arts, music, and shows for kids. Three outdoor stages will host more than 20 musical groups, from Grace International Church to Skribe, at 1401 Hollins Street, noon-9 p.m. All ages. Free. Call 410-947-1710, or visit soweboarts.org.

Youth orchestra In his final concert after 12 years as conductor of the Greater Baltimore Youth Orchestra, Jason Love will lead the ensemble in Dvorak’s New World Symphony at 4 p.m. Sunday at the Joseph Meyerhoff Symphony Hall, 1212 Cathedral St. Tickets are $5 and $15 through the Web site or $10-$20 at the door. Go to gbyo.com.

Chagall for Children Hone your ability to appreciate and express art through an interactive exhibit of 14 reproductions from Marc Chagall. Activities include creating mosaics, tapestries, computerized paintings, symphonies, and video compositions. Stations will accompany many of Chagall’s most famous works, like “Flowers” and “The Rooster,” at Port Discovery, 35 Market Place, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Ages 2-10. Admission is $11.75. Call 410-727-8120, or visit portdiscovery.org.

Monday, May 25 (Memorial Day):

National Tap Dance Day: Professional dancers will showcase their skills in classical, modern, and hip-hop at the Baltimore Inner Harbor, West Shore Park, located at Light and Conway streets near the Visitor Center and the Maryland Science Center, noon-1:30 p.m. Hosted by Dance Baltimore, the Baltimore Office of Promotion & The Arts, and the Waterfront Partnership of Baltimore. All ages. Free. Visit dancebaltimore.org.

Jellies exhibit photo by Baltimore Sun photographer Amy Davis

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 6:54 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
Categories: Things to Do
        

If you're curious about gadgets and programs designed to make it easier to find your child if he or she is missing, you may want to know about a free safety conference sponsored by Amber Ready (which makes a system for parents to store children's profiles in wireless phones) next Wednesday (May 27). The Amber Ready system will be demonstrated, and an Internet safety consultant will talk about how families can safely navigate technology.

The seminar will be held from  at the Crowne Plaza Baltimore, 2004 Greenspring Dr. in Timonium. To attend, call 866-985-0138.

Updated May 22: I'm told the time for this event has been changed to 6 p.m. for registration, 7 p.m.-9 p.m. for the program, which is to include free dinner.

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 2:59 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)
        

Michelle, for her interesting question about soy milk for 1-year-olds.

Look for an answer in an upcoming Monday Consult. And thanks to all for your questions, which I hope to get answers for soon as well.

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 10:51 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
        

This week, I've returned to the somewhat-winning formula of simple protein with a subtle sauce for our Dinner Together. This recipe from WomenHeart's All Heart Family Cookbook promised a healthful nutritional profile, with no saturated fat and fewer than 200 calories per serving.

While the title of the recipe calls for halibut, you can substitute any thick-fleshed white fish. We used mahi-mahi, since we found that in the freezer aisle at our local supermarket. (For us, individually-frozen fillets of fish work best for weeknight dinners. We put the servings we want to defrost in the fridge on the morning we want to serve them, and they're ready to cook by dinnertime.)

My kids gave this a split verdict. Sam liked it; Leah didn't. My husband and I enjoyed it, but thought the hoisin flavor could have been more pronounced. Next time, I might add a bit more.

Here's the recipe:

Hoisin Halibut with Bok Choy

Serves 4

2 tablespoons hoisin sauce (see note above)

1 tablespoon orange juice

4 halibut fillets (5 ounces each), skinned

4 heads baby bok choy, halved

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees. Coat a baking sheet with sides (jelly-roll pan) with cooking spray.

In a small bowl, stir together the hoisin sauce and orange juice. Place the halibut and bok choy on the prepared baking sheet. Brush both with the glaze. Bake for 10 minutes, or until the fish flakes easily when tested with a fork.

Recipe and analysis from "WomenHeart's All Heart Family Cookbook," by Kathy Kastan and Susan Banfield.

Per serving: 199 calories, 3 grams fat, 0 grams saturated fat, 45 milligrams cholesterol, 440 milligrams sodium, 14 grams carbohydrate, 3 grams fiber, 32 grams protein.

(Photo by me)

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 6:13 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
        

It's time to replenish our stock of good parenting questions for the Monday Consult, and that means it's also time to win something. This time I'm offering a copy of The America's Test Kitchen Family Baking Book, which has more than 700 recipes to make with the family. (Including, I can attest, a foolproof method for making Rice Krispies treats.)

To enter, all you have to do is leave a question that an expert might be able to answer about parenting in the comments. (Here are some examples.) I'll pick a winner at random and announce the lucky commenter tomorrow morning.

If you'd like to be included in the contest, just be sure to leave a valid e-mail address on the comment form. That won't be published, but I will need it to reach you and get your new baking book to you.

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 10:23 AM | Permalink | Comments (6)
        

Here's Liz Atwood with Tween Tuesday: 

I went to church on Mother’s Day and enjoyed hearing all the nice things the minister had to say about moms. But one thing he said got me wondering if I’m really such a good mom after all.

He told the story of how a mother goose protects her goslings, defending them from all danger. Drawing the comparison to human moms, he talked of mothers who defend their children no matter what.

I’d like to think I would lay down my life for my children, but when it comes to defending them when they may be wrong, I’m afraid I don’t pass the best mom test.

Take for example parent-teacher conferences. I have a great respect for the job teachers do and if my children make bad grades, I am more likely to assume that they haven’t done the work they needed to do rather than fault the teacher for not doing a good enough job teaching. Or take altercations with other kids. While I note that the other kids may be at fault, I raise the possibility that my sons have done something to contribute to the problem. I ask them to examine their own words and actions to see whether they might be to blame.

Now I’m wondering if I should be a stronger advocate for my children. After all, if mom doesn’t have your back, who does?

How do you handle these situations when your child runs into conflict? Is your instinct like that of the mother goose to rush to defend her young? Or are you more like an impartial judge, trying to determine who is at fault and mete out the punishment accordingly?

Photo: Statue in Virginia City, Nev. Courtesy AP.

Posted by Liz Atwood at 6:10 AM | Permalink | Comments (5)
Categories: Teens
        

CBS News, which has started a project called "Children and the Recession" to examine the effects of the economic meltdown on our children, has some interesting data. They report:

--In the last six months, 60 percent of about 1,000 parents polled by the network said they've had to tell their children they may not have the money to do at least some of the things the family used to do.

--About 1 in 10 of the parents said they had delayed taking their children for some type of medical treatment within the past six months because of the recession. Here's more:

Meanwhile, I'm looking at the flip side of this story. I'm looking for kids and families who have shown incredible resilience during these hard times. When told that a parent lost a job, has a child you know responded in a very positive way -- offering to get a summer job, coming up with ideas for trimming the family budget, helping the job-seeking parent get computer savvy? If so, and if that family is in Central Maryland, I'd like to interview them. Please e-mail or call me (410-332-6753) to get in touch.

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 10:03 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
Categories: Work-life balance
        

Since Memorial Day is coming up next weekend and swine flu is still on some of our minds, I thought I'd use some tips from the Mommy Docs for today's Consult.

They recommend that before you travel or even head to the beach with kids, you pack these three things:

--Hand sanitizer will help your kids keep their hands clean when there's no sink handy, the Docs say. But if it's available, scrubbing for at least 20 seconds with water and soap is the best way to clean your hands.

--Thermometer. The Docs say temperatures should always be taken rectally with a digital thermometer for infants under 3 months. For older kids, they recommend the Braun ThermoScan ear thermometer, which they say is very quick.

--Nasal aspirator. That's the little blue bulb that often comes home from the hospital with new moms. Keep it handy; babies have a hard time clearing their own noses and can use its gentle help, say the Docs. I've found it can help older children, too.

Have we left anything out that you find indispensable for travel?

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 6:45 AM | Permalink | Comments (3)
Categories: The Monday Consult
        

Mothers and fathers have an inspiring story to tell their daughters about Rachel Alexandra, the first filly to win the Preakness in 85 years.

Then again, some savvy girls might not be inspired, but discouraged that it's taken that long for a filly to come out on top.

My daughter would be one of those. I remember the time that we had to call 911 because my little son's knee was stuck in a playground staircase. A wonderful team of about 10 firefighters responded, including one woman.

After Sam was safely extricated and we were on our way home, I triumphantly told Leah, who was then about 5: "See, ladies can be firefighters, too."

"But Mommy," she replied, "why was there only one?"

(Photo by Baltimore Sun photographer Karl Merton Ferron)

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 8:37 AM | Permalink | Comments (12)
        

Joe Burris is back, with an observation about a texting hazard for tweens and teens that doesn't involve driving:

"Lately I've come to notice an unusual behavior among tweens and teens, one that I'm surprised hasn't resulted in a spike in collision-related bumps and bruises. Thus far, I haven't come across a word that describes the practice. For now, I'll call it walking while texting, and it seems to be contagious with today's youth.

"Walking while texting is when kids walk (some briskly, some slowly) while holding an iPod, cell phone or other hand-held device to their face, pressing little buttons with their thumbs.

"My 12-year-old daughter Nyaniso walks while texting sometimes in our house; when we're out walking, we store the gadgets. Many of her friends walk while texting. Often I see kids doing it while traveling with adults or while slowly inching forward in a fast food line. I see them doing it while entering or exiting elevators, climbing out of cars, coming off buses.

"Never mind the fact that it's difficult having a conversation with someone who's fixated on a tiny digital screen. What I don't see, to my surprise, is much incidental contact; by now young foreheads all over creation should be filled with protruding knots, the result of not watching where one's going. Instead, kids manage to get around without the occasional collisions.

"Still, I believe we need to advise caution about the practice in the same manner that Nintendo Wii users were warned about the dangers of gripping the remote control too lightly while attempting a tennis backhand. The result could be disastrous."

(AP Photo/Matt Sayles)

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 6:50 AM | Permalink | Comments (4)
        

Two opportunities are coming up for your kids to develop their talents for performing:

--The new Handel Children's Choir of Baltimore is holding auditions for new members ages 7-17, for the 2009-2010 season. Chairwoman Nicole Schultheis writes: "We give children an opportunity to learn and share classical, multicultural, contemporary and folk music. During the season we rehearse Mondays after school at First English Lutheran Church, 39^th and Charles. Partial scholarships may be available. For more info call 410-753-2958."

(Photo courtesy of the new Handel Children's Choir of Baltimore) 

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 3:00 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)
        

It's Preakness weekend, which means there's a parade (on Friday) that the kids might enjoy, if they can stay up late enough.

For something completely different, check out the Y's free Family Fun Night in Westminster Saturday.

Here's more family fun for the weekend, with help from intern Ethan Goldberg:

Thursday, May 14:

Nature Storytime: Listen to stories and create crafts at Eden Mill Nature Center, 1617 Eden Mill Road, Pylesville, 21132, 11 a.m.- noon. Families are welcome to bring food or blankets for a picnic lunch after the program. All ages. Free. Call 410-836-3050, or visit edenmill.org.

Friday, May 15:

Rainbow Theatre: Watch Bob Brown’s puppets in the "Magic Toy Shop." "Fun with Pam" and "Rascal" by Pam Kindersinger will follow, for a combined mix of puppetry, songs, storytelling, and humor at Slayton House, 10400 Cross Fox Lane, Columbia, 21044. 10 a.m. Ages 2-5. Admission is $5 in advance, $6 at the door. Call 410-730-3987, or visit columbiavillages.org/wildelake.

Preakness Parade of Lights: See floats, bands, giant balloons, equestrian units, and special guests in this diverse parade. Guests include Daniel Wilcox, Grand Marshal Stacy Keibler, Girl Scouts of Central Maryland, and more Baltimore celebrities and musical groups. Downtown at Pratt Street, from Howard Street to Market Place, 8:30 p.m. Call 877-225-8466, or visit promotionandarts.com.

On Saturday...

Saturday, May 16:

Birding Hike at Patapsco Valley State Park: Journey through Soldier’s Delight, a natural environment, in search of birds. While the hike may be relatively easy, sturdy shoes and a willingness to get a little muddy are necessary. Bring binoculars if possible to Soldiers Delight, Owings Mills, 8-11 a.m. Ages 12-up. Admission is $2. Call 410-461-5005.

Who Dunnit? Day: Train to become a junior detective by investigating the disappearance of a reel of IMAX film. Learn valuable lessons in fingerprint identification, cryptology, clue interpretation, and the function of dogs in crime with the Mid-Atlantic D.O.G.S. search and rescue team. The event will be held at the Maryland Science Center, 601 Light St., from noon-4 p.m. Free with paid admission to the museum. Call 410-685-5225 or visit marylandsciencecenter.org.

Family Fun Night: Join the Y for a night with your family and the local community. Open facilities include the gym, pool, a fitness class, and many games. Healthy food and giveaways will be provided at the Carroll County Family Center Y, 1719 Sykesville Road, Westminster, 6 p.m.-9 p.m. Admission is free. Call 410-848-3660 or visit ymaryland.org.

Sunday, May 17:

Vintage Baseball Day, Kids Club Sundae Sunday and Bark In The Park: Travel to the 1860s era of baseball with old-fashioned rules and equipment as the Chesapeake and Potomac Baseball Club hosts a three-inning pre-game production. Afterwards, pig out with a sundae bar buffet at Bowie Baysox, 4101 N.E. Crain Highway. Bowie. Exhibition starts at 12:30 p.m; 2:05 p.m. for the game and sundaes. Admission is $15 for the sundaes and a reserved ticket to the game. Call 301-464-4871 before Friday at 5 p.m. for tickets, or visit baysox.com.

Cinderella: See Carol Bartlett’s dance rendition of Cinderella at 1 p.m. and 4 p.m. at the Peabody Institute, Johns Hopkins University, Miriam A. Friedberg Concert Hall, 1 East Mount Vernon Place.  Admission is $7. Call 410-659-8100 ext. 1125 for tickets, or go to peabody.jhu.edu.

Photo of the 2006 Preakness parade by Baltimore Sun photographer Chiaki Kawajiri

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 6:31 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
Categories: Things to Do
        

Have you heard that the FDA has warned the makers of Cheerios that the cholesterol-lowering claims on its box are appropriate only for FDA-approved drugs?

General Mills responds that the FDA's quarrel is with the way the claims appear on its box, not the science behind them.

Anyway, if Cheerios is really a drug, I hope the feds aren't coming to my house. Or, probably, yours. Not only were Cheerios among the first foods my kids learned to eat as babies -- those little Os are aces for developing that pincer grip -- but my son still munches on the Honey Nut version most mornings. 

AP Photo/Lisa Poole

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 11:00 AM | Permalink | Comments (10)
Categories: Food and Recipes
        

This Dinner Together is almost like cheating, because it's one I know my kids not only like, but love. Everyone in my family loves my dad's blintzes.

Because I traveled with my daughter to hear my father conduct a concert in Kansas City over Mother's Day weekend, I demanded was treated to these delicious stuffed crepes for breakfast. But they could easily make a celebration dinner. Hey, if you can have pancakes for dinner, why not blintzes?

The great thing about these, besides the fact that they taste terrific and are easy, is that kids love to help make them. I was the roller of the blintzes when I was a kid. That made for lots of fun mornings with my father, who would flip the crepes onto a pan for me to fill with cheese, fold and roll.

Now my daughter is the roller, and she has a great time with her grandfather...

Dad typically doubles or triples the recipe, because we can never get enough of these. Note: you may have cheese left over, depending on the size of your pancakes and how much you put in them. If you have a lot left over, just make another round of pancakes to go with. As I say, you can never have enough.

Merton's Blintzes

Makes 20

Blintz batter:

3 eggs

1 cup milk

2 tablespoons cooking oil

¾ cup flour

Filling:

1 1/2 to 2 cups cottage cheese

1 tablespoon melted butter

1 egg yolk

For blintz batter: blend eggs, milk and oil. Fold in flour. (Dad uses an eggbeater to finish the batter.) Drain the cottage cheese for the filling, then combine with the other filling ingredients.

Cook the batter into pancakes on one side on a griddle, making them oblong. Place on a clean surface to fill, with cooked side up. Place some filling in the center (a tablespoonful or two should do it) and roll the pancake up into a cylinder about finger length long. Place blintzes on a cooking pan. Set oven to broil. Cook on highest rack until brown (just a few minutes; watch carefully).

Serve with applesauce, sour cream, syrup, and/or sausages as you like.

Adapted by Merton Shatzkin from "The Art of Jewish Cooking," by Jennie Grossinger.

Per blintz, without garnishes: 73 calories, 5 grams protein, 4 grams fat, 1 gram saturated fat, 5 grams carbohydrate, 0 grams fiber, 47 milligrams cholesterol, 91 milligrams sodium. Analysis by registered dietitian Jodie Shield.

(Photo by me)

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 6:33 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)
Categories: Dinner Together, Food and Recipes
        

Good news to report on the Stadium Place playground front.

You may recall my post a month or so ago about the effort to rebuild this Waverly playground, which burned to the ground last fall after the community worked so hard to put it up in the first place. There was a call for volunteers to restore the castle-style playground to its former glory, with a big work session that culminated last weekend.

How did it go? Marisa Canino, who helps publicize the effort, says that thanks to all the volunteers, the new playground is "about 99% complete, which is exactly where we wanted to be.  There is a short list of items that needs to be completed which we'll work on over the coming few days." If all goes well, the playground should be able to open shortly after Memorial Day, though a date has not been finalized, she said.

Did you take part in the rebuilding effort? I'd love to hear more.

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 1:20 PM | Permalink | Comments (5)
        

Consuming Interests has details on a free Haagen-Dazs offer this afternoon and evening, to highlight the plight of disappearing honeybees.

This is the perfect offer for the modern parent -- the opportunity to educate your child on the environment cancels out the guilt over feeding him ice cream. Or so you might be able to tell yourself...

(Photo by Nancy Stone/Chicago Tribune)

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 11:07 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
        

Here’s a question I bet many tween parents have asked: Does my kid really need braces?

When my older son was 9, the dentist referred him to an orthodontist who prescribed a night brace and retainer, and left open the possibility of braces once his permanent teeth erupted. I remember that first night with the brace, how pitiful my son looked – like the child Willy Wonka suffering under his evil dentist Dad.

He wore the night brace for six months or so, but he kept the retainer for a year. To his credit, he managed not to lose it, although I know some parents who had to go trash diving in the school cafeteria looking for discarded retainers.

 During the time my son wore the retainer, I came to realize that orthodontics is an inexact science. As his teeth grew and evolved, so did the doctor’s advice. Over time, we moved from the medically necessary to the cosmetically desirable. It was at that point we decided to delay further treatment. My son was satisfied with his look, the family dentist was satisfied with his bite, and I was happy we didn’t have to pay thousands of dollars more for braces. The only one who wasn’t happy with this arrangement was the orthodontist, who seemed bewildered that we didn’t want to continue treatment.

Now my younger son is 8. I notice he is developing the same overbite his big brother had. I’m sure that we’ll be back at the orthodontist soon. And I’m sure we’ll be having the same discussion again.

As parents, we naturally want the best for our kids, but at what point is good, good enough? Have you had to make this decision with braces?

Photo: Courtesy of South Florida Sun-Sentinel

Posted by Liz Atwood at 6:00 AM | Permalink | Comments (5)
        

Recently, Jim wrote:

My 6-year-old daughter is very outgoing with small groups of friends. However, put her in a situation with a larger group, even w/friends, and she gets shy to the point of tears.

For example, after dropping her off at a recent birthday party, with all friends she knew, she became completely overwhelmed. I had to come back with her stuffed bunny and spend a few moments helping her work her way back into the group.

By the end she had fun but never warmed up completely.

My wife finds this very concerning. We want to find activities for her this summer (day camp, etc) but past experiences have not worked as she clings to the counselor or won't even get out of the car?

Suggestions?

I asked Brad Sachs, a Columbia psychologist who recently gave us advice on how to tell your kids you've been laid off, to tackle this one. Here's his answer:

"Our culture places a very strong emphasis on social skills and the capacity to effectively engage with others. However, not every child is likely to develop these skills and capacities at the same rate and to the same extent, nor is it necessarily important that all children do so.

"After all, we know that some of us are more extroverted and thrive on connecting with as many individuals as possible, while others of us are more introverted and thrive on solitude and introspection.

"Based on what you are telling me about your daughter, and the fact that she is only 6 years old, I don’t believe that there is anything to worry about. The fact that she connects well with her small group of friends suggests that she has already developed a high level of social agility. The fact that she gets anxious in a larger group probably means that she becomes over-stimulated by all of the interaction, and is simply not able to process all that is going on around her. It’s as if her social wiring gets overloaded as a result of all of the interaction and she winds up short-circuiting into shyness and tearfulness, unable to handle all of the "charge" that is building up. On the other hand, the fact that she was able, with some parental support, to return to the recent birthday party, even though she wasn’t completely relaxed, is, from my perspective, a very good sign.

"It would be easy to imagine that as she gets older, she will gradually become better able to navigate between small groups and large groups. Until then, it’s best to be patient with her, and slowly nurture her social self-confidence.

"With this in mind, at this stage in her development I would select camps that are likely to have smaller groups of campers and low staff-to-camper ratios. When it comes to large-group activities, such as birthday parties, I would do exactly what you’ve done, which is to initially give her the opportunity to manage on her own, and, if she can’t, to make yourself available to her so that she can re-settle herself and feel less overwhelmed. If she is going to engage in any extra-curricular activities or programs, I would also select those that have small group or class sizes.

"And I would be sure to talk to her both before and after challenging events in an effort to help her become more self-assured. Prior to an event, for example, you might ask her to predict how well she thinks it’ll go, on a scale of 1-10, and join in with a prediction of your own. Afterwards, you can ask her to evaluate how it went, on that same 1-10 scale, and see who made the closest prediction. Being "playful" about some of her nervousness and insecurity will probably take the edge off of it, and provide her with more balance and perspective.

"Finally, be sure to let her know that you love her, and to regularly take note of all of her strengths and assets, both in and out of the social realm. You don’t want her sense of self-respect or self-esteem to rotate exclusively on the axis of being 'the life of the party"—even if she never turns out to be comfortable in large groups, she deserves to feel good about who she is, and about the meaningful peer relationships, however many, that she does learn to enjoy and cultivate."

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 6:20 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
Categories: The Monday Consult
        

Happy Mother's Day! I'm hoping you're all still asleep, but I wanted to see how you're doing on our special day. And to give you a few links for thought:

--Don't miss our story this morning on enterprising moms who stay home while running their own businesses. In this economy, that option is becoming more important to lots of families. These local moms, some of whom you may know, talk about the benefits and pitfalls.

--Kevin Cowherd writes about a survey in which adult children overwhelmingly picked Mom over Dad as the parent they'd prefer to have move in with them if necessary.

--And garden maven Susan Reimer says no thanks to a "budget-friendly," "fragrance-free" flower being touted as a Mother's Day gift.

What did you get for Mother's Day? I'm having a fantastic morning already at my father's house, where my daughter and I have traveled this weekend to see him conduct a concert. The concert went off beautifully last night, and now my dad and my daughter are making me Dad's famous blintzes.

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 8:58 AM | Permalink | Comments (4)
        

From the shameless plug department: Charm City Moms has been nominated as best local blog in the Baltimore category of Nickelodeon's Parents' Picks. Now it's up to you and all your friends to vote for us, and to spread the word.

You can vote once a day through July 15. So, as they say, please vote early and often if you like what you see here. And thanks for being part of our community.

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 6:52 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
        

I understand that our partner, WJZ-TV, is running a story about Orioles third baseman Melvin Mora and his quintuplets tonight. Mora and his wife, Gisel, conceived the children after she had fertility treatments. They're now in second grade. The Moras also have an older daughter.

The WJZ piece will look at the busy routine this family has to keep up with Jada, Genesis, Rebecca, Christian and Matthew. Their older sister Tatiana apparently helps the quints with their homework. 

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 3:30 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)
Categories: Sports
        

I admit that I am not always the most current on celeb news; my time for glancing through People is limited to bleary-eyed 5:30 a.m. sessions at the gym. So maybe I'm the only one who was surprised to see that Chyler Leigh, who plays Lexie Grey on Grey's Anatomy, has given birth to her third child.

Yes, her third. She's 27 and has been married for about seven years already. She also has a 5-year-old boy and a 2-year-old girl.

Makes the story line about protecting "Little Grey" from the likes of Dr. McSteamy seem kind of quaint, doesn't it?

Associated Press photo/Evan Agostini, 2007

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 1:48 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)
        

Yesterday Michelle Obama delivered a speech on work-life balance, a topic she has said would be an important priority for her as First Lady. The Moms To Work blog has a transcript. 

Obama acknowledged that one income often can't support a family any more; that even if one parent wants to stay home, both often must work. She talked about the need, even in these times when all of us fear for our jobs, for companies to create greater flexibility to hold on to talented employees. Even if it's something as simple as helping them get out to pick up their children at school.

And she pointed out that many companies are a long way from that -- that many don't even provide their workers with paid sick days, leaving working parents with terrible choices when their children are ill.

What do you think about what she said? Are we likely to see these hopes realized any time soon?

AP Photo/J. Scott Applewhite

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 9:19 AM | Permalink | Comments (5)
Categories: Work-life balance
        

Today I have the pleasure of telling you that reporter Joe Burris, who wrote last week about the perils of mall play spaces, will be an even more frequent regular on Guest Dad day. He's taking on a new role reporting on family life, too, so please send him story tips and ideas.

Joe has a parenting success to tell you about -- his daughter is finally sleeping through the night.

That wouldn't be a big deal, except that she's 3. Years old, not months.

Here's his story:

When I look back on my accomplishments for this year, one will immediately come to mind, likely as my proudest: My wife Mpho and I finally got our 3-year-old daughter Onalenna to sleep through the night after countless failed attempts.

I cannot begin to convey what a feat this is.

For nearly two and a half years, our daughter did not sleep longer than four hours overnight. No matter what time we put her to bed, no matter what adjustments we made to her room, to her diet, to her sleep routine, or anything else, she would wake up repeatedly, almost like clockwork.

The first awakening would usually be right after 11 p.m. Then around 1 a.m., then 3 a.m. She would finally sleep soundly around 5:30 a.m. -- or about the time my wife and I would wake up to get our day started.

Several nights, she woke up every 40 minutes or so. The source of the problem? Who knows?

Once, she told me there was a monster in her room.

"What does he look like, Sweetie?" I asked.

"She is yellow."

Then another "monster" showed up, one with a familiar name: Spiderman.

She implored me to seek and destroy Spiderman. Gladly, I said, only to discover that this Spiderman wasn't the Marvel Comics character. It was an animal on a painting she saw at her grandparent's house. In South Africa.

To say I've been walking around like a physically drained zombie for nearly three years is an understatement. And I shuddered at what the lack of sleep was doing to my daughter physically, in addition to making her cranky.

What finally worked was a regimen similar to the Ferber method: We would go through our nighttime ritual, kiss her good night, then leave the room. Then we would return five minutes later, assuring her she is not alone in the house. Then we'd leave and return 10 minutes, then 20, then 40. She ultimately began routinely situating herself in the bed for comfortable sleep, and resituating herself during the night when she awoke.

And that did it.

She occasionally has a sleepless night, but nothing like what were accustomed to.

I never knew how important a good night's rest was before the past few weeks. Now I value my sleep like priceless treasure.

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 6:35 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
Categories: Father's Day Tuesday
        

Here's our weekly guide to the weekend, with Mother's Day an obvious theme this time around. There's something for moms who prefer the sedate (Ladew Topiary Gardens, the Walters) and the possibly raucous (Urban Pirates).

Thanks to Lindsey Citron for her contributions: 

Thursday, May 7:

"Mother Said: A Momplicated Relationship" Siobhan Kolker and Elizabeth Hart perform songs about mothers and daughters at 7:30 p.m. in the cabaret at Germano’s restaurant, 300 S. High St. $10 plus food and drink minimum. Call 410-752-4515 or visit germanostrattoria.com.

Mother’s Day Crafts Kids can make a card, piece of jewelry or another craft to show moms they care at the Govans branch of the Enoch Pratt Free Library, 5714 Bellona Ave., at 4 p.m. Ages 6-12. Free. Visit prattlibrary.org or call 410-396-6098.

Friday, May 8:

Music for Moms Celebrate Mother’s Day with fun songs made for moms, 11:30 a.m. Friday at the Enoch Pratt Free Library Central Branch, 400 Cathedral St. For kids ages 3-5 and their parents. Free. Visit prattlibrary.org or call 410-396-5430.

Mother and Child Tea Have a tea party, read books, play games and enjoy snacks with Mom in honor of Mother’s Day at noon at the Howard County Library, Savage Branch, 9525 Durness Lane, Laurel. Ages 5 and up with adult. Free. Registration required. Call 410-880-5978 or visit hclibrary.org.

And more...

Saturday, May 9:

Mother’s Day weekend Head to Ladew Topiary Gardens, 3535 Jarrettsville Pike, Monkton, 10:30 a.m.-5 p.m. Saturday and Sunday for complimentary coffee and tea and a free gift for mothers, while supplies last. Admission is $10 for adults; $8 for seniors and students; and $2 for children 12 and younger. Call 410-557-9466 or go to ladewgardens.com.

Downtown Baltimore Family Alliance Kids' Spaces House Tour Get a walking tour of some of the most creative kids' rooms and nurseries in Federal Hill. All proceeds benefit the Downtown Baltimore Family Alliance. Start at Spoons Coffee Cafe, 24 E. Cross St., Baltimore, 10 a.m.-3 p.m., Adults only; no children or strollers unless infants can be carried by parents. DBFA members- $20 (advance), Non-members-$25 (advance), at the door - $30. Advance purchase strongly recommended. Visit dbfam.org.

‘A Tribute to Mothers’ A concert in honor of dear ol’ Mom, featuring Yolanda Adams, Marvin Sapp and Kirk Franklin, takes place at 6 p.m. at 1st Mariner Arena, 201 W. Baltimore St. $44.50-$51.50. Call 410-547-7328 or go to ticketmaster.com.

Sunday, May 10:

Women in art In honor of Mother’s Day, the Walters Art Museum, 600 N. Charles St., is conducting a guided tour of its collection entitled "Celebrating Women in Art," highlighting paintings and sculptures that depict the roles of women from ancient times through the 19th century. Tour starts at 2 p.m. Sunday, May 10,. Free. Call 410-547-9000 or go to thewalters.org.

Urban Pirates Mother's Day Special: Give mom a free pirate-ship ride with Urban Pirates at Ann Street Pier all day. All ages, Free for moms; $20 for passengers 3 and up, $10 for under 3. Reservations required. Call 410-32-QUEST or visit urbanpirates.us.

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 6:34 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
Categories: Things to Do
        

Judith Warner, who writes the Domestic Disturbances column for the New York Times, will be speaking at Park School tonight at 7:30 p.m. Admission is free.

I met Judith several years ago on a fellowship for family reporters sponsored by the Journalism Center at the University of Maryland. I'm sure it'll be an interesting discussion, so I'm planning to tweet from it; you can follow that on my Twitter page tonight.

If you're there, too, and you spot me in the crowd, please introduce yourself. I'm always eager to meet readers in person.

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 5:11 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)
        

Debbie Phelps, mother of Michael Phelps and author of a new book, answered a few questions for my colleague Susan Reimer today. Among the answers was what she expected from her gold-medal-winning son for Mother's Day.

"A hug and a kiss. He's not really the flower type," she told Susan.

C'mon, Mrs. Phelps; you've done a lot for this young man. If you can't get more out of him, where does that leave the rest of us?

Associated Press photo/Rob Carr

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 2:35 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)
        

Jessica of A Parent in Silver Spring challenged me to give my list of five things I love about being a mom the other day. It's an attempt to start a "world tour" conversation among mom bloggers, hosted at Her Bad Mother.

At first my reaction was that this was a terrible week for me to list my favorite things about being a mom, because not only are things getting all shifted around at work (a development that should ultimately be exciting for you readers, as I'm able to focus even more on the subject of parenting), but I have once again signed up for too many volunteer responsibilities at church and school. Did I mention that I'm getting ready to go out of town, too?

And yet, it's the perfect time to say why I love being a mom. Because despite all of those obligations that stem from trying to feed, nurture and run a family, I wouldn't have it any other way.

Here's why:

1) I've done something great. I may never live up to the lofty career goals I once set for myself, but it doesn't really matter. I can die happy knowing I've accomplished something in bringing the world two great kids.

2) I get to be a kid again. I have permission to make up imaginary characters, talk like Elmo, dance like a fool, give "airplane" rides, and bake cookies any time, just because.

3) I get to feel things deeply. This isn't always good -- you never feel worse than when your child is really sad, or more worried than when your child might be seriously sick or hurt. But fortunately, it's the flip side I experience most: being moved by a kid's big laugh, or absurdly proud when he or she says something very grown up. Yes, things I wouldn't even notice in somebody else's child.

4) Motherhood makes me tough. I don't want the kids to see me cry, so often I just don't. (If I must, that's what the bathroom is for.) I can care for them when I'm sick and exhausted, stay calm when I want to scream, keep smiling and playing with their feet when planes crash into the World Trade Center.

5) Motherhood makes me organized. OK, I'll never be nearly as organized as I'd like to be, but it really is true that if you want to get something done, give it to a busy person. I've learned to multitask with the best of them, and it's an aspect of being a mom that has actually helped me in the workplace. I get things done faster and more efficiently because I have greater incentive than ever to get home at a decent hour.

That's my list. What's yours?

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 10:15 AM | Permalink | Comments (3)
        

This is a favorite recipe of mine from several years ago, when I reviewed the American Dietetic Association cookbook "Cooking Healthy Across America" for the Taste section. It occurred to me that I hadn't made it in a long time, and that the kids hadn't tried it.

This recipe has a much better nutritional profile than real fried chicken because it's soaked in buttermilk, coated in wheat germ, parmesan and spices, and baked. It's not a super-crispy coating in the end, but the treatment makes for a tender piece of chicken.

The kids took well to this one, so I see some bulk packages of chicken thighs in our future. Here's the recipe:

Oven "Fried" Chicken

Serves 8

vegetable oil cooking spray

1/3 grated parmesan cheese

1/2 cup wheat germ

1/2 teaspoon dried rosemary leaves, crushed

1/2 teaspoon onion powder

1/2 teaspoon garlic salt

1/4 teaspoon dried thyme

1/8 teaspoon ground black pepper

3/4 cup buttermilk

8 skinless chicken thighs, rinsed and dried

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Spray a baking sheet with the cooking spray.

Combine the parmesan, wheat germ, rosemary, onion powder, garlic salt, thyme and pepper in a shallow bowl; set aside. Pour the buttermilk in a separate shallow bowl.

Dip the chicken in the buttermilk, then roll in the wheat germ mixture and place on a baking sheet. Bake for 50 minutes or until tender.

Adapted from "Cooking Healthy Across America" by the American Dietetic Association. Analysis by registered dietitian Jodie Shield.

Per serving: 163 calories, 18 grams protein, 8 grams fat, 2 grams saturated fat, 5 grams carbohydrate, 2 grams fiber, 53 milligrams cholesterol, 182 milligrams sodium

(Photo by me)

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 6:30 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)
        

The local meal assembly company Let's Dish is again offering new mothers a free dish (or half-dish, as they call it, that serves 2-3 people) today through May 23.

Any mom who's given birth to or adopted a baby since Mother's Day 2008 is eligible. Bring proof of the birth or adoption and a valid e-mail address to your meal-making session, which you can sign up for at the Let's Dish site.

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 9:42 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
Categories: Food and Recipes
        

Here's Liz Atwood with Tween Tuesday: 

Like many parents these days, I've had a recent change in my job. Among other things, that means having to rethink child care for my kids. My 12 year old is old enough to stay by himself at home for a couple hours, but what about my younger son, who just turned 8?

A recent report on National Public Radio points out there is no one answer to the question of when kids are old enough to stay home alone.  Maryland is one of just a handful of states that have laws about when kids can be left alone and here a child must be at least 8. But surveys show most parents, including myself, don’t feel comfortable leaving children that young home by themselves.

Experts say it is wise to start with small increments of time – a half hour or so—and see how the kids do. And before leaving a child alone, parents should review basic emergency procedures and phone numbers.

What do you think? When is the right time to begin leaving children at home alone? What has been your experience?

Photo: Macaulay Culkin starred as Kevin, the tween who got left behind when the familiy went on vacation in "Home Alone." Courtesy of NBC.

Posted by Liz Atwood at 6:10 AM | Permalink | Comments (6)
        

Sittercity, an online networking service for parents to find babysitters and other caregivers, sends word that it is offering a 20 percent discount on its signup fee this month to help parents coping with the sudden closure of schools due to swine flu. Sittercity also says it is working with the American Red Cross to help guide sitters in flu prevention.

When you sign up, use the promotion code FLU20 to get the discount.

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 4:25 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)
Categories: Health
        

I woke up to find out it's Star Wars Day because ... wait for it... it's May 4th. As in, May the 4th be with you. Har har.

Don't you love that there's a day for everything?

I wouldn't bother with this "news" except that it brings up a question I've been pondering lately. When is a child old enough to see "Star Wars"?

I loved the movie when I was young (I was 11 when it was released in theaters). But I still remember the scene when Luke Skywalker finds that the uncle and aunt who raised him have been killed by stormtroopers as somewhat scary. And Darth Vader was very scary. So my 5- and 8-year-old have not seen it yet.

But some of their friends have seen all the "Star Wars" movies, and are big fans, with no apparent ill effects.

Should I let them watch, and watch with them? Wait a while?

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 9:50 AM | Permalink | Comments (41)
Categories: Movies
        

MGB asked:

My fifth grader is heading to middle school in the Fall and right now all of the 5th grade parents are discussing this question among themselves: How do I know if my 12 year old needs/is ready for a cell phone?

I asked Bonnie Compton, a parenting coach and therapist in Ellicott City who last advised us on troublesome relatives, her opinion. She said that it depends on the child -- and the parents.

"Take a look at why the child wants a cell phone," she told me. "Is it purely peer pressure? Do the parents think it's necessary or would be beneficial to have one?" For example, if the child is  regularly walking home, or needs to be picked up from an after school activity and can't get into the office, a cell phone might be a good idea, Compton said.

Parents should also think about the cons of giving a middle-schooler a cell phone; namely, that it's not easy to monitor whom they're talking to or what's being said. There's also the texting issue, which has gotten lots of kids in trouble -- and occasionally presents parents with an unpleasantly huge cell phone bill.

That's why Compton advises that parents spend time asking lots of questions of a cell-phone provider about the controls it offers. Some plans will restrict calls to certain numbers. Some have built-in GPS systems, which parents tend to like but kids don't. And make sure the child understands and abides by his school rules on cell phones.

The bottom line? "Determine whether it is a need or a want the child has, and then set boundaries," Compton said. If those are not followed, the child loses the privilege of using a cell phone.

What's been your experience with this, middle-school parents?

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 6:59 AM | Permalink | Comments (14)
        

Now swine flu has caused Gov. Martin O'Malley to close four Maryland schools with suspected cases of the disease.

As a working parent, this strikes fear in my heart -- and not just for the most obvious reason that  swine flu appears to be spreading in our state. I'm also worried about what happens if my kids' school closes. How will my husband and I do our jobs while keeping them home? If the children congregate with other kids in a child-care setting, or even at a friend's house, supposedly that defeats the purpose of closing school. Colleagues probably wouldn't appreciate it if we brought the kids in to work.

Many working parents in the U.S. don't have paid sick time. And with layoffs a constant threat these days in so many industries, those who do have paid time off available are afraid to use it, especially if the schools are closed for an extended period.

I'd like to hear from you on this issue, especially if your children attend the affected schools (Milford Mill Academy in Baltimore County, Folger McKinsey Elementary in Anne Arundel County, Montpelier Elementary in Prince George's County, and Rockville High School in Montgomery County.)

How will you handle the work problem? And how will you keep the kids entertained without seeing their friends?

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 8:00 AM | Permalink | Comments (13)
Categories: Health
        

Did you catch the Today Show's segment on the "tummy tub," a bucket-like contraption for baby baths that's supposed to simulate the womb? If not, here it is:

The thing I noticed was that the babies, while very cute and seemingly happy in the tummy tubs, seemed to be months older than the weeks-old infants who are most terrified (and cold) in the standard infant safety tub. The pro-tummy tub argument on the segment is that babies are warmer and more comfortable in the bucket, which supposedly has an anti-skid bottom. But I would be squeamish about putting a really teeny baby in one. What do you think?

Actually, I think it's terrifying to give a baby his/her first bath no matter what you're using to do it. Terrifying for mom and dad, I mean!

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 12:00 PM | Permalink | Comments (26)
        

Joe Burris, a frequent Guest Dad here on Father's Day Friday, went to one of those mall play spaces with his 3-year-old daughter. It wasn't pretty.

Here's Joe:

Recently I took my 3-year-old daughter Onalenna to one of those play areas at a shopping mall where we live in Alexandria, Va. It was raining outside, and I wanted her to get some quality exercise time.

The area, about half the size of a basketball court, was lined with a soft floor surface, filled with kids and adorned with oversized plastic objects to climb and bounce on. How bad can it be, I figured.

After we departed, I jotted a personal memo to self: Never, ever, ever go there again.

I don't know who came up with the idea of such a play area, but I can't imagine it's anyone with kids. The good part about the place we went was that it had a height restriction of 42 inches. The bad part was that there no mall worker on hand to enforce it. That means that there were kids who were clearly school age running around with toddlers.

A few such boys (who appeared to be tween age) were getting a kick out of playing tag. One boy slapped another who corralled a little girl -- she couldn't have been more than 5 -- and tackled her Ray Lewis style. The girl cried loudly as her mother ran over to her in fright. The boy's father chastised him for such rough play and then apologized to the peeved mother. The rest of the kids continued playing as if nothing had happened.

We left shortly afterward.

I know the Obama administration has a long list of institutions in need of funding, but I sincerely wish they would put some of that stimulus money toward more open air spaces where kids can play. An area about half the size of a basketball court in a mall for dozens of kids simply makes no sense.

Posted by Kate Shatzkin at 9:31 AM | Permalink | Comments (5)