You'll remember that Jenn asked for help dealing with stares and intrusive comments she sometimes gets from both children and adults when her special-needs son acts out in public. For today's Consult, Mary Snyder-Vogel, a licensed clinical social worker who is assistant director of social work at Kennedy Krieger Institute, offers these tips:

"--Take a couple of deep breaths to steady yourself.

"--Try not to assume the worst about why a person is staring, meddling or giving advice. You could say: “My son has special needs and we are getting professional help. Please don’t make judgments about us. We are doing our best.”

"--Use the interaction as a 'teachable moment.' When stares or comments come from children (or adults), encourage them to ask questions. You could say: “I noticed that you were staring at my child. I know that sometimes people don’t know what to say, but do you have a question? I’d be happy to try to answer it.” Tell them a little bit about your son’s diagnosis.

"--Keep your sense of humor and concentrate on the positive gains your child makes. Tell everyone about them, even strangers. The more you can keep a positive perspective, the better you’ll feel.

"--Get to know other parents of children with special needs. Include them in your support network, share your experiences and learn other ways of coping with these situations."