Leaving older kids on the doorstep
This sad and perhaps telling story from the New York Times is getting a lot of attention. In Nebraska, a broad law designed to allow mothers unable or unwilling to care for newborn babies to leave them at hospitals has prompted a number of overwhelmed parents to abandon much-older children.
Is this a sign of our times?
Comments
If this law had been in effect during my offsprings' adolescence, I'd have given dropping-them-off some very serious thought. Actually, I was raised to face my own responsibilities, but it would have been a great fantasy.
Perhaps the upside to this is that parents who feel so overwhelmed can get some emotional or resource support? No, really, I was faking that goody-two-shoes thing, there. My real reaction is:
(BIG VOICE!) These are your kids! What did you think when you had them, they'd be cute forever?? What are they, puppies that you can drop off at the pound??
Posted by: Granny | October 3, 2008 12:03 PM
I think the Nebraska story is an unusual one. There were what, 9 kids? And the father was a recent widow? I can't imagine having that many children to care for WITH a spouse there to help me. By myself? Impossible. I'm not condoning what this father did. But I think it's very possible that he's suffering from grief and depression and needs help.
Posted by: Kayris | October 3, 2008 3:29 PM
I'm with Kayris. The man in Nebraska needed help, and he got help. I am all for parents being able to leave their children at the hospital -- at any age -- if it reduces the number of parents who turn to child abuse and even murder of their children because they are overwhelmed or suffering from some physical or mental illness like depression. We're not talking thousands of kids here! But if the parents are doing this, they probably DO need the help.
Posted by: Baltomommie | October 6, 2008 9:33 AM
I agree with Kayris, as well as the CPS woman that spoke about this on the Today Show this morning - the parent(s) who dropped off their teens are clearly doing the last possible resort they knew about. It appears like they felt they had no other alternative. We have no idea about the mental state of any of the parents that dropped off their children, or their emotional/financial/physical state. Getting dropped off at the hospital might have been the single best thing to ever happen to those teens. I don't think those instances speak as much about "what our world is coming to" as it does expose a gap in the support system in the community/government and definitely extended family that each of those parents sorely needed.
Posted by: Annelies | October 10, 2008 12:02 AM