Today’s Monday Consult question comes from a reader who was concerned about a lesson taught in her son’s kindergarten classroom. Because she suspects the lesson plan comes from higher up in the school than her son’s teacher, she was reluctant about taking it to the teacher. And she didn’t want to be seen as one of those pushy “helicopter parents” when the school year has just begun.

But our expert for today, Mariale Hardiman — former principal of Roland Park Elementary-Middle School and now assistant dean for urban school partnerships at the Johns Hopkins University School of Education, says it would be worse to leave the teacher out of the discussion.

If you complain to the principal, or the superintendent, the teacher will eventually be asked about it — and she probably won’t appreciate that you didn’t come to her first. “I think it’s always best to start with the teacher,” Hardiman says. “Getting the teacher’s perspective first before going anywhere else is really very helpful.”

Start by seeking a meeting with the teacher using her preferred method of communication, whether that’s a note in your child’s take-home folder or an e-mail, if she’s given out the address. Say you have a question about the lesson rather than a “problem” — that shows you’re willing to learn more about what’s behind the curriculum and are receptive to the teacher’s and the school’s point of view, Hardiman says.

Depending on the issue, things might be resolved during this discussion. If they’re not, and if the teacher’s not the one who controls this lesson plan, she can help guide a parent about where to go next, Hardiman says.