Senior week equals sheer heart attack for parents
Is your son or daughter at senior week, leaving you in abject fear? Andrew Ratner, our Guest Dad for Father's Day Tuesday, can relate. (He's Today editor at the Sun, and also writes a column on blogs.) Here's his post:
When I informed my colleagues about what I was going through this week, they reacted with a mix of sympathy and apprehension. My daughter is at "senior week" in Ocean City.
One co-worker said his son returned a few years ago with a mohawk hairdo, and though that colleague has a wry sense of humor, I don't think he was kidding.
Of all the "customs" I've adopted since moving to Maryland nearly 25 years ago -- rooting for the Orioles', eating crabs, visiting Hampden's holiday light show -- "senior week" is one I can't quite fathom. You get about a day to savor the pride and joy of seeing your child graduate from high school, only to be gripped with concern about how they'll make it through the following week downy oshun, like some kind of reverse parent boot camp.
Not having graduated from high school here, I went on Web sites like YouTube and flickr trying to "learn" what I could beforehand about the tradition, but perhaps thankfully, there wasn't all that much to be seen. Parents who've been through it describe it as through something to "survive."
There's always the option of forbidding your child from going, but if they're going away to college in a few months, that approach won't work for long.
I guess senior week -- or "June week" as it's sometimes called -- is like countless other tests of parenthood, only with the risk factor turned up several notches. Ultimately, you have to hope you gave your child the tools they'll need to cope in the world they're about to enter, even if it includes booze, boys and eight lanes of highway coursing through the middle.
Comments
It's a rite of passage for both the child and the parents. We kept the worry down to a low simmer by assuring ourselves that our sons had great friends, and making them promise not to come home with tattoos.
Posted by: Dahlink | June 3, 2008 6:57 AM
I went but it took months of convincing to get my parents to allow it. However they trusted me to make the right decisions and be careful. I called home everyday at the same time and I know they were insanely worried but it was worth it. I'm not sure how I'll feel in 14 years when my first baby is ready to go off to Senior Week....I'm not looking forward to it though!!
Posted by: Holly | June 3, 2008 9:13 AM
Ah, Senior Week... all those memories. Oh, wait, I blacked out for most of it.
Seriously, though, your daughter is fine. Bottom line is: if your kid is OK at home, they'll be OK at Senior Week. They may even learn a few important lessons about the evils of alcohol before they head off to college.
Posted by: Marc | June 3, 2008 10:31 AM
I've known people whose kids have not been allowed to go to Senior Week. Some of them have gone so far as to imply that I'm an unfit mother for having allowed mine to go. (We did oversee, to a degree, the planning, although they had to pay for it entirely themselves.) Could be my perspective is skewed, but it seems that those who disallow the trip are also the parents complaining about their own kids' immaturity. Try to think of it as a rite of passage for for both parent and child.
Posted by: Granny | June 3, 2008 10:53 AM
My father made it quite simple with me: "Get arrested and you better have friends to bail you out. Do not call us, we won't come get you."
He also told me that my friends better not be doing anything illegal if I'm with them, because I'm guilty by association. And again, he and my mother would not be making the trip to the police station to come get me. Even if it wasn't my fault.
I knew him well enough to know he meant it and I stayed out of trouble. (BTW I was told this when I was 14, but it applied through high school, Senior Week, college, and after I moved out).
Posted by: CH | June 3, 2008 11:50 AM
I have younger twin brothers. One came back from Senior Week with a tattoo and the other had wrecked the family car.
I solidified my spot once again as Daddy's favorite.
Posted by: AlisaBS | June 3, 2008 12:04 PM
I don't think my father had any idea what senior week was at all when he agreed to let me go. Bottom line, as others have said, is that if your child is fine at home they'll probably be fine there too. We *mostly* stayed out of trouble... ah, good times.
Posted by: Stephanie Sterling | June 3, 2008 6:00 PM
Ahh Senior week. what a time.
I was the guy stealing all the innocence from your young daughters.
Posted by: Kevin | June 9, 2008 9:58 AM
i am 18 and i would like to go to senior week, but i don't want my parents to think any less of my because they know what goes on during senior week. i want to go have a good time with my friends, but i won't be able to if my parents don't give me the go ahead. can anybody give me suggestions on how i would ask them about it?
Posted by: Anthony Sexton | October 21, 2008 10:00 AM