The Monday Consult: Report-card time
Happy Memorial Day. The Monday Consult is here, even on a holiday.
I got an e-mail with these tips last week from the Family Tree, the Baltimore nonprofit that works to prevent child abuse. They seemed particularly timely in light of the recent case of a 16-year-old Riderwood teen who is accused of killing his mother. According to police, they had argued over his performance in school.
And now the school year is ending, which means final grades are coming out. To avoid ugly confrontations over school, the Family Tree says to follow these guidelines:
• Listen when your teen wants to talk. Help them think through situations and come up with their own solutions.
• No matter what the issue, take a moment to calm down and communicate clearly.
• Be willing to compromise.
• Choose your words carefully to maintain their self esteem.
• Be realistic about your teen’s capabilities.
• Leave the past behind, and deal with the situation in front of you.
• Be aware of any changes in your teen’s life – new friends, change in school performance, or a change in sleep patterns.
• Assert authority in dangerous situations.
• Plan regular meals with your teen – it is a great way to understand what is going on in his or her life.
How do you handle report-card disappointments?
Comments
The incident in Riderwood was very sobering for every parent. Having survived the teen years with two sons, I can say that even though we have two wonderful young men, there were times when we wondered just who was living in our house. Adolescence is a roller-coaster ride for both the parents and the children. I do think the advice to eat regular meals together is excellent. I would add that getting to know your child's teachers, coaches and advisors is also a good idea. You can work together if a crisis is brewing if you have already established ties.
Posted by: Dahlink | May 26, 2008 9:56 AM