Harper's Island -- there's blood in the water on CBS
Let me cut right to chase on Harper’s Island, the new CBS drama premiering Thursday night: There’s human blood in the water at the start, and the pilot closes on a character losing his lower torso in a slow and grisly fashion to the hack, hack, hack of a killer’s blade.
And that kind of horror-movie violence might be the very thing that makes this series a rating winner.
Mind you, I am not predicting such success – there are too many flaws in the ointment of this series for me to confidently do that. But I’m just saying that Hollywood makes tens of millions of dollars in movie theaters with inexpensive feature films that rely on the same formula of beautiful young people getting savagely butchered while on some kind of outing that was expected to be a happy event, so why not TV?
The happy outing here is the lavish wedding of a wealthy man’s daughter on an island off the coast of Washington state. The rich man’s daughter is Trish Wellington (Katie Cassidy), and she’s marrying a poor boy who used to work in the summer on the island washing her daddy’s boats. The poor boy is Henry Dunn (Christopher Gorham), and daddy (Richard Burgi) hates this intended marriage.
We open dockside in Seattle where a luxury cruise boat loads up with mostly beautiful young people headed to the island for a weekend full of wedding events. The cast is huge, lovely to look at, and devoid of anyone who can act.
In this sense, it is more afternoon soap opera than horror movie. But the two genres do blend nicely once the killing starts.
Let me tell you how limited the young unknowns in this cast are: Harry Hamlin makes a guest appearance, and winds up stealing the hour. Harry Hamlin!
The idea here is that at least one person will die during every episode until the happy wedding on the island becomes a bloody nightmare. Think of an Agatha Christie mystery cast as a teen soap opera and then made into a horror flick. I say that with deep apologies to Christie and her billions of fans – I am just trying to explain the concept.
Part of the fun for young viewers will be in seeing if and how the series follows horror film conventions. The producers are obviously playing with the formula. In the publicity handouts from CBS, each character is not only named, but also listed by type.
The character named Chloe Carter (Cameron Richardson), for example, is tagged “The Flirt” by the producers. She’s the blonde, and I am guessing she is going to die as flirty blondes tend to do in such films.
If you like that kind of thing and can stomach the lower half of someone's body being gashed off, CBS may have your number with Harper’s Island, which premieres at 10 p.m. Thursday.
(Above: CBS photo of Elaine Cassidy and Christopher Gorham by Chris Helcermanas-Benge)
Categories: CBS, Scripted Series, TV Review
Comments
Hi David, good review. I like the idea of the horror movie meets soap idea - that means there's a little something for everyone. Just so you know, there is also a companion series online called "Harper's Globe," which was developed with the HI producers and follows the story of young girl named Robin. She arrived on the island a few weeks ago and we've gotten sort of a sneak peak of the island and even saw the wedding party in yesterday's episode. You can check it out at www.HarpersGlobe.com. Thanks!
Hi, thanks for letting me and the readers know. Sounds like a great new media companion piece. Thanks. Z
Posted by: Amanda | April 9, 2009 1:05 PM
The cast is huge, lovely to look at, and devoid of anyone who can act.
Aw, Z, I think you're being a bit harsh on the actors. I recognized a few of the faces from other things, and liked their performances in them. "Harper's Island" was definitely not the best showcase of their talents. (For example, Christopher Gorham of Ugly Betty and Jake 2.0)
Do you think they're supposed to be playing the characters "close to the vest" to keep the mystery of the whodunnit going? If so, it made a flat performance.
Of course the cliche music and writing wasn't helpful.
I was watching because HI reminded me of Agatha Christie's "10 Little Indians/And Then There Were None". But if it's continuing as just scantily clad bridesmaidens and slasher horror shtick I'll tune right out.
Based on last night, my guess is the murderer is Kenny the Shark from Jaws. Times are tough and he's got to stop selling LandShark candygrams after all.
Hi Terri, You might have a point about the actors having to play it close to the vest because of the whodunit aspect of the series. But for all the good points you make, I am not yet ready to say I was harsh. I kept thinking, "Did any of them stick out?" Yeah, Harry Hamlin, and that's a sad commentary on the rest of the cast. But I will stay tuned if you will keep watching, reading and posting comments. Thanks. Z
Posted by: Terri | April 10, 2009 2:16 PM
Hi David, you hit the nail on the head with the comment that Harper's is bereft of acting talent. I tried watching it but I gave up after 30 minutes. I can't believe CBS replaced the smart Eleventh Hour for this drivel. My only hope is that Eleventh Hour is renewed for the fall.
Posted by: Anonymous | April 10, 2009 8:35 PM