Reality Check

Project Runway: I suppose someone has to win Season 6

2009-11-20T09:50:24Z

And now, the end is here.
And so I face that final curtain.

First off, before we get to recapping the Project Runway Season 6 finale, a big thanks to all the kind souls who found their way back to this blog each week to read my corny jokes. Being a sports writer, I don't often get to crack wise about pop culture, but these Project Runway recaps turned out to be just what the doctor ordered for me this fall. They often made me forget about the plight of newspapers and the stress of real life -- my wife and I are about to have our first kid, and it could happen at any moment, so I'm glad I got this knocked out in the nick of time so I wouldn't be typing away in a delivery room, trying to fit one last joke in between my wife's contractions.

I think we all pretty much agree the show has been pretty ... meh this season, and the judges' final selection only confirms those feelings, even if it was probably the correct one. But the snark has made it almost worth it! So buckle up, and let's take one more ride to Bryant Park, shall we?

At the fair Hyatt Hotel, we lay our scene. Civil blood is about to make civil hands unclean.

Carol Hannah is brushing her teeth while Irina and Althea drink orange juice that I bet Tim Gunn got up at dawn to squeeze by hand. Carol Hannah is sick, sick, sick, and is trying to suck it up and stay on her feet.

"I feel bad, but there is really nothing I can do to help her," Irina says. Anyone who really believes Irina gives two thimbles worth of a damn about Carol Hannah's health at this point should really see if they can buy the Brooklyn Bridge from Bernie Madoff because I hear he's willing to move quickly on a deal if you'll pay cash.

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Cut to a talking head of Logan, who says he’s impressed with and proud of Carol Hannah. He comes over and gives her a hug, which gets him an evil look from Althea and Irina. You know what? It seems obvious at this point that Logan is Jake Ryan from 16 Candles and Carol Hannah is Samantha. If only John Hughes had lived to see this play out in real life.

Gordana is barking at Irina like she's a military general tasked with crushing a revolution, and Irina is her first lieutenant, which is odd considering it's the other way around. “You have to finishing everything today," Gordana says. "You must!”

Carol Hannah is fighting off the flu like Michael Jordan in the 1997 NBA Finals, and Christopher is playing the role of Scottie Pippen as she cries into his arms. I wonder if in her dehydrated state if she thinks she's really hugging Logan.

It's time for a hair and make-up session with Collier Strong. Carol Hannah tells him her looks were inspired by gothic architecture and fairy tales, and I think we all know what that's code for -- make 'em look like Bella from Twilight, y'all. Now that I think about it, Strong looks like he could have been a vampire in a different era -- like the Buffy the Vampire Slayer era -- back when vampires were badasses instead of moody emo teens who wrote poetry and tried to work up the courage to hold your hand.

It looks to me like Irina is putting the finishing touches on a giant bear suit. Seriously, it reminds me of what Han Solo wore when he went marching into the sub-zero temps on Hoth to save Luke Skywalker after his speeder crashed. If one of her models tries to cut open Michael Kors with her light saber so she can crawl her skinny butt inside his guts for warmth, I’m going to be so pissed.

Tim enters the workroom wearing a stunning fuchsia tie and a stern look on his face. He wants to remind Irina that she's taking a real risk with her all-black collection, which looks like Phantom of the Opera crossed with the Road Warrior.

Minutes later, Althea is showing Tim an outfit with pointy shoulder pads that I'm pretty certain was inspired by the Michael Jackson movie Captin EO. (I saw it at Epcot Center in Disney World when I was in the third grade -- in 3D no less -- and I swear to God, it was like giving a 10-year-old LSD.)

But wait a minute: Althea is explaining the make-up she wants to give her models when Tim mentions that it sounds a bit too much like what Irina's doing. Irina rolls her eyes (of course she does) and then adds "That's Althea!" under her breath, which is pretty rich considering the judges had to zing her in last week's episode for fashion plagiarism. Somewhere in his parents' basement in Virginia, disgraced former New York Times reporter Jayson Blair is sitting around watching this in his underwear and wondering why he can't be a guest judge if this kind of hypocrisy is going to be condoned. (And yet, somehow, he'd still be as qualified as Lindsay Lohan.)

Tim asks Althea if there is "anything else you’re getting concerned about?" and Althea bursts into tears.

I bet in the next shot, she belted out, "Yeah, I'm concerned Irina might stab me with a pair of scissors!" but the producers edited it out.

The next morning, Carol Hannah says she feels a little better, and that she doesn't think she's going to die after all. Irina and Althea seem a little disappointed, and it gets me thinking: Wouldn’t it be awesome to have an all-star season of previously bitchy Project Runway designers? Tell me you wouldn't love to see Irina talk smack about Santino and Kenley while occasionally making out with Jeffery?

Yo, models in the house! They begin their final fittings by dancing around in their underwear. (Ladies, must you throw yourselves at Logan like this?) I've mostly refrained from commenting on the models because I mostly like to pretend that their half-hour show, Models of the Runway, never happened. But let me just say that if Carol Hannah wins this thing, someone is going to need to explain it to her model, Lisa, like five times using flash cards and hand signals because I'm convinced Lisa would lose in a game of Scrabble to one of the workroom sewing machines. She is that dumb. She makes Carrie Prejean look like the president of the MENSA celibacy club.

Gordana is still having flashbacks to dictators of yesterday. "I know you see me with coffee, hon. But I working, trust me!" she tells Irina.

Tim gathers everyone around. He has a special announcement. "Do you know what’s about to happen?"

Everyone is silent. It pops into my head that Tim might announce that he's going to take everyone to a Knicks game. Oh, the horror, the horror.

"Tomorrow you're going to be showing at Bryant Park!" Tim squeals, and all the ladies squeal with him.

One more time, with feeling! Happy working song! Happy working song! Let’s all sing a happy working song!

Cut to the next day. It's 3:14 a.m., according to the Hyatt digital clock next to someone's bed. Seriously, who knew that Carol Hannah and Althea had to get up this early to put on all that eye make-up? I mean, it makes sense, but damn.

Everyone is ready to take on the world! Except ... Irina can’t open the door. It won't budge. I briefly wonder if the real twist this season is that Heidi has turned this into Saw VII, and the three of them are going to have to cut off one of their own limbs to make it out of the hotel room. (No wonder Nina and Michael wanted no part of this season! Jigsaw was obviously involved.) But, my fears are quickly put to rest when it turns out you just have to pull the door open, not push it. It seems Irina is a graduate of Gary Larson's School for the Gifted.

Cut to backstage at Bryant Park, where Tim is slowly losing his mind. None of the designers is ready, or even close to being ready. He is indignant. For the first time ever, I wonder if he might slap someone.

“This is crazy! We’ve got to go! We should be lining up!” he exclaims.

I feel so bad for Tim because he's one of the few people on this show whose standards never waver. I'm afraid he’s about to snap like Michael Douglass in Falling Down. If that does go down, and there is a fashion God, you just know that Kenley Collins and Victorya Hong have to stumble into the crossfire.

Heidi makes her first appearance of this episode, coming onto the runway in what I can only describe as the worst outfit in the six-year history of this show. As I alluded to last week when I saw the preview for the finale, she looks like she got stuck in traffic behind the Straight Talk Express and had to borrow clothes from Cindy McCain just to get to the show on time. It's a shiny pink pantsuit and I feel blinded by its neon glow. Her giant butterfly brooch also appears to be contemplating an attack on her face.

Michael and Nina are on hand ~~to collect their checks~~ do their jobs and the guest judge for this week is someone named Suzy Menkes, who we learn is the fashion critic for the International Herald Tribune. She looks a little like Dolores Umbridge from Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, but I'm just thrilled that between the Herald-Tribune and the Los Angeles Times challenge, I think Project Runway has done more for newspapers this year than I have. By the way, Michael is again wearing sunglasses indoors, a look that was either inspired by Kanye or the FBI poster of the Unabomber. I can't decide.

Collection time. Althea's goes down the runway first. She has lots of knits and sportswear. I've been ragging on her all year for the way her designs tend to lack bra support, but she seems to have reigned in the twins this time. Her collection isn't bad, but I'm underwhelmed, which sums up the way I've felt about her all season.

In the crowd, we see a quick shot of Nicolas, who has dyed his hair brown. I wonder if he's trying to hide from Georgian gangsters in Irina's family.

Carol Hannah's collection is next, and it's obvious she has some beautiful dresses, although I'm not sure what ties it all together. The sad truth about the final challenge on Project Runway is that whomever figures out some goofy accessory to go with their collection usually gets major points for "tying everything together" even if the accessory is kind of a joke, like Jay McCarroll's spray-painted, noise-canceling ear phones in Season 1. I'm at the point now where I believe if you got 13 paper crowns from Burger King on the way to Bryant Park and then put them on the heads of the models, you'd get credit for "tying together the collection."

And of course, Irina has tied together her black-and-bearskin-rug collection with tiny hats that are a cross between equestrian helmets and infantry helmets from World War I. Lately, I feel like if I needed to hire someone to design a dress for Sydney Bristow (Jennifer Garner) on the second season of Alias, when she was a badass female double agent, Irina would totally be my go-to girl. But that doesn't mean she deserves to win the overall Project Runway crown.

After the designs wrap up, we get quick comments from Epperson, Johnny, Shirin, Louis, Nicolas, and Ra'mon. I'm sort of curious why we didn't hear from Qristyl, but maybe they were handing out free vowels on the other side of the room and she didn't have time for a talking head spot.

Back at Parsons, the judges say they love everyone. Menkes appears to have forgotten to take the roller out of the front of her hair, which is something I thought only happened on the Flintstones.

In addition to $100,000 and a spread in Marie Claire magazine, the winner also gets an all-expenses paid vacation to Paris. It doesn't say whether Logan will be there when you arrive, shirtless on the bed and eating strawberries, but I'm going to just assume that's how it's set up until I'm told otherwise.

This recap is swelling in size like Klum's pregnant belly, so we're going to cut right to the chase. Irina's collection gets high marks, but Nina does remind her that she was warned about an all-black series of outfits. Michael Kors also says he's seen the "warrior woman character" before and there is really nothing new here, but I get the sense they're just trying to throw me off the scent.

Carol Hannah's collection earns raves for several different pieces -- including her whipped together 13th look, which Heidi loves -- but also criticized for not having something to tie it all together. (See! Burger King crowns would have been perfect right here! Ta da!) Menkes does praise Carol Hannah for "having real desire!" and suddenly I think Menkes is quite the saucy English minx.

Althea earns props for being "plugged into the street" which doesn't make any sense, but Nina says she could see several of her outfits appearing in the pages of Marie Claire. Right next to the "20 New Sex Positions You Can Try Tonight" articles, I suspect.

The judges talk it over in a fairly uneventful conference session. But then begins my favorite part: The last bit of spooky drum music we'll hear this year. I can't help but wonder, who is mixing this stuff? And is it piped into the runway room when Heidi is putting on her SERIOUS FACE.

I keep imagining some poor guy in a sound booth somewhere getting screamed at by Harvey Weinstein: "More drums! I said I want more drums! Ok, now give me some xylophone! Damn it, I said more xylophone! Now give me some weirdo feedback that's a little bit like the sound check at a Pink Floyd concert!Yes, that's exactly what I want!"

Poor Carol Hannah. I guess she wasn't quite Michael Jordan with a case of the flu after all, because she is the first to get eliminated. If only she had grabbed those Burger King crowns like I suggested. I'm surprised Heidi decides she's going to kiss Carol Hannah even if it means maybe catching the swine flu.

Suddenly it was down to two, so that means it's time to re-cue the scary bongo drum music.

"Dum, dum, dum! Dum Dum dumm! (More drums! More xylophone! More cowbell!)

Congratulations to Irina, says Heidi, and everyone's favorite ice queen melts down and cries openly on the runway. In a moment so awkward words cannot do it proper justice, Althea has to hug Irina twice, then sit there and wallow in her shame and disappointment as Irina gets heartily praised by the judges.

As Irina cries, I notice that even her nail polish is black. I'm sort of stunned her tears aren't made of crude oil.

"I’m definitely proud of myself," Irina says. "I think it does deserve a pat on the back because I had some stiff competition."

Sorry but ... what are you talking about, Irina? You talked trash just about everyone in the room for 12 weeks straight and now want to call them stiff competition? Egads.

Suddenly Irina's father is crying. The silent black man is also up on stage, and so are Irina's mom and sister.

"I don't think I've ever seen my dad cry," Irina says. "I think he's finally going to take me seriously".

Suddenly Nina is crying. Twice, she wipes a tear from her face as Irina's dad bawls openly.

Well, if that doesn't sum it up, I don't know what does. Let the record show that Season 6 of Project Runway made Nina Garcia cry. I don't know if it was from empathy for the emotions of it all, or because she was in tremendous pain from watching such a weirdo season.

Still, I suspect I'll be back, one way or another.

Thanks again, kids. And as always, auf wiedersehen, baby.

'Survivor: Samoa': Now what?

2009-11-20T02:00:26Z

I just can't wait to see what happens tonight on Survivor: Samoa after Russell's crazy blindside last week, his second in a row.

Russell thinks it was pretty awesome, comparing himself to Picasso and telling Dave and the other folks from his old tribe that it was "almost as great as my kids being born."

Shambo calls Laura a snake, evil serpent and all sorts of things. And then she pulls her smartest move ever (sigh) and basically makes it clear to John that she has flipped. Why? Augh!

In the reward challenge, there are two teams of five. One person lies face down in a cradle, and the other four maneuver them around with ropes as they grab 15 numbered flags in order and put them in a slot. It sounds easier than it looks like it actually is. The purple group (Natalie, Russell, Dave Ball, Laura and Brett) wins. They head out to a waterfall for a picnic lunch and spend some time with a product-placed phone, using it to take pictures.

]]> Back at camp, Jaison talks up Monica to become the sixth in their group. He and Mick talk to her about Shambo being the fifth without mentioning her, but Monica's not dumb. She is pretty sure it's Shambo. Also, she wants to get rid of John. Well, that's not rocket science.

Then at the challenge, they finally stop taking MySpace-angles pictures of themselves and realize there are clues to the hidden immunity idol on the phone. This includes a video of it being under a moss-covered rock.

When everyone gets back to camp, Russell tells Jaison and they start looking for the idol. Dave follows him around, Laura, too. Russell runs away -- and you can basically tell that the camerapeople are like, "Craaaaap, we can't keep up!"

Oh, and seemingly moments after getting away from Dave? RUSSELL FINDS THE THIRD IDOL! Who is this guy?

(Side note: How about that Sunday CBS football commercial? First, it says that "Brett Favre leads the New York Jets" in their game against the "undefeated Titans." Favre? Jets? I know he changes teams a lot, but I'm pretty sure he's on the Vikings. Also, since when is 3-6 undefeated? Then the list of all of Sunday's games comes up, and every single matchup is wrong. They just ran LAST YEAR'S COMMERCIAL. The games they're talking about happened on Nov. 23, 2008. Bahahahahahahahaha! Well done, CBS!)

Back at camp again, Monica tells Laura that she thinks the Foa Foas have "at least two people" already on their side. (Is she counting herself as the second one?) She says she doesn't trust Shambo or John, and Laura's pretty sure she needs to win again or she's done for.

In the immunity challenge, they have to throw a rock at some tiles and break as many as possible. For every tile that breaks, they get one spear. The spears they will throw at a target, and whoever gets a spear the closest to the target gets immunity.

When Laura fails to break a tile, Shambo cracks up so rudely. That's just bad gameplay, but what else is new?

Only Jaison, Mick, Monica and Brett get to shoot the spear, Brett twice. Brett lands on the target, while Jaison and Monica miss completely. Mick lands closer to the center than Brett, and Brett's second shot is too far away, so Mick wins immunity.

Shambo tells Brett that she's voting for Laura tonight, regardless of what anyone else does. He seems disappointed.

Laura and Dave come to John to figure out how to vote, and John interviews about how horrendous the analytical skills of his tribemates are. So much so that they decide to have Monica tell the Foa Foas that they will vote for John, while in reality she will vote for Natalie with her tribe. So in theory, there will be five votes Natalie, four John and one Laura. But will they trust her?

Russell's like mmm-hmmm, OK, lets her leave and then decides to tell John that his tribe is going to vote for him. But Brett tells him first. John looks not thrilled to have four votes possibly cast for him. He's mad. Then Russell talks to him on the side and says he's pretty sure they're being "swindled" into voting for John. They decide that it goes to a tie, then on the revote, John votes for Laura. Well, they kind of decide. John's last statement before tribal council is, "I don't know what I'm going to do."

At TC, Shambo says that Galu has been broken since Erik got voted out. Jeff talks to them about whether they are prepared to take it to a tie (after two ties, they draw rocks and somebody's out). Everyone's like, "Sure!" Jeff is incredulous, as he should be. But, man, he's excited to read these votes.

Russell, by the way, doesn't play the idol. They're pretty sure he has it, so that's enough to keep their votes away from him.

The votes start coming, and it's between Laura and Natalie. It's a tie. Laura and Natalie don't vote, everyone else has to vote for one of them. Is John going to flip? The other question: Will the person who spelled Laura's name "Luara" fix it on the revote? The answer is yes on both counts. OK, actually, these might be the best shocked faces at a TC this season, and you know that's saying something.

People. This season is good.

Lackluster finale for pint-sized 'America's Next Top Model'

2009-11-19T18:33:50Z

John-John is back with a look at the ANTM finale ...

It’s hard to believe that we’ve made it through an entire pint-sized season of America’s Next Top Model. I mention the size factor because it has been shoved down our throats the entire season. This year – as you remember – has featured models that are 5’7” and shorter. Tyra Banks and company used every free moment they could to remind us of this. I don’t even remember this much repetition for anti-drug campaigns growing up. Anywho, the models were shorter than usual this season.

Finalists Nicole and Laura started the season finale chatting about their beginnings. Nicole was talking about her awkward shyness. Laura spoke of her humble origins. She also dropped in a line about her being dyslexic, which was not really an issue the entire season. But the magic of editing suddenly turned Laura’s learning disability into a major plot point. (My guess is that a lack of overall conflict between both girls had the producers scrambling for some roadblock to make the finale more compelling.)

The dyslexia immediately became an issue when the girls learned that they had to shoot a commercial for Covergirl. Uh oh. Dyslexia + a script + nervousness= potential disaster.

The rest of the episode really seemed to flash by in a blur. Mr. Jay Manuel introduced last year’s winner Teyona, who noticeably stumbled over her own Covergirl spiel this episode. Nigel Barker joined the two finalists for a beauty shot. Nicole did a fantastic job posing with Nigel. Meanwhile, Laura was struggling with her commercial. She commented in a confessional that being nervous made her dyslexia worse. (Not a good thing at all.) Nicole also struggled with her own nerves during her commercial. Then Nicole started sounding snobby during her commercial takes, according to Mr. Jay. You could begin to see some daylight for Laura.

]]> The two girls then shot their potential Seventeen Magazine spread. Both girls looked really good.

Going into the fashion show, both said they were confident about their chances.

The girls got to have some one-on-one time with Tyra. Nicole shared that she led a very sheltered life and was awkward growing up. Laura also shared her humble Kentucky beginnings. She started to cry when she talked about her family, and how she was called stupid by her teachers growing up. (Insert Tyra giving her Oprah-inspired wisdom. Blahahahahahaha)

Booted contestants Erin, Brittany, Sundai, and Jennifer were brought back to participate in the Julia Clancey fashion show. It was the first time that eliminated models were brought back to participate in the finale fashion show. (I guess Tyra wanted to give the “petite” models as much exposure as possible since it is so hard out there for shorter beautiful people. (Insert sarcasm here.)

Erin, Sundai, and Jennifer said they wanted Laura to win. Brittany said that either girl had a chance. (No duh, Brittany.)

This was probably one of the most lackluster finales ever.

Nicole had a horrible walk. She was anything but graceful. She stomped down the runway like Frankenstein or someone with inner ear problems. Laura looked like a seasoned pro. All those years of her walking down the aisles of Walmart paid off. She looked very comfortable.

The fashion show had an elements theme. The first runway walk was fire. Wind, and water followed. Other than Nicole’s hunchback impersonation, the show went off without a hitch.

Afterwards, Tyra greeted them with words of encouragement. (Yawn.)

Later that night, Tyra reminded the hopefuls of the spoils: a contract with Wilhelmina models; a cover of Seventeen Magazine; and a $100,000 contract with Covergirl.

The three main judges proceeded to critique the entire body of work of each model this season.

Miss Jay Alexander-- who was so distracting with those redonkulously huge shoulder pads-- said Laura did “pretty damn well.” Tyra actually defended Nicole’s walk saying that it was a “signature walk.” Nigel said her walk insured that Nicole wouldn’t be ignored.

Then the judges combed through the entire season of photos. Both finalists got their share of positive feedback. Nicole’s Las Vegas photo was critiqued while Laura was praised.

Then it was time to watch the Covergirl commercial. Laura’s individual take was very good. Tyra remarked that she couldn’t notice the dyslexia. Nigel said some of Laura’s words were muffled.

Nicole was very likable, according to Tyra. Unfortunately, Nicole forgot to model, Tyra remarked. (Ouch.)

Both models received praise for their beauty shots photographed by Nigel Barker.

I had no idea who was going to win as the last commercial break came on.

After the judges did a little more pondering where they agreed that: America would love Laura; and Milan would love Nicole, they were ready to crown a winner. It was Nicole.

Laura wept. Tyra comforted her and remarked that she’s now a model. (Thanks for the affirmation, Tyra.)

After drop kicking Laura off the stage, Tyra turned her attention to Nicole.

“You are a star,” Tyra gushed. “You have it!”

Tyra and Nicole immediately went to do a photo shoot with Nigel.

This is the point where the dramatic voiceover was inserted of Nicole saying she had to embarrass herself to compete this season. She also said she’s a dork and America’s Next Top Model. Aw, there’s hope for everyone now. (Insert vomit.)

Project Runway prediction time: Who wins?

2009-11-19T18:01:39Z

Well gang, it's finally here: The Project Runway Season 6 Finale. I think we're all in agreement this year was a bit of a mixed bag.

At times, the comedy was better than the actual designs, and much of that comedy wasn't intentional.

You can't specifically blame Lifetime or the Los Angeles locale, but it's clear that the return to New York will be good for everyone, especially if it means Michael Kors and Nina Garcia will be on the scene much more frequently. All that said, I'm still intrigued to see who wraps up the victory tonight: Irina, Carol Hannah or Althea.

I'm prepared to turn my snark meter up to 11 and have my wrap-up posted early Friday morning, but until then, leave your predictions below. What surprises do we potentially have in store? Will Irina scare the judges into giving her all-black collection a win? Will Johnny return to solve the mystery of the sputtering iron? Will Mitchell pop up to let us know he still hasn't learned how to sew? Will the winner get to make out with Logan?

While you ponder those thoughts, and many others, if haven't read this awesome interview with Tim Gunn from the Los Angeles Times you should definitely do so because it's just another reminder that he remains the heart of this show, through thick and thin -- the impeccably dressed, witty and gracious heart.

'Top Chef: Las Vegas': d'Or galore

2009-11-19T04:03:43Z

Greetings, Top Chef watchers. Liz and Justine here to chronicle the last week before the competition moves from its cozy home of Las Vegas to the finale in Napa Valley. Most of the fat has been trimmed from the ranks of the cheftestants but one more still has to be cut.

Enough with the cheesy cooking plays on words. On to the cooking!

(Photo of Bryan Voltaggio presenting to the judges from bravotv.com)

]]> The show barely starts before we're faced with two major fashion moments -- Did you see Bryan's sparkly silver rock-star belt? How about Kevin wearing a rosary under his T-shirt? Like all of the chefs, they're missing their families and doing it for them. Eli reveals to the viewers at home something Liz knew all along: that he's friends with past cheftestant and finalist Richard Blais! Eli was even best man at Blais' wedding! (Liz saw them compete together on Iron Chef America a few weeks back, so she was hoping they'd talk about that in this show.)

Quickfire

Today's guest for the quickfire challenge is Gavin Kaysen, noted young chef who has represented America in the ultimate culinary competition, Bocuse d'Or. We learn through some very retro looking stock footage that the Bocuse is like the Olympics of cooking (but they spared us any mentions of the most famous Olympian to date, Michael Phelps) where everything's meticulously prepared and served on giant mirrored platters.

As the quickfire, the chefs must make a protein within a protein within a protein (think turducken ... Justine wanted someone to actually make one, but alas, they're more creative and snobby than that).

During the cooking, it's a chance for the producers to take us inside the heads of the chefs. Bearded Kevin says the Voltaggio brothers take risks with their food (welcome to the competition, Yukon Cornelius. Where have you been?). Michael Volt says there's not a lot for Jen to do left in the competition. But, probably much to his chagrin, when Padma goes to sample Jen's dish, she says "Welcome back."

And Jen wins! That was a huge shock, especially since she's been flaking out a lot in the past few weeks. Is she back on the fast track to winning? For winning, she gets an extra 30 minutes to cook in the elimination challenge.

(The most notable dish for Justine and Liz during the quickfire, though, was Eli's Scotch egg. We had never seen such a dish before going to this year's Maryland Renaissance Festival, where one of our traveling companions ate one. It totally grossed Liz out. She still feels the same way about Scotch eggs, even though dreamy Eli was cooking it this week.)

Elimination

It's time for the Top Chef Bocuse d'Or! This is arguably one of the most challenging tasks posed before cheftestants in any season, not because of what they actually have to cook, but becuase of the high standards they will be held to. They have to prepare one protein (their choice of either salmon or lamb) and two garnishes. You know, a typical garnish like a zucchini woven into a basket with something served in it. Or at least that's what Chef Kaysen wanted us to think about when he mentioned garnihses. They have to serve to a panel of 12 tough judges and members of the American Bocuse d'Or panel and noted chef Thomas Keller. The mention of his name alone was enough to make some of the chefs noticably cringe.

Off to Whole Foods! (Not that anything important or funny happened during the shopping trip. We just haven't been able to say that in what seems like a few weeks)

Back at Casa de Chefs, everyone's busy planning their menus. Everyone, that is, except Michael Voltaggio. He goes to bed instead of watching the painfully retro Bocuse d'Or DVDs. (Justine wonders aloud why they serve their dishes on mirrored platters? Liz thinks it's because they can't rely on a streak of gastrique and call it presentation.) Bearded Kevin asks for Bryan's advice on how to successfully sous-vide lamb. Bryan, as saintly as he is, helps the bearded one out, but mentions that some other chefs (like his brother) may not have been so generous with their knowledge.

While the chefs are busy in the kitchen, they're hit with a plot twist: Chef Tom says the winner will get $30,000 courtesy of the M Resort! A collective panic surges through the kitchen.

During the service, the diners are harsh. They're holding the cheftestants to Bocuse d'Or standards and criticizing every little thing about the dishes. Bearded Kevin's dish was too simple (and what's with his random plug for sustainability? What is this, green week?). Michael's Mediterranean dishes didn't have enough flavor. Bryan's lamb was undercooked. Eli's lamb was also undercooked and carved poorly (at least he let his meat rest unlike Hector earlier in the season). Jen's food wasn't well thought out even though the food tasted good.

The hits keep on coming: Chef Keller tells the cheftestants the winner will get a chance to compete on the 2011 Bocuse d'Or American team! (Justine wonders if they were holding out on that gem until they saw everyone didn't completlely screw up their dishes.)

Judges' Table

We're down to the wire, folks, so no top and bottom this time. Everyone's called before the judges. They reiterated the diners' comments and critiques, but no one's dishes really stood out as a clear favorite.

And the winner is ... Bearded Kevin! Kind of a shock, seeing as how they were calling his food simple and he tried a technique he doesn't have that much experience with so late in the competition. But, as we know, simple doesn't always mean bad. Simple food can be good if done well. To gear up for the 2011 Bocuse d'Or, he gets a few cookbooks and chef's jacket from the son of the competition's founder.

The judges then tick down the line of cheftestants, citing the redeeming qualities of the dishes (like how Bryan's would have been much better had he more time to cook). Michael gets a scathing review of his food, but apparently the judges were taking their season performance into account because Eli gets the boot. (Justine said he got Eli-minated, but Liz was too distraught to laugh. The loss is especially hard for Liz to take, since Friday is her birthday and seeing her man make it to the finale would have been the ultimate gift from Bravo. She shrieked in a combination of sadness and horror when he got sent home, and her dog appeared worried at the mournful cry.)

Predictions

Who's going home next: We're down to the final four we've been predicting pretty much all season, so choosing who's going to get kicked out is tough. Justine thinks they'll get rid of Michael because he get distracted by his own arrogance. And, despite Jen's comeback this week, Liz still thinks Jen is a target, unless she's focused herself during their hiatus before the finale.

Who's going to win it all: Justine thinks Kevin has a really good shot but is still rooting for Bryan, probably just because it ticks Liz off that she's rooting against her favorite. Correction: Justine is rooting for Bryan because he's the cutest. (Apparently the show changed to be called "Top Hot Chef" without anyone knowing.)

Discussion

Will you be adding a huge mirrored tray to your holiday wish list so you can stage your own Bocuse d'Or competitions at home? Who of the eliminated cheftestants would you want to come back as your sous chef in the finale? Did you see Padma has bangs in the preview for next week -- are bangs back???

'So You Think You Can Dance' results: Top 12 revealed

2009-11-19T02:01:07Z

Wade and Amanda Robson are, of course, responsible for the drop-dead amazing group number that opens tonight's So You Think You Can Dance results show. It's awesome -- the dancers portray statues in a museum who go a little bananas. Love it!

Abruptly, it's time for some results: Ashleigh and Jakob are, duh, safe. Kevin and Karen are, duh, in danger. Ryan and Ellenore are also safe, and so are Russell and Noelle. Channing and Victor are, however, in the bottom three. This leaves Mollee and Nathan and Kathryn and Legacy. Kathryn and Legacy are safe, so Mollee and Nathan are the third couple in danger.

]]> Next, there's a performance by MD and Bollywood Productions -- tons of fun, of course!

Then the solos begin. Karen is first. She brings back the sexuality that was missing from her Broadway performance last night, but that's about all that's there. I'm thinking she's probably out. Kevin has more content, but it takes him a little while to get started. Channing continues her theme of being uncaged and lets it all out during her solo. Victor, too. Tons of turns! Mollee is ready and brings an amazing amount of energy to the stage. Same with Nathan. The last two, though, have moves that I have to rewind a couple of times and go, "Was that on purpose?" Nigel points out that they haven't ever seen anything like Mollee's cartwheel onto her knee -- so yes, that was.

The musical guest to take up some time while the judges deliberate is Orianthi, who's played guitar with Carlos Santana and Carrie Underwood, among others. Now she's going for a solo career. We'll see how that goes.

The women in danger are up first. Nigel says they are unanimous on both decisions. He tells Mollee that she proved tonight that she can dance like a woman and proved what "dancing for your life" means. She's safe. He tells Channing and Karen that this is about performance and technique. He says that Channing's personality hasn't been coming out much until lately, and that Karen is a performer as well as a star. So Karen is staying and Channing is out. Bummer. I thought Karen's solo was pretty substandard.

Guys' turn. Nigel tells Nathan he learned "a hell of a lesson" this week and tonight he proved himself. He's safe. He tells Victor that his solo was strong, though he needs to not just turn-turn-turn (OK, he says pirouette). To Kevin, he says he always seems like he feels a little uncomfortable and though he is growing just by doing the routines, he isn't at the same standard as the other two. So Kevin is out, and Victor is safe.

I'm not shocked by that result since Victor and Nathan were so strong.

What do you think about the results?

Me, I'm off to watch Glee with the bonus of songs (or at least a song) by the Police. Wheeeee!

'The Biggest Loser': Hey, Tim Gunn's coming to dinner again!

2009-11-18T18:22:33Z

The best part about tonight's Biggest Loser? That half-hour holiday special that preceded it, making it the hour and a half program it ought to be.

Except that, hark! It's makeover week, and that's my favorite. That's OK, as long as they cut out all the repeating and not the glamour. After a fakeout in which the contestants thought they were getting makeovers and instead were told that they have to give speeches, Tim Gunn and Tabatha Coffey appeared to tell them, just kidding, it is makeover time.

Yay!

As it turns out, though, we didn't get enough Tim G. time for my liking. We see him briefly talking with all the contestants about what they are looking for, their struggles with finding clothes that fit and flatter, and so on. Then, there were glimpses of some of the contestants in the stylist's chair with Tabatha, mostly focusing on Rudy not wanting to cut off his beard.

The reveals were a little bizarre. One by one, each contesant came forward to see Tim, who was stunned by the transformation of each of them. Then he took each person by the shoulders, said there was one more surprise and turned them around to show them that their families were there. Awww, sweet! But this all happened backstage of where they were going to be giving speeches, which was awkward. The dominant emotion remained surprise and joy, though. But to a person, everyone looked great. Rudy shaved! Rebecca got an awesome haircut! Allen killed it in his suit! Danny lost the gray hair! Liz looked like a million bucks! Amanda rocked this gorgeous blue shirt!

]]> Anyway, then it was time for all of those speeches. We only saw snippets of them, but Liz was the only one who was shown making a challenge to the audience. (It's possible everyone else did, too, and we just didn't see it, but it was probably the most effective moment in engaging the audience.) This got me to thinking, is there any other reality show whose contestants go on to become ambassadors in this particular way? You don't see Richard Hatch or Johnny Fairplay making speeches about how to start fires, backstab your friends and influence people. There's no Amazing Race seminars on how to book efficient travel or Big Brother houseguests giving tips on dealing with agoraphobia. But pretty much most Biggest Loser contestants seem to end up in a post-show career of helping people. (Not that there's anything wrong with that; it's just unique, I think.)

The speeches (during which we were treated to unflattering up-the-nose camera angles on the family members, the trainers, and Tim, Tabatha and Allison) struck similar notes, except that Rudy revealed that he began overeating after dealing with the death of his sister from cancer during his childhood. Cut to Bob and Jillian: Huh?

Back at the ranch, and dealing with their new hairdos in new ways, it was challenge time. The contestants had to pull themselves 700 feet across a canyon 200 feet up in the air. The first person across won a two-week vacation to this resort-spa that might be somehow associated with the show (I can't quite remember ).

Everyone looked a little intimidated, but Liz was losing her mind, unable to stop talking and making bizarre, fearful noises. When the challenge started, Rudy shot across the rope with Amanda close behind, and Liz? Liz started pulling herself across the canyon and just kept her eyes closed. Slow, but effective. I was really impressed she came up with a way to deal with her fear and complete what was before her.

After the challenge, Bob took a moment to pull Allen aside for a quick chat about why he isn't dominating the challenges since he's the fittest (oh, and also for an oh-so-natural product-placement moment). Allen as much as admitted that he's been throwing the challenges to keep the target off his back. Bob said that much gameplay usually backfires, but Allen assured him that he wasn't going to take it that far. Then, they somehow crammed five days of working out into one massive last-chance workout. Everyone was working hard and pushing themselves. Very little drama and yelling. T

Jillian talked with Rudy about why he hadn't discussed his sister's death, and he said he didn't think it was something he wanted to share in that way. She talked and talked with him and finally got him to realize/admit that when his folks' attention was so turned toward his sister during her illness that he felt abandoned and that he had some hurt he had to deal with.

And what comes after the last-chance workout? Weigh-in, of course. There were some big numbers and some small. All the women were hoping to land under 200, but only Amanda did, with a very satisfying 9-pound loss, her biggest of the season. Liz and Rebecca each only lost 3 pounds, which put them in the bottom two.

In the end, Rebecca was voted out, but the odd drama with Rudy carried over from last week. As he cast his vote, he said he didn't trust Rebecca. She asked for clarification, and he referenced her sitting in on the other team's voting meetings earlier in the season. She was rightly totally perplexed that he didn't ever talked with her about his feelings on this matter and then dropped it on her at voting. So it was a sad end for Rebecca on the show.

But in her makeover moment, she looked great! And she ran a half-marathon, too.

What did you think about the episode?

P.S. In case you missed Rebecca's appearance on Jay Leno last night, here it is: Biggest bombshell? She and Daniel are dating!

'Dancing With the Stars' results: Who goes home?

2009-11-18T03:01:29Z

Guest blogger Carla here, recapping for Sarah, who is recapping "So You Think You Can Dance."

And then there were four ... who will be narrowed down to three. But first, the judges want to see Mya and Dmitry Chaplin's salsa from last night. Judge Len Goodman wants to see her "tutti frutti booty"? Really? I was "Gossip Girl"ing last night and missed this. (P.S. My dad -- Hi Dad! -- is rooting for Mya.)

Next up is a recap of last night's performances, followed by some results ... oh, wait, no. We're going to have to wait a bit longer.

Now for a time suck: The dancers talk about the other dancers' strengths. Whatever happens, they will be happy! It has been the times of their lives! (Pick another cheesy competition cliche and insert here: It was probably said.)

]]> We're now treated to a dance performance of "~~The~~ Be Italian" from the Weinstein Co.'s coming film "Nine." And after the commercial break, Alicia Keys! She's pretty phenomenal. I don't think I'll fast-forward through this one.

Next, there's a segment on pressure, which is basically the dancers lip-synching Queen's "Under Pressure." Really? Really? After that train wreck, we learn that Mya and Dmitry Chaplin are in the finals. No surprise there. I think they'll win it all.

Leona Lewis, clad in a fabulous white dress, follows with a song that is not "Bleeding Love." She's all right. But you know what is better? That Donny Osmond and Kym Johnson are in the finals. And that "jilted Bachelorette" Melissa Rycroft and Tony Dovoloni, who placed third on the show last spring, are performing a hustle as the Bee Gees sing "You Should Be Dancing." That wasn't sarcasm. I really liked Melissa last season, and who doesn't like disco? (OK, the disco part was sarcasm.) It's kind of a shame that she dances after the pros, though, because they are much better. She and Tony, however, do a fabulous lift at the end.

(Side note: Samantha Harris? Bad host or worst host ever?)

There's now a segment about putting together the pro numbers. It's compared to a kindergarten full of dancers with lots of different ideas, all of who bicker about the choreography during a short amount of time.

Two couple are left. Judge Len Goodman says Kelly Osbourne has taken dancing into her heart and that Joanna Krupa has been the most consistent. Surprisingly, Joanna Krupa and Derek Hough are out. Kelly Osbourne and Louis Van Amstel are in.

Joanna and Derek get to do a real final dance.

What do you think? I'm expecting a lot of disagreement!

'So You Think You can Dance' recap: Top 14 perform

2009-11-18T03:00:56Z

Tonight's So You Think You Can Dance kicks off with childhood pictures of the judges -- "in the interest of fairness" -- because we're going to see childhood videos of the contestants tonight. Fun! Embarrassing, but fun!

The first couple of the night is Ashleigh and Jakob with a hip-hop routine by Tabitha and Napoleon. In the story of the dance, they're a couple and she's discovered that he cheated. I'm not always a fan of T&N's routines, but Ashleigh and Jakob perform it really well, including the acting part. The only thing I hate is Ashleigh's pants. Nigel Lythgoe says he loved their "gimmick," adding that Jakob is stepping up to choreographic challenges every single week and that he will make it to the Top 10. He says he originally thought Ashleigh had the potential for growth and would ride Jakob's coattails into the Top 10, but that she has grown far beyond his expectations. Mary Murphy says she was spellbound Ashleigh's passion was and that Jakob was totally on point. Adam Shankman Jakob is the biggest shoo-in for the Top 10 they've ever had. He also says he was one of the people who didn't believe in Ashleigh and that now he's a believer.

Karen and Kevin are doing Broadway with Spencer Liff. In rehearsal, they talk about how this routine is so difficult and complex and what trouble they're having with it. Liff interviews that he frankly thought it was going to be a cakewalk, and he was wrong. The performance is OK, but with all that buildup about how hard it was, it seems somewhat subdued. Still entertaining, though. Nigel welcomes Spencer to the show. He says it was a style that required humor in their performance. He says this was the first time she wasn't supposed to be sexual, and she didn't bring that humor or personality to it in that place. Yet, Nigel thinks Kevin brought even less to the stage, character-wise. Mary agrees that it needed to be so much more. "The whole thing seemed nice, and safe," she says. Adam says it was a challenging blend of movements and that it was amazing to watch Kevin get through it so well. He adds that he liked seeing Karen having to perform without being in "tigress" mode. He says it was a bump, but they are great.

Russell and Noelle are working with Eddie Simon on a second foxtrot, only this time, Noelle gets to perform it (she was injured last week, if you've lost track). Their dance is somehow smooth and groovy, and they're engaging with the audience more, too. Nigel says this was a whole new foxtrotting Russell, so much better than week one. He says Russell is a star and never ceases to amaze him. To Noelle, he says that she fights to get out of Russell's shadow, and she's getting there. Mary says Russell is so far outside his style, but he didn't look worried at all. She goes on to praise Noelle's technique and movement, saying how proud she is of them. Adam says the performance was exuding joy and confidence. He says it was fantastic and he loves them.

]]> Channing and Victor are doing jazz with Tyce DiOrio, portraying blackbirds coming out to play. Tyce keeps giggling devilishly in the interview segment. It's cool and fun and weird, but there is a part in the middle that seems kind of ... normal, whereas in the rest, they are clearly portraying birds. It's like they break character, except that it seems like a problem in the routine, not in them. Nigel says this is the first time it looked like Channing enjoyed her performance, and thus he enjoyed it more. He says Victor hasn't shown as much growth as some of the other guys, saying he needs to keep pushing himself. Mary found it playful and quirky and she loved it. Adam says Channing is finding her way into the show, at last. He adds that the music alienated him a bit from the performance, but he got into it. He and Mary both agree with Nigel on the idea that Victor needs to continue to raise his performance level.

Kathryn and Legacy work with Tony Meredith on the paso doble. They bring passion and power to their characters on the stage, but I can't speak to their technique. As a regular old viewer, I'm pretty impressed overall, though they have a bit of strangeness with their last lift and the final move. Nigel says Kathryn is much improved from last week's juvenile performance, adding that she was absolutely magnificent. He says Legacy is always practicing, even in the hallway. He says that hunger, passion and need for knowledge is going to push him into the Top 10. Mary says Kathryn played it just right and that Legacy is "just crazy again this week." She's particularly impressed with his character and his growth. Adam says Kathryn killed it (in a good way) and Legacy is crushing the competition.

We get an update on the Dizzy Feet Foundation in the meantime.

Ellenore and Ryan are working with Travis Wall (WOOT!) on a contemporary routine. First off, Travis is amazing -- three seconds into this routine, and I'm riveted. And these two are great in this -- Ryan annoys me some, but his brute strength is helpful, and Ellenore brings a lot of character and personality, too. Nigel says there is a lot of luck -- that last week, they had an awful routine (sorry to the choreographer) and this week, they so lucked into having Travis. He says they also benefited from Ryan's hours in the gym -- that the lifts didn't show the preparation. He also says that Ellenore is "the sharpest tool in the box" according to the choreographers. He means tool in a good way. Mary says Ellenore is having star quality moments, for her beauty and her technique and her ability to get into the characters. She says that Ryan is an inspiration to ballroom kids who are afraid to get off the circuit and try something new. She gets so emotional she can barely speak. Adam says SYTYCD has just kicked in with the combination of Ellenore, Ryan and Travis.

The last couple of the night is Mollee and Nathan, and they better be good, following that last routine. They are doing pop-jazz with LaurieAnn Gibson. It's good, entertaining, fun. But it's just not at the same emotional level as the previous performance, and I think they suffer from that. Nigel says they dug much deeper this week than during last week's salsa, and adds that Mollee has the potential to be a great professional. He adds that Nathan is extremely talented, but that he needs to show growth because he has the potential to be one of the best dancers they have ever had on this show. Mary says it's good to have the dream team back again after scaring them half to death last week. Adam says he's with the other two on the props, but he wants to talk strategy. He tells Nathan that seeing him say in the interview about how he always got whatever he wanted was bad because this won't come easy to them. He wants the choreographers to push them to engage the audience more.

What did you think about the night's performances? There were some great moments from just about everyone, but I think it's pretty obvious that Karen and Kevin will be in trouble.

'The Biggest Loser': Updates on Shay and Daniel

2009-11-17T15:55:43Z

Last week, we all had some confusion about why Shay Sorrells didn't get her makeover moment at the end of The Biggest Loser. Still not sure why that didn't happen, but she's kept on progressing. Here's video from the Today show this morning, featuring Shay, who has lost an additional 50 pounds since getting voted out, and Daniel Wright, who was also expelled during last week's double eviction:

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

'Dancing With the Stars' recap: Semi-finals are here

2009-11-17T06:01:25Z

I'm getting a late start on this recap thanks to the Ravens game, so this might be a little more concise than usual. But hey, maybe that's not a bad thing?

Anyway, it's semifinal time already. Except that when we see the opening credits, it feels like this season has been on forevah!

First up are Donny Osmond and Kym Johnson with the tango. He gets advice from Gilles Marini that he should make everyone uncomfortable. It makes sense in context, but Donny's on the cute end of the spectrum, Gilles at the sultry end, so what works for Gilles won't necessarily work for Donny. It's OK, not great, but the ending maneuver doesn't quite work. Donny sits down on the floor on the way to judging because he is so mad at himself. Head judge Len Goodman says his Argentine tango a couple of weeks ago was great, but this was not. Bruno Tonioli says he lost it completely and it went to pieces. Carrie Ann Inaba says there wasn't push and pull or light and shade, but he did handle the "costume misfortunes" of getting stuck in Kym's dress pretty well. Scores: 7-7-7, for a 21/30.

Next are Derek Hough and Joanna Krupa with the Viennese waltz. They look lovely (I even love Joanna's dress, and I usually think the costumes are pretty awful and gaudy). They are also helped by dancing to "Hallelujah," one of the best songs ever-ever. Bruno says this waltz had the grace of angels in heaven, but there was a slight hesitation throughout. Still, he says, fantastic. Carrie Ann says she was so raw at the beginning, and she has grown so much. Len says their hold when they are together is amazing, and that there was a little weirdness, but mostly it was a beautiful dance. Scores: 9-9-9, for a 27/30.

]]> Kelly Osbourne and Louis Van Amstel have the rumba for their first dance. Kelly has to do a solo in part of the dance, and she doesn't look super comfortable in that part, but the rest is done well. Sharon is jumping up and down in the audience; it's so cute. Carrie Ann says she totally gets it, and that she was brought to tears by her performance. Len say she has turned into an "absolutely competent dancer," but he doesn't think this was her best. Bruno agrees that she's endearing, but that the rumba should have a relentless sense of eroticism and this didn't. Scores: 8-8-8, for a 24/30.

Mya and Dmitry Chaplin dance the waltz for their first performance of the night. Their dance is just breathtaking and, yes, in a different league than everything else we've seen tonight. Gorgeous. Len says he loved it and it had romance and total control. "It was an absolute joy to watch." "That was love set to music," says Bruno. Carrie Ann says she loved it too, but that she has the potential to get 10s every single week and she thinks they lacked a hair of connection in their hold. Everyone boos. Scores: 9-9-10, for a 28/30.

Donny and Kym return for the samba. Booty-shaking notwithstanding, this style is much more in Donny's comfort zone. He looks confident again! Mr. Heart on His Sleeve cheers for himself afterward. Bruno says he came back and nailed it. Carrie Ann says this was better but it felt a little sloppy. Len agrees with Bruno and says this was a metamorphosis. Scores: 8-9-9, for a 26/30, for a 47/60 total.

Joanna and Derek dance the cha-cha-cha. Augh, why the return of the fringed pants? The performance is OK, but it seems a little slow, a little restrained. Carrie Ann says they did a great job. Len says it was clean, quick and had great rhythm, but could have been more cheeky. Bruno calls her "natural sex" and says she has set a very high standard. Scores: 9-9-9, for a 27/30, and a 54/60 total.

Kelly and Louis dance the quickstep for round two. Holy speediness, Batman. They are ALL OVER THE PLACE to "99 Red Balloons," and the crowd is in love. Len says two people loved that: "your mum and me." Bruno says she was like Speedy Gonzales, though she missed one teesy step. Carrie Ann says she nailed it and that she stayed with Louis the whole time. Scores: 9-9-9, for a 27/30 and a total 51/60.

Mya and Dmitry are next with the salsa. In the intro segment, Mya calls her self "this Maryland girl," and I'm like, hey, wait a minute ... did I miss a local this whole season? But everything I have read about her places her in the D.C. area. Now I'm confused. They dance to a supercharged version of "La Isla Bonita," and it's FAN-FREAKING-TASTIC. So fast, so amazing, so good. Bruno: "SEN-SA-TION-AL!" Carrie Ann says it was hot beyond belief and that it was good -- and complicated. Len says he was mesmerized by her buttocks (I swear that's a direct quote). He says she should absolutely be in the finale. Scores: 30/30, for a 58/60.

Last is the "knockout round," in which the couples choose the style and the song, for total creative control.

Kym and Donny do the jitterbug. It's goofy fun, fast and silly, and thankfully shorter than the first two rounds. Carrie Ann says he has his mojo back. Len says two out of three isn't bad. Bruno says he's recharged. Scores: 9-9-9, for a 27/30, and a 74/90 total.

Joanna and Derek take on salsa. It's fun, too, but I feel kind of bad for them doing salsa after Mya's amazing performance. I'm a little worried that Joanna is going to shake herself right out of her outfit. Len says it was hot. Bruno says it was delicious and flirtatious. Carrie Ann says she generates heat and that it was excellent. Scores: 9-9-9, for a 27/30 and an 81/90.

Kelly and Louis cha cha to "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun." It's so cute, but it seems short compared to the others. Bruno says she had precise timing and finishing all her moves. Carrie Ann says she did a great job, especially with her hands. Len says she did three dances to a high level this evening. Scores: 9-9-9, for a 27/30 and 78/90.

Last we've got Mya and Dmitry also with the cha cha. More fast, more fun. Carrie Ann says it wasn't speaking to her. Len says he was disappointed because he wanted it to go on a bit longer. Bruno says it was like an action-packed trailer for a blockbuster. Scores: 9-10-10, for a 29/30 and a total 87/90.

OK, so who is cut tomorrow night? I feel like it should be Donny or Kelly but won't be because of their fan bases. I think Mya's probably safe with those amazing scores and that fab salsa will get people on the phone. So ... Joanna maybe?

What do you think?

Just a programming note ...

2009-11-17T02:37:31Z

Just a warning that my Dancing With the Stars recap will be a little late thanks to the Ravens' Monday Night Football game. (I know, I know, it's crazy that we're a one-TV household.) But I'll get it posted as soon as possible.

'The Amazing race' recap: Mud, more mud and vocabulary troubles

2009-11-16T16:39:31Z

Bucky's back with a rundown on last night's muddy episode of The Amazing Race.

This week’s leg of The Amazing Race begins with the Globetrotters, who finished first last week, departing at 2:23 a.m. to catch a ferry for a 16-hour ride across the Baltic Sea to Estonia. They get to the ferry terminal and find that the next ferry leaves at 5:45 p.m. This means, I calculate in my head, that they will arrive in Estonia almost a day and a half after they left the previous pit stop, even though it’s not all that far from Sweden to Estonia. Why do the producers do that?

We learn that Sam and Dan have made up and agreed that bickering is no way to compete, which means that more bickering is on the way, I think. We also learn that Matt has worn his black bandana, a signal to the other teams that he and his father mean business and are in the race to win it.

]]> In Estonia, the teams have to take a set of keys, figure out which one opens the door to the clubhouse of a secret Estonian society, go downstairs into the most secret part of the clubhouse and get a candelabra with a room number on it. Then they are to go to the room and figure out how to read a secret scroll for directions to the next clue box.

All the teams start working on this task, except for Gary and Matt, who have to perform their penalty Speed Bump for not being eliminated last week. This turns out to be less like a penalty and more like a short vacation: Take a five-minute sauna on a “saunabus,” which is just what it sounds like — a sauna on a bus. Matt, however, walks around asking “What’s a saunabus?” (That’s OK … I didn’t know there were places where they have saunas on buses, either.) They eventually figure out what it is, find it and get into the sauna, where Matt is seated next to a very attractive Finnish girl dressed in a towel. She looks at Matt with her sky-blue eyes and asks, “Why are you wearing that dorky black bandana?” Ha Ha ha. No she didn’t. I just made that up.

Back at the secret clubhouse, all the teams eventually figure out how to read the scrolls and head to Pikk Hermann Tower Garden (the destination revealed when the scroll is held up to a candle) to find their next clue. (Here I should point out that, for some reason, the wax thing with a wick is spelled “can-d-l-e” while the thing that holds them is spelled “can-d-e-l-abra”. I hate the English language.)

The teams depart the secret clubhouse. Gary and Matt finish the Speed Bump, depart the saunabus and head to the clubhouse, where Matt wanders around asking, “What’s a candelabra?” I think maybe the black bandana is tied a little too tightly. (However, during a commercial, I call Bucky Jr. and ask if he knows what a candelabra is. He doesn’t. Maybe it’s just because I’m old enough to remember Liberace that I do.) (Note from SKK: But, despite the weird spelling issue, it's not that big of a jump from candalabra to candle, right? When Matt was asking people if they were the "canDAluhBRA," I was cringing almost as bad as when hardly anyone could spell Chekhov last season.)

At the Gardens, the teams get their Detour choice: Serve (play volleyball with some locals) or Sling (shoot a slingshot at a moose target). They all choose Serve (and Cheyne informs us that Megan played volleyball in high school while he “has played some beach volleyball.”)

Megan & Cheyne arrive at the volleyball courts first and find they are really big mud (we think) pits. However this doesn’t seem to hamper Megan and she beats the locals pretty much single-handedly, while that dope Cheyne moans, “I’m really tired.” They head down a narrow wooden walkway to the Pit Stop.

Sam & Dan and the Globetrotters, who ended up sharing a taxi (and not willingly) arrive next. Brian and Ericka arrive last and, since there are only two volleyball mud-pits, decide to switch to Sling rather than waiting for a volleyball court to open up.

Meanwhile, back at the clubhouse, Matt figures out what a “candelabra” is, finds the scroll, figures out how to read it, but doesn’t read the “Garden” part of the directions. So they go to Pikk Hermann Tower and waste valuable time trying to figure out how to get in the tower. Eventually they stumble onto the Detour clue and head off to do Sling.

Back at the mud-pits, neither the Globetrotters nor Sam & Dan are having a very easy time of it. Sam & Dan seem to get points only when the local opponents miss, while Big Easy is totally mired in the mud, so his local opponents keep serving to him. Finally, however, they win and head to the pit stop … BUT THEY HEAD THE WRONG WAY DOWN THE NARROW WOODEN WALKWAY! They make this mistake even though neither of them is wearing a black bandana!

Sam & Dan win shortly thereafter and head the right way to the Pit Stop. When the Globetrotters see this, they run, catch up to Sam & Dan and much elbowing occurs. Somehow Sam & Dan survive the pushing and shoving to arrive at the Pit Stop first. Phil brings Big Easy and Flight Time up on the mat, too. He wants to see a rumble. (Does anybody call it a “rumble” anymore?) Words are exchanged, Big Easy says he is “6’3” and 260 pounds and a serious fracas is foreshadowed for a future episode.

Brian & Ericka complete the Sling Detour and are next to finish.

Finally, Gary & Matt arrive at the Detour, and Matt wanders around asking, “What’s a moose?” No, he didn’t. I made that up, too. Gary & Matt finish this leg in last place and are eliminated.

I’m sad.

Who are you rooting for now? I’d like to cheer for Megan and Cheyne, except I know that if they win, Cheyne will keep half the million-dollar prize, even though Megan has completed the last two legs single-handedly.

Oh, and Sam & Dan vs. Big Easy & Flight Time: who ya got?

'Top Chef: Las Vegas': We have a winner, winner, chicken dinner

2009-11-13T17:40:26Z

Thanks to all of the commenters who entered our contest for the most creative quickfire challenge. After much deliberation between Justine and me (now I know how Padma and Chef Tom feel!), we've narrowed the entries down to our favorites. I know we said we'd have 3 winners at first, but since there were so many clever concepts, we expanded it to five winners. Prizes include Season 5 of Top Chef (for all you Hosea fans out there), Season 1 of Gordon Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares (the UK edition), and a cookbook of our choosing from The Baltimore Sun's cookbook library (which may or may not relate to the challenges the winners suggested).

Check out the winners after the jump!

(Photo of Michael Voltaggio serving a recent quickfire dish from bravotv.com)

]]> Our favorite quickfire selection is one of the most basic and useful to the home chef:

Or a $20 mystery basket challenge...30 minutes to create something wonderful from the common ingredients in the basket. If everyone has the same ingredients, the best Chefs dishes should stand out.
Posted by GrayGirl

Next, this suggestion got at one of our favorite lines of all time (I think Chef Tom said it) -- "Who expects to win Top Chef by making a pasta salad?"

Since pasta salads tend to get cheftestants eliminated, there could be a QF in which the chefs must produce a tasty and unusual pasta salad.
Submitted by Kathy

Thirdly, this quickfire made us think of what we'd cook to represent Toby. I vote it be something bland and cliche. :)

Draw knives with the judges' names on them - Padma, Tom, Gail, Toby or other former guest judges. The contestants would have to prepare a dish inspired by the person.
Posted by hal

Gotta love a challenge that requires cheftestants to keep a good attitude.

How about making a dessert in 20 minutes without complaining once about it?
Posted by linz

Last, but never least, this QF tears the cheftestants from their world of fresh-from-the-farm ingredients and makes them cook like the common folk.

Make a meal out of only frozen foods. Meat, veggies, etc. They can be pre-thawed to save time.
Posted by Sarah

We can't thank everyone enough for entering. Keep checking back for our weekly recaps and musings on Top Chef.

(Winners, we'll be sending you an e-mail to make arrangements to get the prize to you.)

Project Runway: Guess who's coming to dinner? Tim Gunn!

2009-11-13T12:51:38Z

Well kids, I'm Kevin Van Valkenburg, sports writer in my spare time, but Project Runway blogger at heart. And as my favorite cheesy Swedish heavy metal band, Europe, would say...

It's the final countdown! (Da da da daaaaa! Da da da da daaaaaa!) It's the final countdown!

This season of Project Runway has been, I think we'd all agree, a bit uneven at best. A little soulless, even, almost like its Los Angeles locale. As much as I've enjoyed it for comedic purposes, ultimately we're left with three designers I can't quite figure out how to love, for either personal or professional reasons. I suppose if I wanted someone interrogated and waterboarded, Irina would be a great ally because she'd never flinch. (If this fashion thing doesn't work out, she definitely has a potential career as a villain-for-hire.) And I guess Carol Hannah is the dorky, but adorable little sister most of us never had. But as we wrap up this season with a two-parter in Bryant Park, I'm going to confess I can't wait for the show to get back to New York full time.

But the saving grace is that the penultimate episode each season -- where Tim Gunn knocks on your door -- is always one of my favorites, so as Michael Buffer would say, let's get ready to ~~rumble~~ recaaaaaap!

This episode begins with Tim and Heidi giving their usual cheery instructions, letting the designers know Tim will be dropping by, blah, blah, blah. But then, something surreal happens. Tim and Heidi go behind the silhouette screen and start freak dancing on one another. I'm nearly at a loss for words. It's like walking in on your parents and catching them passionately making out. I'm going to be traumatized for the rest of the episode.

Cut to talking heads by Althea and Irina, during which they express how much they'd like to murder one another and dump the other’s body in the Pine Barrens of New Jersey. But of course, they pretend to be all Babysitter's Club BFFs to one another's faces.

"Althea and Carol Hannah are intimidated. They're expecting me to take the big guns to Bryant Park but I'm brining a tank. I'm taking the whole army," Irina says.

I think it's awesome that Carol Hannah's fantasies growing up probably involved Barbie and Ken sharing a South Carolina beach house and 13 kids, while Irina's seem more likely about leading the Georgian army to victory in battle over the Russians.
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Tim -- who, by the way, looks the way Irving Berlin looks in my head -- trudges through the snow, and greets Carol Hannah with a warm hug. She informs Tim she moved to Draperville because there were too many distractions in Charleston, and on the way up North, she stopped by Duke University for inspiration. The result was a purple mess that Tim calls an ice skating outfit. (See, this is what happens when you listen to Mike Krzyzewski, Carol Hannah. FAIL!)

Before Tim departs, he puts on an apron and lends a hand in the kitchen, because Carol Hannah's family has flown in from South Carolina to give him some southern hospitality. Watching Tim delicately make perfect biscuits with a wine glass only makes me wonder if there is anything he can't do. Seriously, the man could out-Martha Martha Stewart while wearing a tailored suit. I wish President Obama would appoint him to be America's Czar of Class and Fabulousness.

Carol Hannah's family talks about her journey from nerdy Southern girl to Project Runway finalist and her dad compliments her in a way that almost makes me cry. (In my defense, Christopher would have been bawling by this point.) Then, she and Tim go make snow angels in the front yard. At least that's how I'll choose to remember it.

Cut to the Upper East Side of Manhattan, where Tim is visiting Irina. She buzzes him in to her fourth floor walk-up instead of meeting him at the front door, which I can only assume is a power play. Irina's dog Princess meets Tim at the door and tries to warn Tim that Irina plans to tie him up and torture him into liking her designs, but Tim is either unafraid of the danger that lurks inside Irina's lair, or he doesn't speak poodle. I can't tell.

Irina tells us she's been making T-shirts inspired by Coney Island, where she grew up after her parents moved from The Republic of Georgia. Seriously, Coney Island? Was Irina's dad a carney? This is so disappointing. I always assumed he was like an arms trader or a thumb breaker for the Georgian mafia. I suppose he still could have been a point shaver who worked with Stephon Marburry. That would make me feel a little better.

The rest of Irina's collection looks pretty solid, although it has a lot of fur for my tastes. Tim meets up with Irina's friends and family at a restaurant, and it turns out that she has an equally beautiful sister. It makes me wonder if Lifetime would ever consider a “Keeping Up With The Shabayevas” reality show. I would totally watch that with Irina's dad, Aron, playing the Bruce Jenner role. He is everything I hoped he would be. The producers flash a picture of him holding his daughter at one point, and he was rocking a perfect Tom Selleck mustache.

Even though Irina's family speaks pretty passable English, Project Runway still decides to use subtitles when they talk, which seems a little offensive. Irina's mom recounts a conversation with her daughter she had recently where Irina mentioned she was stressed out, and Marianna Shabayeva told her "You have to win. You have no choice." It's hard to tell if this was meant as encouragement or as a threat. I guess it was lost in translation.

A handsome African-American gentleman sits next to Irina during the entire lunch, but he is neither identified nor allowed to speak. I assume he's Irina's boyfriend, but she has frightened him into silence.

Next, it's off to Ohio where Tim is visiting Althea. For some reason, her studio is in the dingy loft (or basement, I'm somewhat unclear) of an industrial warehouse and I'm briefly worried that Tim might be walking into the Dayton, Ohio version of Fight Club. (Look out Tim! Althea's other personality might be evil Kenley Collins!)

Althea shows off her designs by trying some them on for Tim, which seems like the kind of advantage Jay McCarroll never had in Season 1. Tim doesn't seem too impressed with whatever it is Althea's doing, and honestly, neither am I. At one point, we see a sequined top that I bet Liza Minelli would love. I guess she'll just have to copy whatever Irina comes up with once she gets to New York.

At Althea's parents’ house, we meet her boyfriend, who seems to have borrowed a sweater from LaVar Burton's dressing room on the Reading Rainbow set. We do see some pretty cute pictures of Althea as a kid, and I briefly feel bad for not liking her very much. I quickly get over it though because I'm a bit unnerved by how much Althea's dad looks like Bob Bowman, Michael Phelps' swim coach. Having spent the last several years covering Phelps, I suddenly wish he could have been a guest judge this season, just because seeing him sit unshaven and sneering next to Zooey Glassner would have made my day. He couldn't be any worse that Lindsey Lohan.

Uh oh! Seems Irina can't use her Coney Island T-shirt design because it's trademarked and the producers think that will be a form of cheating. What a delicious bit of irony. J'accuse, Ms. Shabayeva! The alleged victim of design theft has been unmasked as a perp herself!

Even though Irina and Althea hate one another's guts, when they both arrive in NYC at the same time, they kiss one another on the cheek the way Tony Soprano and Phil Leotardo used to greet one another. They're staying at the Grand Hyatt, which seems like a bad choice by the Project Runway producers. That's a lot of Marriott points they're missing out on.

Irina and Althea sit down on the couch to wait for Carol Hannah to arrive. Here is a rough transcript of their awkward conversation:

Irina: Where do think Carol Hannah is? I would like to murder you before she gets here so there are no witnesses.

Althea: That's a good question. I hope Carol Hannah is O.K., and that she gets here soon so I can recruit her in a plot to asphyxiate you in your sleep.

Tim finally arrives to inform the dueling divas that Carol Hannah has a stomach virus that is contagious. You can immediately see the compassion drain from both their faces as the prospect of Carol Hannah passing along her illness to them becomes apparent.

"What if it's only two people?" Althea asks Irina after Tim departs.

"If it's just the two of us? We'll either become best friends or the worst enemies," Irina says.

Hmm. Which one to bet on? Such a tough call.

Cut to the workroom at Parson's. Oh New School, how we've missed you. And guess what? Carol Hannah arrives! She says she's spent the last two days barfing into a toilet. Irina and Althea nod with fake sympathy. Tim checks in to comment on the designers’ collections, and he turns up his nose (thankfully) at Althea's Liza Minelli tribute.

"Maybe if your grandmother were here, she could wear this," Tim says. Oh snap!

But Tim isn't done. He says Althea's collection has no cohesion because, while some of it looks fashion-forward, other parts of it look "borderline Hillary Clinton." Wait, is Tim suggesting Althea's clothes are what you wear if you want to make up a story on the campaign trail about dodging sniper bullets in Bosnia? I wish Gordana was here to set me straight.

Tim gives Carol Hannah some ho-hum advice, and she seems like she'll be mostly O.K., but the real entertainment comes when he gets a look at Irina's unfinished collection. It seems to have been inspired by Cormac McCarthy's novel, The Road. It's black on black with black trim. Even her two gray pieces, which I guess are supposed to lighten the mood, remind me of ash and soot and end of days.

This episode is so stuffed with awesome that I'm afraid I'm going to have breeze past the model casting. Here is a quick summary: All three designers chose tall, skinny girls. I didn't see that one coming.

Well, well, guess which fashion-crime fighting team is back together again and paying a surprise visit to our designers? Michael Kors and Nina Garcia. I'm suddenly liking Irina's chances a lot more since both Michael and Nina are dressed in black from head to toe. But I start having second thoughts when it appears that Nina and Irina are eyeing one another like jungle cats.

Michael then says something that I'm fairly confident is not so much design advice as it is his erotic Hugh Jackman fantasy. I swear to God, this is his verbatim quote: "In a weird way, think about taking us on a ride. The first look has to wow us. Wake us up! But then, let us take a breath. Down, up, down, up."

Nina warns Irina that an all-black collection will be difficult to judge editorially. And of course, Irina takes this advice to heart and vows to switch things up, because she knows somewhere down in her cold, black heart that Nina is right.

Just kidding!

"I disagree with Nina about having an all-black collection," Irina says. "I know she's a judge, but color just doesn't fit in with what I'm doing. I think I'm going to keep it the way it is."

There is a brief model fitting, and then a non-surprise surprise that everyone should have seen coming: Heidi arrives to inform the designers that they have to create one more look for the runway show. (At this point, wouldn't you just have an extra outfit stuffed in your bag? This has only happened the last five seasons.) Also, because Lifetime still needs to drum up a plot for Models of the Runway, the designers’ models will be casting for the 13th look. Somehow Heidi manages to convey all of this without cue cards, but the delivery is not pretty. She seems uncomfortable interacting with designers when they're not bending down to kiss her cheeks auf wiedersehen.

But wait! Another non-surprise surprise! Gordana, Logan and Christopher are here to help with the final outfit. The only suspense with the pairings was which designer was going to pick Logan first, Althea or Carol Hannah, and it turns out to be Althea. Chin Beard -- I'm sorry, Christopher -- ends up with Carol Hannah and the different generations of Bond Girl villains, Irina and Gordana, are again reunited. (Reunited and it feels so evil!)

Heidi and Tim kiss on the lips before Heidi leaves, and it's just as awkward as it was when they were freak dancing at the beginning of the episode. If I were Seal, I'd insist on DNA testing for his and Heidi's next kid, especially if it comes out with silver hair and impeccable taste in suits.

Quick trip to Mood. Running, running, no one helping. (Glad to see the staffers at Mood: NYC are as haughty and lazy as the ones in Mood: L.A.)

Bryant Park looms, and the episode ends with Carol Hannah ralphing into the toilet. Althea puts ice on her neck, and then in the preview for next week, we get a shot of Heidi dressed like Cindy McCain in a gaudy pink pantsuit. Considering this was filmed last fall during the election, to me it looks like Heidi backed the wrong horse. Whose fashion-forward now, Heidi? We all know Michelle Obama Purple is in. Which means, unfortunately, you're out.

Until next week!

It's the final countdown! (Da da da daaaaa! Da da da da daaaaa!)