'America's Next Top Model': bad walks and meat garments, oh my
Guest blogger John-John Williams IV reports:
On this week's Top Model, the girls went to a fire station for a little runway training with “Miss J.” The runway coach and show judge encouraged the gals to sashay up and down the runway with confidence. And he wasn’t afraid to join them to critique their bad technique. Gotta love Miss J and his/her ability to remain “fierce” and “fabulous” even in a room full of testosterone-filled firefighters.
Stacy-Ann, Katarzyna, Claire, and Dominique demonstrated very strong walks. Lauren was completely hopeless. And Fatima walked like a Clydesdale, according to Miss J.
Later, the contestants participated in a fashion show where they modeled Tuleh. Before taking the catwalk, the girls received a surprise pep-talk from Jaslene, the winner of Cycle 8. The girls learned that the best model during the fashion show would receive a photo shoot with Jaslene in Seventeen magazine.
Most of the contestants did a pretty good job, but there were a few pitfalls ...
Whitney wound up accidentally flashing the audience -- a la Janet-Jackson -- when her breast fell out of her top. Fatima also had her own wardrobe malfunction. She buttoned her sweater incorrectly. There was no serious skin shown, but it was noticeable that the outfit was uneven.
Lauren had one of the worst runway walks ever. She almost race-walked the runway. She barely paused at the end of the stage. She was just a quick Crayola-factory blur.
Miss J looked like she was going to kill Lauren. After the show, Jaslene lit into Lauren. She even asked Lauren if she wanted to be a part of the competition. (That ain’t good, fashionistas.) Lauren held it together during the criticism, but later broke down in a confessional.
Katarzyna was picked as the winner of the challenge. She picked Amis and Marvita to accompany her during the Seventeen magazine shoot.
The girls then went back to their pad for a little rest and relaxation. No such luck for the drama-queens of this cycle.
Whitney, Amy, Fatima, Marvita and Dominique got into a tiff about Amy’s need for privacy in the bathroom. It was a pretty trivial argument: Amy didn’t want any of the models to enter the bathroom while she was taking a shower. The real problem arose when Whitney started fanning the fire. I’m sure some of the black contestants were already angry with her after last week’s episode where she joined in with Allison who was caught making fun of black women.
This week, the cameras caught Dominique whispering that Whitney reminded her of “Southern, uncultured, white trash.” (Next week’s episode appears to be an extension of this week's squabble. In the preview, Whitney is shown proclaiming that she’s not a racist.)
I hope PETA wasn’t watching this week’s Top Model photo shoot. The girls were required to pose in a meat locker wearing garments made of meat. That means Whitney’s underwear was fashioned from a slab of beef. Anya’s bra was also made of animal flesh.
Surprisingly, none of the models objected to the shoot. (Smart of them!)
The judges loved Lauren’s photo. Miss J told her that she went from a “busted up runway model to a fabulous editorial model.” The judges also gushed over Anya. They marveled at her ability to turn out high-fashion photographs. They hated Amis, who should have looked into the camera as opposed to away from it. Fatima’s snarling-face photo did not work with the judges.
In the end, Amis and Fatima were in the bottom two. Amis -- with her tacky, tacky turquoise headband and hand-me-down sweatshirt hoodie – was given the boot.
Fatima sobbed and sobbed at her near exit. She vowed to improve upon the critiques dished out by the judges.
Next week’s dramatic fight between Dominique and Whitney should be entertaining. Can’t wait to watch!
Keep catwalking!
