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July 29, 2010

Just shake the darn shaker

God bless New York, but sometimes it's too stuck up for its own good. I understand the need to make a good drink, and I appreciate the proper methods for preparing a cocktail. But after watching this video shot by the New York Times, I want to shake the mixologist -- not the drink -- and tell him to get over himself. I can only guess how much this drink costs, too. Thanks to ryan97ou for the tip.

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Posted by Sam Sessa at 2:12 PM | | Comments (9)
Categories: Bars & Clubs


While this guy goes over board, almost over seas with this, some bartenders could spend a little more time chilling shots.

Recently I ordered a shot of Kettle bruised and the bartender just gave me that lost puppy dog look. You know, she tilted her head and an ear went up. Anyway, I asked her to just shake it a lot... and it went pretty well!

1. Place feet east to west wise approximately 3.25-2.87 feet apart, with ankles pivoted inward. Do no variate this pose or the drink will be ruined.

2. Shake with the aforementioned 5 point starboard Mecca method in order to properly velocitate the liquorocity into the appropriate emulsion. Deviation from the 4th point - especially the 4th point - will result in Rabies.

3. Wash your hands three times before touching the shaker, then touch the shaker 4 times counterclockwise and wash your hands another twelve times. Reminder: keep your feet in the 2.7 foot east/west arrangement or you will explode and the drink will taste bad.

Give this guy a wetsuit some oxygen and a BP contractor pass and put him to work

@ evan -- you forgot the bit about flipping the light switch on and off four times!!! . . . . just shake it!!!!

Hmmm...thought so.

Douchebag [doosh-bag] noun
see "Eben Freeman"

I think it would be the funniest thing in the world if someone of the European persuasian could come to my folks bar and pose as a consultant and attempt to train the barmaids in this technique. Note, I did say barmaids as they have been called since before I was born and before cursing and or violence ensues I can hear the question: "shaker? that's what that silver thing is called?"

An Obssessive Complusive who should either be a dance or fitness instructer, he's wasted as a mere bartender.

Do you think James Bond with pereference, that his Martinis be "Shaken, not Stirred" be impressed and a devotee?

Having watched it without the sound and seeing the first shots of the bar showing it completely devoid of people, I am convinced that what he is actually doing is an elaborate bartender/shaman ritual to ask the bar-gods to get some customers into his bar.

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About Erik Maza
Erik Maza is a features reporter at the Baltimore Sun. He writes for several sections of the Sun paper and contributes weekly columns on music and nightlife. He also writes and edits the Midnight Sun blog. He often covers entertainment, business, and the business of entertainment. Occasionally, he writes about Four Loko, The Block, the liquor board, and those who practice "simulated sex with a potted palm tree." Before The Sun, he was a reporter at the Miami New Times. He's also written for Miami magazine, the Orlando Sentinel, the Sarasota Herald Tribune and the Gainesville Sun. Got tips? Gripes? Pitches? He's reachable at Click here to keep up with the dumb music he's listening to.

Midnight Sun covers Baltimore music, live entertainment, and nightlife news. On the blog, you'll find, among other things, concert announcements, breaking news, bars closings and openings, up-to-date coverage of crime in nightlife, new music, round-the-clock coverage of Virgin Mobile FreeFest, handy guides on bars staying open past 2 a.m. on New Year's Eve and those that carry Natty Boh on draft. Recurring features include seven-day nightlife guides, Concert News, guest reviews of bars and concerts, Wednesday Corkboard, and photo galleries, as well as reader-submitted photos. Thanks for reading.

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