If you opened a bar, what would you name it?
We've talked about the best bar names in town. We've even toyed with the best fake band names.
Now, I bring you this question: If you opened a bar, what would you name it? ...
There have been so many new bars with hilariously awful names this year, I almost want to dub 2009 the Year of the Bad Bar Name.
Now, let's counter all the bad bar names and make a list of the best hypothetical bar names out there.
Mine would be Sam's Seaside Shanty Shack. If you say the name 37 times fast, you get a free shot of Q Tonic.
What are yours?
Erik Maza is a features reporter at the Baltimore Sun. He writes for several sections of the Sun paper and contributes weekly columns on music and nightlife. He also writes and edits the Midnight Sun blog. He often covers entertainment, business, and the business of entertainment. Occasionally, he writes about Four Loko, The Block, the liquor board, and those who practice "
Comments
The Awesome Zone
Or possibly East Baltimore Beverage, Comestibles and Social Gathering Area or EBBC&SGA.
Posted by: Owl Meat GinSlinger | December 21, 2009 12:01 PM
Slow & Fruity, like my ride.
Posted by: Skittles | December 21, 2009 12:04 PM
My bar would be "Shot in the Dark" for any number of fun reasons.
Posted by: TS | December 21, 2009 12:05 PM
The Alibi.
Posted by: The Blob | December 21, 2009 12:14 PM
The Fu Bar
Posted by: Ted | December 21, 2009 12:23 PM
H1N1 - the sickest bar in town!
Posted by: Brian | December 21, 2009 12:37 PM
Josh's Place. I know, boring. But I'm an egomaniac.
Posted by: Josh | December 21, 2009 12:51 PM
Sudz
Posted by: Matt | December 21, 2009 12:54 PM
The Mynah Bird or just Bird's
Posted by: Mynah Bird | December 21, 2009 1:29 PM
Donald J.'s (after my father)
or
Fart Bar
Posted by: Evan | December 21, 2009 1:32 PM
Hahaha Fart Bar hahahha!
Posted by: Sam Sessa | December 21, 2009 1:37 PM
Closed for Renovations
Posted by: VoodooPork ■|:o) | December 21, 2009 1:40 PM
P.E.T.A - Pour Everyone Twice Asmuch
Posted by: Quintel | December 21, 2009 2:10 PM
Closed for Renovations sounds like a Jason Zink bar.
Posted by: kateebee | December 21, 2009 2:16 PM
For Sale
Posted by: Mark Twain | December 21, 2009 2:23 PM
El Baracho
Posted by: B | December 21, 2009 2:24 PM
Zink!
Or
Opening Soon
Posted by: VoodooPork ■|:o) | December 21, 2009 2:25 PM
Mt. Vernon Arts and Entertainment LLC.
Posted by: Madisonn Smarrtt Ass | December 21, 2009 2:26 PM
MaGerks
Posted by: Richard | December 21, 2009 3:47 PM
I have always liked the name Purgatory.
Valhalla is another name that I've always liked for a bar.
Halfway House....I can't take credit for that though. That was my cousin's suggestion.
Posted by: Cardwell | December 21, 2009 3:52 PM
D. T. McShakeys
Posted by: Odie B | December 21, 2009 5:11 PM
Harry Benjamin's
Posted by: hambone | December 21, 2009 5:29 PM
Not Sure;)
Posted by: Jason Z | December 21, 2009 5:55 PM
Beware of Dog
or
Nitwits
Posted by: Ideen Barimani | December 21, 2009 7:36 PM
How about
Space Available For Lease
or insert any neighborhood like one of the previous posters with the Arts and Entertainment LLC.
Druid Hill Park or North Avenue Arts and Entertainment LLC. has a nice ring to in, would put Baltimore on the nightlife map worldwide. Live and in technicolor..
Posted by: Ideen | December 21, 2009 7:39 PM
I would name my bar "The Hardware Store." That way when a guy tells his wife he is going to the hardware store, he isn't fibbing. And to be even more truthful he could say he is getting a screwdriver.
Posted by: kimmer | December 21, 2009 8:00 PM
Libations.
Posted by: Nichole | December 21, 2009 9:30 PM
I like the "Hardware Store", but how about "The Tool Box" and we can find a nice cetral location in Federal Hill!
Posted by: anonymous | December 22, 2009 8:52 AM
Stumble Inn.
Posted by: My bar | December 22, 2009 10:12 AM
The Angry Wife Saloon.
Posted by: rube Goldberg | December 22, 2009 10:21 AM
The Regal Seagull
Posted by: Larry Dallas | December 22, 2009 11:07 AM
Ted's Dad's Tavern
Posted by: Ted's Dad | December 22, 2009 11:36 AM
Stealing one of these when I buy the Red House Tavern next month. muahaha.
Posted by: kateebee | December 22, 2009 12:01 PM
Dan's Woooootering Hole
Posted by: ed | December 22, 2009 12:22 PM
Fake Band Name
Posted by: johnny dollar | December 22, 2009 12:32 PM
The Tool Box.....and I'd put it right in the middle of Fed Hill!
Posted by: 21230 | December 22, 2009 2:43 PM
The Asshattery
Posted by: Owl Meat Gravy | December 22, 2009 3:54 PM
The Ultra Baltimore Lounge...
...just because Sam loves those Ultra Lounges. :)
Posted by: Xavier | December 22, 2009 7:59 PM
Fell's Pint
© LB
Posted by: LB | December 23, 2009 12:57 AM
Home.
The word-of-mouth marketing takes care of itself.
Posted by: Abject Disaster | December 23, 2009 9:00 AM
I got it, I got it............
The Moderation Pub.
"You should only drink in Moderation......."
Posted by: Alexander D. Mitchell IV | December 23, 2009 10:37 AM
Tomato Head's Halfway Inn
Posted by: Tomato Head | December 23, 2009 8:02 PM
Padlocked.
Posted by: Chris | December 24, 2009 6:39 PM
Third Base. "The last place you go before you steal home,"
Wher do you want to go?
I don't know.
Third Base!
Apologies to Abbott & Costello.
Posted by: Billzappa | December 28, 2009 11:08 AM
The Office.
"Where have you been all night?"
"The Office."
Posted by: JoJo | December 28, 2009 12:29 PM