Japanese beer for kids
I had to read this guest post from Owl Meat Gravy twice, I was so shocked this even exists:
Kidsbeer! Kidsbeer! Kidsbeer!
The Tomomasu company of Japan once made a non-alcoholic drink for kids chock full of the guarana (twice the caffeine of coffee), with enough kick to have the little ones running up the walls.
It didn't sell very well, so they put it in a brown bottle and changed the name to Kidsbeer.
Whoosh ... turning your kid into a kinder-meth-head is much more attractive when it seems like you're getting them drunk. All the chore-doing benefits of kiddie Red Bull combined with the gateway drug priming for later alcoholism.
Kidsbeer! And I thought Shirley Temples were weird. Why not rename this an Amy Winehouse?
Note: The photo above is from the company's actual ads ...
Before rebranding they decreased the sweetness and increased its frothiness.
Satoshi Tomoda, company president said, "Children copy and mimic adults. If you get this drink ready on such occasions as events and celebrations attended by kids, it would make the occasions even more entertaining." I'll bet.
"Even kids cannot stand life unless they have a drink," is Kidsbeer's slogan.
Hang on kids, maybe it will come to the U.S, soon. Now if only we could get candy cigarettes back, because nothing goes with a Kidsbeer like a kid's Camel filterless.
(Photo courtesy of Kaku Kurita/Gamma)