The Smoker's Helmet, etc.
Elizabeth Large forwarded me this comment from Owl Meat Genius:
I always thought smoking should be allowed anywhere as long as it didn't bother anyone. Solution: The Smoker's Helmet.
It's a clear bubble helmet that keeps all the smoke inside until your lungs naturally filter it out. It never caught on as an idea.
Similarly, I would propose the soundproof baby bubble, which is a lot like a hamster ball. I'm still working out the kinks in my Toddler in a Bag device.
Less philosophically similar is the Frat Boy Harness. This gives an electric shock of various strengths for high fiving, yelling woo-hoo for any reasons, saying bro-ham, or using beer in any time announcement, as in in "Its beer-thirty, man." Extra shock for adding "man" to the ending of any sentence.
OMG, if you invented either of these things, I'd gladly be your guinea pig.