I'll have the eau de boeuf, thanks
All I can say is that this is my favorite Owl Meat Gravy guest post ever. EL
August 13, 2009
August 6, 2009
Mixing your vegetables
In today's excellent Owl Meat Thursday, our guest poster intuitively understands something about fine cuisine, thereby giving his post an actual news peg. (The movie Julie & Julia opens tomorrow.) When Julia Child makes boeuf bourguignon, Owlie, she cooks the vegetables separately, then puts them with the meat at the very end to retain the separate flavors. Here's the Owl Man. EL
I was watching an episode of the show Monk. Adrian Monk is a brilliant detective with severe OCD. During dinner with a friend he separated his vegetable "medley" into different piles on his plate. His friend said, "No, you're supposed to eat them together."
Why? ...
July 30, 2009
Crab cake bling
In today's guest post, Professor OMG tackles a profound question, one that I addressed obliquely in an earlier post but had no answer for. Trust Owlie to come through for us. Here's Owl Meat Thursday. EL
Something is awry with our humble meat loaf of the sea. On a 1977 Haussner's menu a crab cake sandwich was $2.75, the same price as a sardine sandwich or a "hamburger sandwich." Crab cakes have morphed from a homely local staple to an over-hyped, perplexing, lower-quality luxury good. ...
July 23, 2009
2 kool 4 school lunch
Let me just say that my memories of school lunches involve having to eat liver and spinach on Fridays or no ice cream. Owl Meat's are a little...different. Here's guest poster Owlie. EL
Sometimes a new relationship involves fights – fevered fractious fracases full of frenzy, fried flesh, frosh and flying food. Our first independent restaurant experiences began in school cafeterias. We chose our companions and meals and practiced social skills. Over time the food got better and we stopped throwing it.
Unpacking my totally uncool red-and-black-plaid lunch box in the grade school cafegymatorium in Reading, Pa. Lebanon bologna sandwich. Carrot sticks. Oreos? Oreos? Come on Oreos. Aww .. dried apricots, but I never objected like Little Gordon Ramsay (NSFW).
Junior high in Tucson, Ariz. – total freedom to eat doughnuts or get high in the desert. Everybody was divided into jocks or freaks. No respect for sardonic malcontents ... yet. ...
July 16, 2009
13 signs you don't want to eat there
Welcome to my life, Owl Meat. EL
Sometimes there are subtle signs that a restaurant might not be for you.
• You have to construct your own burger, pasta, etc. from a menu of 50 ingredients. Be a chef already.
• Bathrooms with ambiguous male/female silhouettes. Or labels like Knights/Damsels, Dudes/Dudettes, or Caballeros/Caballeras. Dios mio! My bladder is exploding.
• They display a yellowed award that is over ten years old.
• A place called Prometheus' Buffet where an eagle eats your liver – every day. Caveat emptor. Any restaurant named Caveat Emptor should also be avoided. (Don't worry the Latin/art history part is over). ...
Prometheus (1868) Gustave Moreau
July 9, 2009
Food super powers
Guest poster Owl Meat has come up with a new game for this week's excellent Funtastic Thursday. I would play but I'm still trying to get past the concept of Owlie watching Gilligan's Island. EL
There was an episode of Gilligan's Island where radioactive seeds washed up on the island. Each vegetable gave one of the castaways a cliché super-power. Gilligan ate spinach and had great strength. Maryanne ate carrots and had super vision. Mrs. Howell ate sugar beets and became a full-on hard-tweakin' crank-head.
Here's a new game. You pick the food and the superpower it would give you or wish it would. It can be any kind of food or beverage. It doesn't have to have any traditional association.
I'll go first: ...
July 2, 2009
What I want to eat, drink, and listen to right now
As I'm reading this fantastic Funtastic Thursday guest post from Owl Meat, I'm trying to decide what I want for dinner, drink and music.
This would be the music for some reason, maybe because I'm on vacation, and the food would be straight picnic fare, but including cucumber sandwiches, with iced tea for a drink. Here's Owlie. EL
You are stranded on the proverbial desert island. You find a lamp. You rub it and a genie appears. He says that you can have any food, beverage and music for dinner. What do you ask for? It isn't your last meal. It's just what you want today.
Over the past few weeks I polled people for their choices. I also included one of my own. I'm sure you can guess from the photo what my wish was. I was a little surprised by how quickly people answered the question. ...
Continue reading "What I want to eat, drink, and listen to right now" »
June 25, 2009
Deals from your favorite chains
I'm always happy when Owl Meat addresses the recession because of his vast and superior knowledge of economic issues. His thoughtful and insightful analyses bring a little class to Dining@Large. Here's Owlie with today's Funtastic Thursday guest post. EL ...
June 18, 2009
Clambake at Dewey Beach
Owl Meat says he has no Funtastic Thursday for Beach Week, and in fact doesn't particularly like beaches, so he's letting Amanda C. write a guest post for his guest post spot. Here she is. EL
My stepbrother says that Clambake is his favorite Elvis movie. That seems odd to me, since my first memory of a clambake involved him, and my first success at thwarting his tyranny (not to be my last).
Our families were, as they say now, blending, and all of a sudden I had two stepbrothers. One of them was a sweet grumpy little boy named Liam who was three years younger than me. I nicknamed him "Bear." The other was Bobby, an obstreperous boy slightly older than me. We just didn't get along.
So we all went to Dewey Beach, Del. Previous outings were iffy at best. Bobby was either moody/sullen or mischievous/mean. Boys! I adored four-year-old Liam, because, well just because. The Other One was a major pain. ...
June 11, 2009
Salad daze
Owl Meat seems to feel a little negative about his guest post today -- at least he calls it "subdued," which of course means that I love it. (OK, I did have to kill out the photo of Johnny Cash dressed as Barnabas.) Here's the Owl Man. EL
"You don't win friends with salad.
– Homer Simpson"
My mother's salad was a monument to consumer choice and refrigerated long-haul trucking. Her salad-palooza was hewn of iceberg lettuce, cucumbers, carrots, onions, bell peppers, tomatoes, radishes, mushrooms, olives, celery, croutons, molly bolts, shiny rocks, and root beer bottle caps. It was a tribute to year-round produce, a nutritious shotgun blast of freedom of choice gone wild. ...
June 4, 2009
Cheerios are baby crack and other childish horrors
That Owl Meat. He gets me every time.
I am a parent, and I started off well, breast feeding and then making my own baby food. But one day I found Gailor and myself on the front steps eating Fritos out of the giant economy bag.
What happened?
Here's Owl Meat with an intriguing guest post. EL
Monsanto's new research division KMFDM in Borken North Rhine-Westphalia, Germany, is launching a multi-phase GMO program called Wissenschaftkinder (Science Babies). In one experiment, corn was genetically modified to contain bioluminescent genes extracted from myoclonic krill and a rare jellyfish (Aequorea victoria). When laboratory animals consume the corn, they emit bioluminescence similar to that in fireflies. ...
Continue reading "Cheerios are baby crack and other childish horrors" »
May 28, 2009
How to eat corn on the cob
I admit my title for this fine Funtastic Thursday is completely misleading, but I wanted to lure in all those new people who commented on How to Butter Corn. This is actually a pretty accurate description of how I eat corn on the cob -- I just didn't realize how scary it was. Here's guest poster Owl Meat. EL
I spent a lot of time at my friend Jimmy's house when I was about six or seven. Jimmy's father Woody had a barber shop in the front of the house. It was the place to be. He had grass in his tiny row house yard and a finished basement with a record player, a drum set, and his father's ancient Elvis Presley records. Not the good ones, but effluvial soundtracks like "Clambake" and "Speedway." That was the music from the late '60s that I got to hear? What a rip-off. ...
May 25, 2009
Bonfires, joyful chaos and food on sticks
Here's Owl Meat's missing Funtastic Thursday Memorial Day post, missing because I managed to publish the wrong one last Thursday. It was worth waiting for. EL
Before I became an urban monk, I had an abundance of pastoral family outings in Pennsylvania. The photo with little brother Liam was taken at the cottage where we escaped the urban fervor and concrete back yard for family cookouts. In the lovely dark, deep woods a cookout could escalate into a weekend of bonfires, joyful chaos, and roasting food on sticks.
As a city dweller I was discouraged from experimenting with fire. Not so in the country. The elements were our toys. We were masters of creation and destruction. I once stepped in melted marshmallows in my new white Keds. Instead of scraping it off, I decided to be clever. I put my foot at the edge of the fire and burned the marshmallow off. Ow, ow ... my foot is on fire! Keds burn too. To quote David St. Hubbins, "It's such a fine line between stupid and clever." ...
Continue reading "Bonfires, joyful chaos and food on sticks" »
May 21, 2009
The forbidden sandwich
Owl Meat's title, Feral Cat Lunch, for his intriguing guest post was much better than mine, but perhaps too obscure to bring in the masses of readers it deserves. Just the idea of his working at an animal rights magazine has made my day. EL
Feral Cat Lunch
Years ago I worked at an animal rights magazine, which was hypocritical since I believe that animals have the right to be delicious. Animal food products were forbidden in the office (for humans).
That was the summer of vegetable juicing, Emily, and biking to work, so I rolled with it. ...
May 14, 2009
Yes, in hard times you can eat your business cards
I love this Funtastic Thursday guest post from Owl Meat. I have to agree with him, that's the most amazing video ever. I should retire and let him (Owl Meat, not the guy in the video) take over the whole blog. EL
I was looking for new Owl Meat business cards and found this amazing video. He is right – my cards are wretched. They don't even pop up. Still, I wondered if a pop-up $4 business card was the best.
What makes the ultimate business card? Meat and lasers. Welcome to the brave chewy new world of MeatCards.Com. ...
Continue reading "Yes, in hard times you can eat your business cards" »
May 7, 2009
You're being ad
Guest poster Owl Meat has come up with one of those topics I wish I had thought of first. I should ask all of you to post every example of a food product placement on a TV show you notice in the next week. I wonder how many we'd come up with? The one that drives me crazy, although it's not a food, is that everybody on TV uses Macs, not PCs. Now I'm a Mac person, but I know what they are good for and what they aren't. And my guess is that it would be hard to find a company other than Apple (food reference) that used nothing but Macbooks. But I digress. Here's guest poster Owlie. EL
Product placement is when a company pays to have their product featured in a television show or film usually as a prop or part of the background. Ever wonder why the President and his cabinet are drinking Diet Mr. Pibb on 24? The idea is that if Jack Bauer drinks Diet Pibb then maybe you can stay up for a day fighting implausible terrorists and your cell phone battery will never need to be charged. ...
April 30, 2009
The twitter patter of restaurant tweets
I was so excited by this fabulous Funtastic Thursday, one of my favorites ever and originally scheduled for May 7, that I begged guest poster Owl Meal Gravy to let me publish it earlier. What I didn't say was that by May 7 Twitter would probably be over. After all, when Gailor disses something, that's it. EL
There are two things that I know to be true. First, that the Carpenters' song "Superstar" is a great song and the Sonic Youth cover is unironic, sincere and beautiful. Second, that the English are nasty, brutish and short on good food. Oh yeah, and third, I don't want to be buried in a pet cemetery.
A recent article on the (Manchester) Guardian Web site says that Twitter may be the best tool for restaurant reviews. For the untwitting, Twitter is a free instant message service where you can send a "tweet" of your life minutiae to millions of strangers. Here's the catch or the benefit – your message can only have 140 characters. ...
Continue reading "The twitter patter of restaurant tweets" »
April 23, 2009
Lunch at Frankie's house
I love this post because I still remember with horror X number of years later when I was a little girl and went to a friend's house for lunch. I was served, aarrrgghh, Campbell's cream of mushroom soup. I couldn't eat it. But I couldn't not eat it. Misery. Here's guest poster Owl Meat with his Funtastic Thursday. EL
Remember the good old days when mothers stayed home and raised their kids? I don't. The inspiration for this week's post comes from things that my friend's stay-at-home mother, Mrs.Klondike, made for us. ...
April 9, 2009
The cheesiest post yet
At a time when upscale mac 'n' cheese is one of the trendiest foods around, guest poster Owl Meat brings us back to earth with his insightful examination of the original version. EL
Don't hurry, puff and wheeze, there's a main dish that's a breeze.
– World War II era radio ad
Times may be tough now, but 1937 was a real downer. The Hindenburg went kaboom; Amelia Earhart lost her luggage; and my great-grandfather hauled a wheelbarrow full of money to the Bergdorfschneider to buy a cardboard belt.
In these dark times perched upon the brink of the abyss, it would take the ingenuity of a young country with lofty ideals and a robust belief in the transformative power of technology to lead the world into a new era.
That country was the United States of America, and the clarion blast of hope for the future came in a box – Kraft Macaroni & Cheese. ...
April 2, 2009
Cool fusion
Owl Meat has been with us only sporadically the last couple of weeks because of internet connection woes. (We all feel your pain, Owlie.) So you can imagine my delight when I opened my inbox this morning and found a fantastic Funtastic Thursday waiting for me. Here's the Owl Man. EL
This week's topic was suggested by gal pal Christa. In some recent culinary collaborations, she was startled and/or appalled by my lack of boundaries when it came to mixing ingredients and techniques from different countries.
My recent discovery of the most awesome sandwich, the kielbasa on steamed and grilled Tandoori naan with Thai sriracha sauce is a good example. It's all about the extra texture. Don't even ask about the peanut butter, sesame and bacon sauce for cold noodles. You know you want it. ...
March 19, 2009
Welcome to the Bailout Cafe
Hi! I'm Elizabeth, your server! I'll be taking care of you today! Owl Meat is at his entertaining best with today's Funtastic Thursday guest post. EL
Welcome to the Bailout Cafe. Here are today's specials:
The Warren Buffet – An unlimited wealth of victuals but about 50 percent smaller than last year.
The Chuck Wagon Executive Bonus Lunch – If you blew your lunch money on strippers, scratch-offs and Bolivian marching powder futures, just order anything you want and it's on us! After we bring it to your table, manager Chuck Grassley will offer you two choices: Give it back or commit ritual suicide. If that doesn't appeal to you, manager Chuck Schumer will just take it off your plate and charge you for the grease stain. Then the Chucks will give you atomic wedgies and ride you out of the café like donkeys. ...
March 12, 2009
Funtastic new products from Owl Meat Labs
I have just one question for you, Owl Meat: Where do we sign up for these investment opportunities? EL
I woke up this morning after having a weird dream. Due to some court-ordered arrangement the band Queensrÿche was living with me.
Weird because I know absolutely nothing about them except for the inexplicable umlaut. I think they are from the 80s. I think about some distinctive keyboard sounds from then like the Farfisa or the ubiquitous Hammond B-3. That made me think of the keyboard sound from "99 Luftballons" and I wondered who invented the balloon.
Then I thought about filling balloons with flavor gas, and then I actually went to the U.S. Patent Office website which leads us to today's post. ...
Continue reading "Funtastic new products from Owl Meat Labs" »
March 5, 2009
I dream of Owl Meat
Owl Meat's Funtastic Thursday guest posts are getting darker and less game-filled, but also more thought-provoking. However, Owlie, sometimes a carrot is just a carrot. EL
Today's topic is food nightmares.
I don't have many nightmares about food, but considering my diet, a little late-night duck vindaloo or chicken-fried weasel might give Morpheus some extra traction. Here are some random thoughts on the subject: ...
February 26, 2009
Arizona shrimp farms and other scary things
Owl Meat has brought us some excellent farm-raised food for thought in today's Funtastic Thursday guest post. In fact, even his throw-away line would be worth a separate post: "Has tilapia become the merlot of the fish world?"
Here's the Owl man. EL
Arizona Shrimp Farms
Let this settle into your skull bucket for a moment ... Arizona shrimp farms. Now sit back and relish the rare triple oxymoron. Can I think of others? Just Holy Roman Empire. Maybe that example isn't analogous since shrimp farms do exist in Arizona, whereas the other existed but was neither holy, Roman, nor an empire. I used to live in southern Arizona, where these unholy sites exist, but I don't remember any shrimp on the beaches there. ...
Continue reading "Arizona shrimp farms and other scary things" »
February 19, 2009
How to boil water
Owl Meat makes his triumphant return to the Dining@Large pantheon of guest posters with this Funtastic Thursday. However, I have to say that I always thought you put salt in the water you're about to boil pasta in for the pasta's sake, not the water's. My bad. Here's Owlie. EL
Boil, boil, toil and trouble
Yes, I used the common misquote of the witches from Macbeth, but it serves my purpose slightly better than:
Double, double toil and trouble;Fire burn, and cauldron bubble.
In a confluence of circumstance and grudging open-mindedness, I found myself without my techno-mental exoskeleton. (My PC died a slow death.) After an initial panic attack I used the situation as an opportunity to retreat into myself and shed some layers of habit and hubris. In that spirit I set out to write this post about the simplest task in the culinary realm – boiling water. ...
January 8, 2009
Top this grocery list
All my guest posters this week are picking subjects I wish I had thought of first.
My grocery lists are always models of decorum. The problem is that I don't want anyone I know to see what's actually in my grocery cart. That's one of the hazards of being a restaurant critic. If you happen to have a box of Twinkies resting on top of the organic grape tomatoes (and, no, I never have) and you're spotted, it's all over.
But Owl Meat Groceryshopper has his own take on lists. Here he is with another fantastic Funtastic Thursday. EL
In my ongoing search for meaning in the mundane, I have landed on grocery lists. Yahtzee! The list to the right is from grocerylists.org, a site that has collected nearly 2,000 found grocery lists. ...
January 1, 2009
Surefire hangover cures
Owl Meat starts out the new year with just what we need. Thank you, Owlie. Did I mention that you drink a lot of malbec when you're in Buenos Aires? Wow. These computer keys are really loud. EL
You have all heard the expression "hair of the dog," meaning that the best cure for a hangover is more of what got you there. Did you know that the expression comes from an old belief that a cure for rabies was to put the hairs from the dog that bit you on the wound?
I suspect that more than a few people are looking for relief today after whatever happened last night, so here is my guide to ancient and exotic hangover cures: ...
December 25, 2008
A Merry Owl Meatmas
It's always scary when our friend Owl Meat's regular Funtastic Thursday post happens to fall on a kinder, gentler day like Christmas. But here he is, mellower than usual. Perhaps he's gotten into the eggnog. EL
Here at stately Owl Manor, we have eschewed the usual sturm und drang, weltschmerz and schadenfreude today and have given in to Christmas - Owl Meat style. The result is a feast that combines the Mexican and German parts of my family.
First up is El Vez doing a killer version of Feliz Navidad. If you don't love this video, you have no soul. For those not familiar with El Vez, he is the Mexican Elvis and he LOVES Christmas. Does it get any better than Melvis dancing with a giant inflatable Santa and Frosty, while his band lays down some chunky Ramones-style thrash? I want his suit.
The Germans have an interesting character named Krampus. Krampus is Saint Nick's evil assistant. He is bad cop to Santa's good cop. Krampus Night is celebrated on December 5, the eve of Saint Nick's birthday. So what does Santa's assistant do? He, meaning any able-bodied man, roams the streets sometimes wielding a small birch tree branch and wears a scary mask to frighten children, Halloween-style.
Now how do we combine such seemingly non-intersecting cultures and traditions at Christmas? With food, of course. ...
December 18, 2008
The worst food in America
This is such a good Funtastic Thursday from Owl Meat that I'm going to let him get away with shilling his blog not once but twice in one entry AND publish another weird photo that looks like he created it while on crack cocaine. Not to mention that my heart stopped when he linked to Porn Flakes. EL
It's been a busy week. While I have been collecting unusual and sometimes frightening food poetry over at the Owl Meat Apocrypha, I have been slacking on my funstasmic duties. Not too worry, I found a list that purports to name the very worst foods in America. None of them has murderous intentions or inspires sleeplessness, so how bad could they be? Killjoy rag Men's Health has come out with their list of "The 20 Worst Foods in America." Oh really? ...
December 11, 2008
Gastronauts
Today Owl Meat goes boldly where no man has gone before for his Funtastic Thursday, one of the most fun Thursdays we've had in quite a while. EL
December 4, 2008
Robot pancakes and other unnecessary evils of technology
This Funtastic Thursday interests me because I don't usually succumb to kitchen gadgets, but I did within the history of this blog. It was the Handi-Vac, which sometimes works and sometimes doesn't, and reminds me why I shouldn't buy stupid kitchen gadgets every time I try to use it. My I-can't-live-without-it gadget? My nutmeg grinder. But that's another story. EL
Continue reading "Robot pancakes and other unnecessary evils of technology" »
November 27, 2008
Fewer words, more pie
Owl Meat has come up with a delicious ending to our festivities today. His original title sounded much better: "Less Words, More Pie," but I knew I would never get it past McIntyre. EL
November 20, 2008
Exploding food
I was going to do a post on popcorn this week. I just hadn't gotten around to it.
Sunday night I popped my own popcorn for the first time in, I don't know, years. My recipe is simple: You take a big skillet with a tight-fitting lid, cover the bottom with one layer of popcorn (I used organic for the first time) and shake it constantly over medium high heat until it's so popped it almost pushes the lid up.
In spite of what the Owl Man says below, this works better than using oil because then the popcorn absorbs the enormous amounts of real butter I pour on it better. I had a fleeting moment of considering melting the butter in the microwave, thought better of it, and heated a large bowl in the microwave instead. Then I put the popcorn in it, melted the butter in the skillet (I'm embarrassed to tell you how much), poured it over the still-hot popcorn and tossed it with salad implements. Then I ground salt and black pepper over it and tossed it again.
Anyway, Owl Meat scooped me, so I won't be able to do that post now. Here's his excellent Funtastic Thursday. EL
November 13, 2008
What kind of pizza eater are you?
Owl Meat is back in full feather this week. In today's Funtastic Thursday he asks this provocative question: What kind of pizza eater are you? EL
October 30, 2008
Sarah Palin's Halloween party
Although Owl Meat didn't know it at the time, my daughter went to a Halloween party last night as...Sarah Palin!!!! Amazing coincidence!!!!
Here's the Owl Man with a very topical Funtastic Thursday.
If anyone wants to riff on Obama's Halloween party, just post below. And be sure to include some food. EL...
October 23, 2008
Flavored air
I bet you thought Owl Meat had forgotten us again. Not so. Here he with yet another funtastic Thursday treat for us. You Could Not Make This Stuff Up. EL
I woke up yesterday dreaming of monkey bread at the ominous time of 4:56 a.m. Cat Power was counting down singing "Ground Control to Major Tom," and my first thought was "flavored air."
A day that starts like that can only end in a complete meltdown, which it did. I found this product, flavored compressed oxygen from Big Ox, that comes in these dubious "flavors": mountain mint, citrus blast, polar rush, tropical breeze and rainbow. My pet unicorn JingleJangle says that rainbow is his favorite flavor. ...
October 16, 2008
Name that pasta
Here's Owl Meat and his latest fantastic Funtastic Thursday diversion. Remember, you can look up the answers on the Internet; but that would be cheating, wouldn't it? EL
Gnocchi Docchi
Time to sort through the leaves and twigs of the Nest of Solitude for a refreshing new diversion. My muse and quoits partner Bourbon Girl suggested that I create a new game for today and nothing too brain-hurty.
Researchers read a list of English phrases to French speakers who didn't know their meaning. The most beautiful sounding phrase in English to French ears: cellar door. Cellar door. Some food names also sound better in foreign languages. For example, crème brûlée has a nice ring to it, better than scorched cream (plus three different diacritical marks in three syllables). Zut alors! Perhaps to German or Uzbeki ears "meat balls" is euphonious and not just a graceless description of a wad o' meat.
The root of the word lasagna comes from the Latin lasanum or chamber pot. Hmmm ... not so tasty etymology. Etymology, that's the little green soybeans you get at sushi bars, right?
Below are some more fanciful translations or roots of various kinds of pasta. How many can you guess? ...
October 9, 2008
Really bad restaurant concepts
OK, boys and girls, it looks like we're back in business. Owl Meat has come up with a fantastic Funtastic Thursday, which totally makes up for his deserting us last week.
Here's what he has for us:
"Sorry for the lack of funtasm last week. I needed to recharge my depleted fun cells. With the help of several unripe mangos, the Gnostic Gospels, and a car battery I'm back in action!
I met a guy at Minato's sushi bar a few years ago who told me about a restaurant he wanted to open on Key Highway. He had the building, the concept, and the financing. All he needed was approval from the city. His concept ..."
September 25, 2008
Funtastic Seinfeld food moments
For today's Funtastic Thursday, Owl Meat has done a great roundup of fantastic food moments on Seinfeld.
At least I think it's a great roundup because I never saw an episode of Seinfeld.
What I was struck by was how many of these I had heard about anyway.
Here's the Owl Man:...
September 18, 2008
Red, white and blue bottoms up!
This Funtastic Thursday needs no introduction, so I'll turn it directly over to Owl Meat:
"Welcome to another All-American Funtastic Thursday, faithful groms and gromettes. Last week's Political Sandwich edition seemed popular, so if you are munching on a Dennis Kusandwich, which is rather dry, you are going to want a cocktail to wash it down and dull the depression of having made that choice (secret shout out to Monkey Girl).
Barack Obama says that he likes a beer at a baseball game and Hillary Clinton looked like a frat house townie chick on spring break chugging Presidente beer (irony alert) from a bottle and doing shots of Wild Turkey on the campaign trail. Woo hoo, you deserve a few, girlfriend, it ain't easy being green.
John McCain says that his favorite cocktail is Stoli on the rocks. His time in the Hanoi Hilton gets him a lifetime free pass on practically everything, but that's not a very American drink, Comrade McCain. I'm not suggesting that he is a brain-washed automaton like in The Manchurian Candidate. I'm not saying that at all. Really. It's not like he picked an unknown zealot running mate from that country above Canada, who brags that she can see Russia from the semaphore tower at her Alaskan dacha, er..., home.
That's crazy talk. ...
September 11, 2008
Four score and seven sandwiches ago
No, Owl Meat didn't abandon us today. He's back with an even more Funtastic Thursday than usual.
Here's Owlie...
"Portrait of the Artist as a Funtastic Tyke. How adorable is Little Owl Meat? Look closely and you will see that I was already practicing the art of Sandbox domination. I loved the smell of Play-Doh in the morning. It smelled like ... Victory!
... and now for the Main Attraction ...
September 4, 2008
Of monkey roundups, Sarah Palin and dream foods
I would like to write a snappy introduction to Owl Meat's Funtastic Thursday, but for once I'm stumped. On the other hand, it may be my favorite one yet. Here's the Owl Man: ...
Continue reading "Of monkey roundups, Sarah Palin and dream foods" »
August 28, 2008
What a (Kitchen) Tool!
I hope you didn't try to adjust your set. There were technical difficulties, but now Owl Meat has come through with Dining@Large Crossword No. 3, What a Tool! Here's what he had to say about it:
"Cars on the highway, planes in the air
Everyone else is going somewhere
But I’m going nowhere, getting there too
I might as well just sink down with you
- Fountains of Wayne
Glug glug. Why so glum chum? Not glum, in fact, ebullient that the summer heat is almost over and I'm taking scuba and spear-fishing lessons for a trip to Baku in November. With any luck I will bag one of those elusive Caspian Tigerfish -- ha tah!
Today's Funtastic Thursday clambake of merriment is the third and probably final crossword puzzle for a while. These are hard to make! My brain box hurts a little and I think that the crossword-making area is depleted. I'm depleted! Oh well, on to other 'tastic pursuits. You will note that my new mastery of Photoshop has allowed for the return of some of our mystery friends. ...
August 21, 2008
Action in the kitchen and other fun things for Thursday
Our fun friend Owl Meat has come up with another food-oriented crossword for us, but we need some ground rules. What do you think? How long should we give people to work on it before allowing anyone to shout out the answers? On the other hand, maybe it should be a group activity?
Here's what the Owl has to say about his puzzle:
"Blistering heat, Weltschmerz and too much free time ... what's a boy to do? After kicking my withering addiction to huffing ditto masters, I've got all kinds of time and brain space. So here is the second Dining@Large crossword puzzle ... now with 33 percent more. Bigger, meatier, and more themey. Plus welcome back Funtastic Thursday's mascot happy flaming banana thing whose true identity will be revealed in a future puzzle.
Today's theme is 'Action in the Kitchen'! There are 12 answers that are forms of verbs used in restaurant kitchens and lots of other food-related clues and answers. There is also an obscure Seinfeld reference and the new verb 'Schnabelled.'
Because you are such clever monkeys, I made some of the clues more tricky. For example: Our country is messed up on golf gear = SAUTEES (USA 'messed up' + Tees) Oh yeah. This is where we separate the maguro from the toro.
Good luck. ..."
Continue reading "Action in the kitchen and other fun things for Thursday" »
August 14, 2008
The Owl's Restaurant/Food Crossword Puzzle
He's baaaack. Just when you thought it was safe to read this blog again.
I have the feeling this puzzle is going to be hard. (I haven't tried it, so that's just a guess.) I would suggest, if everyone gets stuck, after a reasonable amount of time you magnanimously share answers below and split the magnificent gift basket when you win.
Now here's Owl Meat Gravy:
Welcome back to Funtastic Thursdays. As you can see Snickers has been captured by some weird cult that worships a demented anthropomorphic locomotive.
For my return I created a crossword puzzle especially for Dining@Large. I don't do this professionally, so it doesn't have the symmetric design that the pros use. What it does have is a lot of food-related clues and answers and some that are specific to Dining@Large. Beware, the clues are very Owl Meaty.
This week's prize is tremendous. I have assembled a gift basket that includes:
(1) Some scrumptious Sylvester Stallone pudding because when I think tasty pudding, I think Sly Stallone.
(2) Play-Doh-scented cologne to attract ladies who are, uh, ... ovulating?
(3) Cheetos-flavored lip balm because why not?
(4) NASCAR Tony Stewart branding iron for all your NASCAR-specific branding needs. ...
Continue reading "The Owl's Restaurant/Food Crossword Puzzle" »
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About this blog
Richard Gorelick was appointed The Baltimore Sun's restaurant critic in September 2010. Before joining the paper staff fulltime, he contributed freelance criticism and features articles about food to area and regional publications. Along the way, he dispatched for short-distance trucking companies, shilled for cultural non-profits, and assisted in cognitive neurology research – never the subject, always the control.
He takes restaurants seriously but not himself, and his favorite restaurant is the one you love, too.
He takes restaurants seriously but not himself, and his favorite restaurant is the one you love, too.
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