If only. In this story, there will be no later scenes in which I redeem myself with brilliant dectecting or raw good-at-heart self-sacrifice. In fact it gets worse: I arrived late because I got lost because I wasn’t paying attention.
 
I discovered the shoe flaw (I’m getting to the food part) in the car after it was too late to turn back. I discovered the fly flaw after the service and the cocktail hour, just as we were being seated for dinner. I excused myself, hunker-walked to a secluded redoubt and zipped up. Then came dinner. 

My experiences with large scale wedding buffets set me up for a pleasant surprise at The Morningside Inn. The kitchen delivered flavor and freshness and did it while staying in bounds of the mass palate array goal of committing the least possible offense to the largest possible number.
 
I opted for the mashed potatoes because I saw the red skins were left in. You don’t usually get that from a box. The spuds were subtly seasoned, fresh, fluffy. The chicken with wild rice in cream sauce was distinctly herby and not overcooked or rendered rubbery under a heat lamp. The penne in marinara had zip without committing an outrageous taste sensation that might have alarmed the church-basement spaghetti set. Everything, in fact, suggested skill and good timing.
 
Morningside offered comfort food that didn’t look different from so many other banquet standards. But they got it right on flavor and freshness. Maybe they feel they have to try harder because they’re surrounded by vast rolling farm fields — the site’s photos do not capture the isolation of the place, which is a good measure of its charm.
 
So there. A wedding buffet review. My first. And no clever wrap-up that miraculously synthesizes brown shoes with black suit and open fly into a neat denouement that perfectly captures the thrills and perils of marriage.
 
I can, however, leave you with this discovery: not all greatness comes in a neat package and, sometimes, what we really need is a Bad Boy. If you’re a cigar smoker, the next time you’re in Westminster, check out this gem of a cheroot. Amazing.
 
 
Photo by Johnny Ioannidis courtesy stock xchng