Top 10 Signs You’re a Foodie
We've talked about what makes someone a foodie before, but I don't think any of us articulated it as precisely as John Lindner has in this guest post Top 10. Thanks, John, for making it a little easier to come back from vacation today.
Here's John with the Top 10 Signs You're a Foodie: ...
1. You remember where you were and what you were doing when you heard that Martick’s closed.
2. You know that basmati is not the capital of India.
3. Your meal is ruined when you’re served from your left (or right – the point is, darn it, it matters).
4. You know the real CIA is a school in New York.
5. You can tell by scent as soon as you enter the restaurant which four cheeses they use in their quattro formaggi sauce and in your opinion they went a little overboard on the Asiago.
6. You would starve to death if you were trapped for 40 days in a fully stocked Olive Garden.
7. Not only do you know what cuy is, you know where to find it outside Ecuador and Peru.
8. You sample bread from a wood-fired oven and turn up your nose at the hint of insufficiently aged elm.
9. You spell Kryptonite M A R G A R I N E.
10. You’re keenly aware that the first word in diet is “die."
(David Hobby/Sun photographer)
Comments
Good one, JL. Have to disagree only with number 6. Olive Garden has some specials that are really good, like the braised lamb short ribs that I had the pleasure of once.
Posted by: Joyce W. | October 6, 2009 5:54 AM
I think number 8 is a bit over the top. Everyone knows that elm is a wood you burn for heat, not flavour.
Posted by: Lissa | October 6, 2009 5:56 AM
11. You tell everyone at the table that you wish your dish had a bit more acid to heighten the flavors
Posted by: Corey | October 6, 2009 6:54 AM
You're relieved that you never got around to putting out all those back-issues of Gourmet Magazine with the recycling.
Posted by: Laura Lee | October 6, 2009 7:57 AM
I think 3 should be "you don't care if the food is served from the left, the right. or if you have to pick it up at the counter, if the food tastes good it just doesn't matter."
You are a super foodie if you know the CIA is also in the former Christian Brothers winery in the Napa Valley and under the influence of way too much Zinfandel at Mustards you spend $100 on an embroidered jean jacket in the gift shop.
I have to admit will have to google cuy.
Posted by: Elite Elephant Lover | October 6, 2009 8:48 AM
10. You are a pretentious jerk who likes to feel superior solely because of your diet.
Posted by: Anonymous | October 6, 2009 8:49 AM
This list is hysterical. I love it when people poke fun at themselves.
Posted by: Greg | October 6, 2009 8:51 AM
My father always said if you hold a cuy by the tail its eyes will fall out.
Posted by: Elite Elephant Lover | October 6, 2009 8:54 AM
If the following "crab cake" recipe makes you want to vomit:
http://recipe.aol.com/recipe/crab-cakes-with-homemade-tartar-sauce/85026#reviews
Posted by: Anonymous | October 6, 2009 8:59 AM
i almost ate cuy 4 times in my life but just couldn't. Reason: only animal too cute to eat. Dogs, rabbits, i really don't care either way...but cuy no way!
Posted by: aaron | October 6, 2009 9:01 AM
Good point Lissa. Mesquite, hickory, apple/pear etc., but never elm. Why you'd be using pine next!
Posted by: billzappa | October 6, 2009 10:11 AM
I realize this is tongue-in-cheek, but come on! You make foodies sound like totally pretentious jerks.
Posted by: Bill | October 6, 2009 10:41 AM
Why does being a foodie have to mean that one is pretentious and high brow?
Though Gourmet magazine just went under, their foodies would be just as interested in an (uninteristing) dinner in Baltimore's Little Italy as they would be in the crispy fried goodness of lake trout.
I think you may be taking this Top 10, and John, a little too seriously. EL
Posted by: Cheese | October 6, 2009 10:46 AM
Reading this post makes me not want to read any other Sun dining articles, columns, blogs ... this is just way off base, rude, unfunny, and doesn't serve any purpose other than to take up space.
Posted by: David | October 6, 2009 11:17 AM
Unlike, say -- (accidentally, admittedly) triple-posting?
Just sayin.
Should I leave all five of his duplicate posts? Nah, that would be too mean. :-) EL
Posted by: El Generalissimo | October 6, 2009 11:22 AM
You made me laugh out loud, jl!
Posted by: Eve | October 6, 2009 11:49 AM
Great list. For knowing if you're a Baltimore foodie, I would add:
--You can easily tell the difference between Old Bay and J.O.
and
--You care if the ice in your snowball is crushed or shaved.
Posted by: baltoellen | October 6, 2009 12:28 PM
You’re a foodie if you reminisce about a vacation by recalling the meals you ate.
Posted by: Bob | October 6, 2009 12:49 PM
apparently you're a foodie if you are easily annoyed by undercase caps, bold and italicized type
Posted by: unbelievaboh | October 6, 2009 12:58 PM
I agree with Bob's assessment. Being able to recall the meals you ate during any event would probably qualify you as a foodie.
Posted by: NotableM | October 6, 2009 1:22 PM
Hi...my name's Doug, and I'm a foodie.
I, uh, fell off the wagon a little bit. It's been 30 minutes since I wished I had a little bit of acid for the food I was eating.
Thanks for reading.
Posted by: Doug | October 6, 2009 2:12 PM
For the record, it was a dish of figs, bleu cheese, and toasted almonds.
Posted by: Doug | October 6, 2009 2:13 PM
if you're a regular commenter on a food blog? =)
hi.
Posted by: Matt | October 6, 2009 2:24 PM
You're a foodie if your entire vacation is scheduled around the meals you have planned.
You're a foodie if you live in St. Louis, are in Arizona for a seminar, and fly home through San Francisco just to eat.
You're a foodie if you pass up free convention food for good local food you have to pay for out of pocket.
Posted by: Elite Elephant Lover | October 6, 2009 2:56 PM
I just downloaded photos from our most recent trip. I hate to think how many photos we took of what we ate and drank. Yes, I am a foodie. But I draw the line at eating cuy or any other animal that would be cute in a Disney cartoon with googly eyes.
Posted by: Dahlink | October 6, 2009 3:08 PM
Dahlink, do you eat lamb?
Posted by: Bob | October 6, 2009 3:50 PM
I know it's a joke and all ... but I hate the word "foodie." :-(
Posted by: ET | October 6, 2009 3:53 PM
Bill, are you trying to make the argument that we're not totally pretentious jerks?
Embrace your inner foodie Bill, get comfortable in your own skin.
Posted by: Corey | October 6, 2009 4:13 PM
Dahlink, sounds like you should give us a trip report.
Posted by: Hal Laurent | October 6, 2009 4:44 PM
Swerve: The picture of Martick's looks like an Edward Hopper painting.
Posted by: bra1nchild | October 6, 2009 5:03 PM
Bob, not very often.
Hal Laurent, I will just say this: everyone eats well in Belgium.
And bra1nchild, I had exactly the same reaction to the photo.
Posted by: Dahlink | October 6, 2009 5:32 PM
Dahlink, a description of the food on a Belgian trip would be wonderful reading. Might be hard to do at this point if you didn't keep notes, though. On the other hand, you did say you have lots of photos.
Posted by: Hal Laurent | October 6, 2009 6:07 PM
Hal, I'm still catching up with the more than 300 emails (just at home) that came while we were away. Maybe later ... But I can say that we did not have a bad meal and I'm hoping to go back again!
Posted by: Dahlink | October 6, 2009 7:35 PM
bra1nchild, I agree. And I think a bunch of us thought that when the pic ran with another story too.
Posted by: Joyce W. | October 6, 2009 7:40 PM
Actually, the "CIA" in Napa is the FBI--the Food and Beverage Institue.
Posted by: nansea51 | October 6, 2009 7:59 PM
Pretentious? Us? How could anyone think such a thing? Why, in the pot roast I made for dinner (just for me, but pot roast makes excellent leftovers), the potatoes and garlic weren't organic and I couldn't get carrots picked by virgins! Nor do I know where in Manitoba the powered mustard was grown.
Posted by: Lissa | October 6, 2009 8:11 PM
11. You'll try the bug when offered. (It's just a hard crab that looks like a cricket...)
12. You'll happily eat the nasturtium garnish (Rule #8: Anything on the plate is edible...)
13. You know how to discreetly camouflage the bolus of eggplant and garlic puree you scrapped off the top of the eggs benedict that your sister-in-law has so thoughtfully customized...WTF?
14. You never turn away a bottle of wine unless it's obviously corked (i.e. smells like your bedroom slipper the dog chewed on.)
15. You eat with your fingers all the time and whenever you get the chance (fried chicken, crabs, asparagus, oysters, artichoke, etc.)
And so on...
Posted by: Cleatus | October 6, 2009 8:13 PM
Lissa: LOL.
Posted by: Cleatus | October 6, 2009 8:17 PM
I'd add, "You know the names of 10 chefs who don't have shows on The Food Network or who have appeared on Top Chef."
Posted by: The Canon | October 6, 2009 9:23 PM
Cleatus--best definition of "corked" I've ever read!
Posted by: Dahlink | October 7, 2009 6:53 AM
Everey 17 yrs you eat deep fried cicadas.
Posted by: RayRay | October 7, 2009 10:06 AM
Link spam at 3:16 AM! (The alleged loan people, again.)
Posted by: hmpstd | March 15, 2010 7:01 AM