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October 6, 2009

Top 10 Signs You’re a Foodie


We've talked about what makes someone a foodie before, but I don't think any of us articulated it as precisely as John Lindner has in this guest post Top 10. Thanks, John, for making it a little easier to come back from vacation today.

Here's John with the Top 10 Signs You're a Foodie: ...

1. You remember where you were and what you were doing when you heard that Martick’s closed.

2. You know that basmati is not the capital of India.

3. Your meal is ruined when you’re served from your left (or right – the point is, darn it, it matters).

4. You know the real CIA is a school in New York.

5. You can tell by scent as soon as you enter the restaurant which four cheeses they use in their quattro formaggi sauce and in your opinion they went a little overboard on the Asiago.

6. You would starve to death if you were trapped for 40 days in a fully stocked Olive Garden.

7. Not only do you know what cuy is, you know where to find it outside Ecuador and Peru.

8. You sample bread from a wood-fired oven and turn up your nose at the hint of insufficiently aged elm.

9. You spell Kryptonite M A R G A R I N E.

10. You’re keenly aware that the first word in diet is “die."

(David Hobby/Sun photographer)

Posted by Elizabeth Large at 4:29 AM | | Comments (42)
Categories: Top Ten Tuesdays


Good one, JL. Have to disagree only with number 6. Olive Garden has some specials that are really good, like the braised lamb short ribs that I had the pleasure of once.

I think number 8 is a bit over the top. Everyone knows that elm is a wood you burn for heat, not flavour.

11. You tell everyone at the table that you wish your dish had a bit more acid to heighten the flavors

You're relieved that you never got around to putting out all those back-issues of Gourmet Magazine with the recycling.

I think 3 should be "you don't care if the food is served from the left, the right. or if you have to pick it up at the counter, if the food tastes good it just doesn't matter."

You are a super foodie if you know the CIA is also in the former Christian Brothers winery in the Napa Valley and under the influence of way too much Zinfandel at Mustards you spend $100 on an embroidered jean jacket in the gift shop.

I have to admit will have to google cuy.

10. You are a pretentious jerk who likes to feel superior solely because of your diet.

This list is hysterical. I love it when people poke fun at themselves.

My father always said if you hold a cuy by the tail its eyes will fall out.

If the following "crab cake" recipe makes you want to vomit:

i almost ate cuy 4 times in my life but just couldn't. Reason: only animal too cute to eat. Dogs, rabbits, i really don't care either way...but cuy no way!

Good point Lissa. Mesquite, hickory, apple/pear etc., but never elm. Why you'd be using pine next!

I realize this is tongue-in-cheek, but come on! You make foodies sound like totally pretentious jerks.

Why does being a foodie have to mean that one is pretentious and high brow?

Though Gourmet magazine just went under, their foodies would be just as interested in an (uninteristing) dinner in Baltimore's Little Italy as they would be in the crispy fried goodness of lake trout.

I think you may be taking this Top 10, and John, a little too seriously. EL

Reading this post makes me not want to read any other Sun dining articles, columns, blogs ... this is just way off base, rude, unfunny, and doesn't serve any purpose other than to take up space.

Unlike, say -- (accidentally, admittedly) triple-posting?

Just sayin.

Should I leave all five of his duplicate posts? Nah, that would be too mean. :-) EL

You made me laugh out loud, jl!

Great list. For knowing if you're a Baltimore foodie, I would add:

--You can easily tell the difference between Old Bay and J.O.


--You care if the ice in your snowball is crushed or shaved.

You’re a foodie if you reminisce about a vacation by recalling the meals you ate.

apparently you're a foodie if you are easily annoyed by undercase caps, bold and italicized type

I agree with Bob's assessment. Being able to recall the meals you ate during any event would probably qualify you as a foodie. name's Doug, and I'm a foodie.

I, uh, fell off the wagon a little bit. It's been 30 minutes since I wished I had a little bit of acid for the food I was eating.

Thanks for reading.

For the record, it was a dish of figs, bleu cheese, and toasted almonds.

if you're a regular commenter on a food blog? =)

You're a foodie if your entire vacation is scheduled around the meals you have planned.

You're a foodie if you live in St. Louis, are in Arizona for a seminar, and fly home through San Francisco just to eat.

You're a foodie if you pass up free convention food for good local food you have to pay for out of pocket.

I just downloaded photos from our most recent trip. I hate to think how many photos we took of what we ate and drank. Yes, I am a foodie. But I draw the line at eating cuy or any other animal that would be cute in a Disney cartoon with googly eyes.

Dahlink, do you eat lamb?

I know it's a joke and all ... but I hate the word "foodie." :-(

Bill, are you trying to make the argument that we're not totally pretentious jerks?

Embrace your inner foodie Bill, get comfortable in your own skin.

Dahlink, sounds like you should give us a trip report.

Swerve: The picture of Martick's looks like an Edward Hopper painting.

Bob, not very often.

Hal Laurent, I will just say this: everyone eats well in Belgium.

And bra1nchild, I had exactly the same reaction to the photo.

Dahlink, a description of the food on a Belgian trip would be wonderful reading. Might be hard to do at this point if you didn't keep notes, though. On the other hand, you did say you have lots of photos.

Hal, I'm still catching up with the more than 300 emails (just at home) that came while we were away. Maybe later ... But I can say that we did not have a bad meal and I'm hoping to go back again!

bra1nchild, I agree. And I think a bunch of us thought that when the pic ran with another story too.

Actually, the "CIA" in Napa is the FBI--the Food and Beverage Institue.

Pretentious? Us? How could anyone think such a thing? Why, in the pot roast I made for dinner (just for me, but pot roast makes excellent leftovers), the potatoes and garlic weren't organic and I couldn't get carrots picked by virgins! Nor do I know where in Manitoba the powered mustard was grown.

11. You'll try the bug when offered. (It's just a hard crab that looks like a cricket...)
12. You'll happily eat the nasturtium garnish (Rule #8: Anything on the plate is edible...)
13. You know how to discreetly camouflage the bolus of eggplant and garlic puree you scrapped off the top of the eggs benedict that your sister-in-law has so thoughtfully customized...WTF?
14. You never turn away a bottle of wine unless it's obviously corked (i.e. smells like your bedroom slipper the dog chewed on.)
15. You eat with your fingers all the time and whenever you get the chance (fried chicken, crabs, asparagus, oysters, artichoke, etc.)
And so on...

Lissa: LOL.

I'd add, "You know the names of 10 chefs who don't have shows on The Food Network or who have appeared on Top Chef."

Cleatus--best definition of "corked" I've ever read!

Everey 17 yrs you eat deep fried cicadas.

Link spam at 3:16 AM! (The alleged loan people, again.)

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About this blog
Richard Gorelick was appointed The Baltimore Sun's restaurant critic in September 2010. Before joining the paper staff fulltime, he contributed freelance criticism and features articles about food to area and regional publications. Along the way, he dispatched for short-distance trucking companies, shilled for cultural non-profits, and assisted in cognitive neurology research – never the subject, always the control.

He takes restaurants seriously but not himself, and his favorite restaurant is the one you love, too.

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