Salad daze
Owl Meat seems to feel a little negative about his guest post today -- at least he calls it "subdued," which of course means that I love it. (OK, I did have to kill out the photo of Johnny Cash dressed as Barnabas.) Here's the Owl Man. EL
"You don't win friends with salad.
– Homer Simpson"
My mother's salad was a monument to consumer choice and refrigerated long-haul trucking. Her salad-palooza was hewn of iceberg lettuce, cucumbers, carrots, onions, bell peppers, tomatoes, radishes, mushrooms, olives, celery, croutons, molly bolts, shiny rocks, and root beer bottle caps. It was a tribute to year-round produce, a nutritious shotgun blast of freedom of choice gone wild. ...
Salad dressing? One could travel the globe just by scanning the inside of our avocado-colored Frigidaire.
In my salad days when I was green in judgment, I traveled to Italy, France, Catalina, Russia, a ranch, and the Thousand Islands with my pals Caesar, Paul Newman, and the Green Goddess.
It was her dream of hope for her children wrought in raw vegetables. So many choices. How could a boy decide? That may explain my five college majors and my reputed fear of commitment.
Yes, I blame salad. Children shouldn't have that many choices. Permissive salad-parenting is perhaps the greatest danger to the youth of tomorrow since lawn darts, acid-washed jeans, and Hugh Jackman. Wolverine!
Now I am a salad minimalist. When confronted with a tossed beast with many ingredients, I eat it one item at a time.
The ginormous Happy Hour salad at Amicci's ($5) goes like this: First, two black olives. Then, strips of grilled chicken. Then, a bite of cucumber and red onion; repeat until both are gone. Then I stare at the pepperoncini and hot cherry pepper. Sometimes they win, sometimes I win. Finally, I attack the lettuce, an arduous task of fork hunting and pecking, stabbing at romaine spine for a forkful of slaughtered cos. Senatus Populus Que Romanus!
Free yourself from the hegemony of the American super power salad. Try a more Zen salad. Pour your best olive oil in a bowl with a little fleur de sel or sea salt. Toss Boston or Bibb lettuce. Sprinkle on balsamic vinegar. Toss again. A perfect combination of four complex flavors. Salad shouldn't be a vulgar dumping ground for the hubris of a wealthy nation. It should be a work of flavor-art for the mouth and soul.
Salad bars? No. Just no. They are like a key party for germs.
Salad nightmare: Chicken Liver Salad Dressing and Pork Apple Salad.
In my vintage cookbook collection I have the Maxwell House Coffee Cookbook. It's amazing how many recipes benefit from instant coffee. The recipe for duck marinated in instant coffee and toothpaste was delicious, but the coffee-lemon salad dressing was a bit underwhelming:
1 cup sour cream
1/4 cup confectioner’s sugar
1/4 cup salad oil
1 tablespoon lemon juice
2 teaspoons instant quality coffee
Suggested listening: "Poke Salad Annie."
Ever think about having a salad to help you sleep? Maybe you should. Lactucarium is an opiate found in all types of lettuce. Ancient Romans and Egyptians served lettuce at the end of a meal to nudge diners toward the silky embrace of Hypnos and Morpheus.
If this post is a bit subdued, perhaps it's because I've been eating salad for a month and I can't stop. I've got a lettuce monkey on my back. His name is Opie.
(Photo credit: Getty Images)










Comments
Good Grief! If my partner discovers that the opiate in lettuce thing is true, she'll be eating it by the head! Better stock up on Imodium.
Posted by: Joyce W. | June 11, 2009 10:32 AM
My Mom won some contest for her brisket recipe which used instant coffee. Good stuff... it deserved to win.
When I was working at a (to remain un-named) pastry shop we would add instant coffee to the pastry cream.
back to salad... My claim to fame is that I once won the Baltimore Magazine award for Best Chef Salad. It was a thing of beauty but due to the era (mid 70's) was also principally of trucked in herbage.
Posted by: MrRational | June 11, 2009 12:11 PM
coffee makes a decent marinade because of its acidity.
Posted by: say what | June 11, 2009 12:14 PM
Since EL brought it up and I got a question about it on Facebook, yes I made reference to Johnny Cash looking like Barnabas Collins from Dark Shadows. I see that EL is on a first name basis with him. Very interesting.
Here's the line that got cut and the link for those who don't know what BC looks like:
See Johnny Cash rocking a plutonium pompadour and duded out in a Barnabas Collins down-home fancy-lad vampire suit.
http://showcase.codelphia.net/images/Old_Fashioned_Barnabas_By_Sunny_1.jpg
Did people actually watch Dark Shadows?
Posted by: Owl Meat Gravy | June 11, 2009 12:55 PM
Ah...Barnabas Collins. I thought, "St. Barnabas? Johnny Cash?"
I watched a little of Dark Shawdows because where I lived, Where The Action Is was the lead in to it. So a few times, I kept watching, after WTAI was over. But I never really got into it.
Posted by: Bucky | June 11, 2009 1:07 PM
Subdued? Maybe, but still entertaining and funny.
My sister loved watching Dark Shadows. I didn't like it though.
Posted by: PCB Rob | June 11, 2009 1:10 PM
I never watched it, but somehow Barnabas Collins is seared into my memory. I've been meaning to work him into something for awhile for some reason and then poof, Johnny cash has that weird outfit on.
What oh what is Where the Action Is?
Posted by: Owl Meat Gravy | June 11, 2009 1:15 PM
Where The Action Is was a dance show on tv in the late 60's maybe early 70's.
Paul Revere and the Raiders had a song called "Where the Action Is".
I watched Dark Shadows (clad in my smart bell bottom pantsuits - a mom thing, don't ask) every day right after school.
Posted by: Joyce W. | June 11, 2009 1:21 PM
WTAI was sort of, American Bandstand at the Beach. The "house band" was Paul Revere & The Raiders. I wanted to learn how to play the guitar and become a Raider, mostly because I thought chicks dig a uniform, so rock chicks must really dig Paul Revere and the Raiders.
Freddie Cannon had a hit with the WTAI theme song.
Posted by: Bucky | June 11, 2009 1:22 PM
So Dark Shadows was like a vampire soap opera?
Posted by: Owl Meat Gravy | June 11, 2009 1:27 PM
So Dark Shadows was like a vampire soap opera?
Yes, and a pretty bad one at that. I never watched it much, but Barnabas is seared into my brain too. Especially the character's real name: Jonathan Frid.
Posted by: PCB Rob | June 11, 2009 1:33 PM
When I was little there was something called "salad oil". What was that? Definitely not olive oil. I remember bottles just called vegetable oil. No idea what they were. My mother used to make this salad dressing from a packet of herbs and stuff. She had a little glass cruet (that's probably the first I've typed that word). She put salad oil (Mazola?) and vinegar in with the dry ingredients. Shake shake shake – voila, vinaigrette, sort of. I wonder if they still make that stuff?
Posted by: Amanda C | June 11, 2009 1:46 PM
I still have a secret shameful love of French dressing.
Posted by: VoodooPork ■|:o) | June 11, 2009 1:49 PM
Dark Shadows was broadcast at 4:00 p.m. weekdays, as noted in Wikipedia. That, along with David Selby as Quentin the werewolf, explained its popularity with the after-high-school set, including my older sisters. I thought it was pretty boring at the time.
Posted by: hmpstd | June 11, 2009 1:52 PM
Buffy would have whupped Barnabas before the first commercial.
In those days I recall re-runs of the Wild Wild West had my attention (not much of a fan of horror or soap operas).
Posted by: MrRational | June 11, 2009 1:54 PM
MrRational, Buffy was a twinkle in the eye of some producer back then. It's comparing apples to oranges!
I used to anticipate Dark Shadows as much as I now anticipate Weeds!
WWW reruns are still good, btw.
Posted by: Joyce W. | June 11, 2009 2:00 PM
V-Pork, I have a secret shameful love of Thousand Island dressing. (Though I'm not sure why since it's kind of gross.)
Posted by: Stacy | June 11, 2009 2:00 PM
Shocking confession #2 ...
I sometimes use French dressing as a condiment on a hot dog. Secretly, alone in the dark with the curtains drawn.
Posted by: VoodooPork ■|:o) | June 11, 2009 2:08 PM
They are making a Dark Shadows movie with Johnny Depp.
http://moviesblog.mtv.com/2009/03/19/johnny-depps-dark-shadows-adaptation-very-activewith-tim-burton-directing/
Posted by: Anonymous | June 11, 2009 2:18 PM
"Freddie Cannon had a hit with the WTAI theme song"
Bucky
and that would be Freddie"Boom Boom" Cannon correct!!!!
Posted by: Anonymous | June 11, 2009 2:21 PM
Owl Meat GardenSalad,
Far be it from me to steer a thread back on topic, but let me tell you how they do it in India: Arrange on a large platter whatever greens and tender vegetables were gathered from the earth that morning. These would usually include radishes, red onions, tomatoes, juicy red carrots, and some sort of leafy green I don't know the name of. Sprinkle the whole affair with lemon juice, salt, coarse black pepper, and chopped cilantro. No tossing. No oil (plenty of oil in the curries). Very refreshing with any spicy Indian food.
Posted by: Laura Lee | June 11, 2009 2:28 PM
Red carrots? It sounds like they really know how to eat in India.
I had a salad epiphany in Uruguay. A waiter made a salad like I describe above. That's when I realized that lettuce was delicious and not just background for the other vegetables.
Another epiphany came when I saw a man in Italy eating a plate of tomato slices like they were steak.
Two salad epiphanies.
Posted by: Owl Meat Gravy | June 11, 2009 2:36 PM
Fun with stats time. I haven't seen a head of iceberg lettuce in forever. Much to my surprise iceberg is still number one.
Per capita U.S. lettuce consumption in 2005 (lbs)
Total 34.5
Iceberg 21.2
Romaine 8.2
Leaf 3.4
So who is going to admit that they buy iceberg? Come on, I shared my secret French dressing shame.
Don't the old LIttle Italy restaurants still use iceberg?
Posted by: VoodooPork ■|:o) | June 11, 2009 2:48 PM
What's with you and Hugh Jackman? Don't pick on Wolverine, you'll be sorry
Posted by: ceramic kitty | June 11, 2009 2:51 PM
Amanda C., the stuff with the cruet and packet of seasonings was Good Seasons. It was fairly popular when I was a young pup.
Posted by: Hal Laurent | June 11, 2009 2:53 PM
They still sell Good Seasonings
Good Seasons Salad Dressing Mix Italian Makes 8 oz
Price: $1.69
Size: .7 OZ PKT
INGREDIENTS: Sugar, Salt, Sodium Citrate, Garlic, Onion, Spice, Red Bell Peppers, Carrots, Xanthan Gum, Maltodextrin (from Corn), Parsley Flakes, Natural Flavors, Guar Gum, Citric Acid.
Posted by: cleanup on aisle 9 | June 11, 2009 3:04 PM
I remember Dark Shadows but I didn't watch it. I must have been old enough to have a life when it was on. Or, I was watching Bandstand.
I refer to everything that's not olive oil as salad oil. I think the Wesson bottles read Salad Oil, but who knows?
When I was growing up, we didn't have salad. Neither of my parents - children of the Depression - had salad when they were growing up. They were from the "...and look how well I turned out" school. (Note: There really is no smart response to that one that won't result in a smack in the mouth.)
Posted by: Eve | June 11, 2009 3:07 PM
More on lettuce opium:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lactucarium
Posted by: Owl Meat Greengrocer | June 11, 2009 3:10 PM
I remember oils being more about brand name and not the actual types of oil when I was young. Mazola, Wesson, Crisco. Whatever happened to safflower oil. Wasn't that big once?
Here's a Crisco salad oil commercial from the 70s.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jzd97ID6WhM
It'selling point here is that it mixes better with vinegar. How does that work? Terrifying
Posted by: Owl Meat Gravy | June 11, 2009 3:23 PM
Anonymous - I believe that Freddie Cannon's nickname was "Boom-Boom" but I had forgotten that until you mentioned it.
Posted by: Bucky | June 11, 2009 3:23 PM
Eve, it probalby took me a solid 5 fat lips to figure that out! Slow learner I suppose...
Posted by: NEPA | June 11, 2009 3:33 PM
A salad hewn. I bow in the presence of a master.
Posted by: John McIntyre | June 11, 2009 4:25 PM
Oh my, I think I'm blushing, Professor McIntyre. I'm not worthy.
Posted by: Owl Meat Gravy | June 11, 2009 4:33 PM
I come from a long line of smacks on whatever part of the body could be the quickest reached by the "offended" adult. My mother could get you on the butt with a serving spoon from across the entire kitchen.
On the iceberg lettuce thing, I have to say I always thought I hated iceberg, until I got one of those salads a couple of years ago that were so popular for about a month, consisting of iceberg, bacon and (here we go again) ranch dressing. And, it was Good! Much to my dismay it was very good! Count on bacon to fix anytlhing!
Posted by: Joyce W. | June 11, 2009 4:36 PM
... discovering that wrought is a past tense form or work ... priceless.
Posted by: Owl Meat Gravy | June 11, 2009 4:38 PM
I think iceberg definitely has a place. It's refreshng. It goes well wth spicy Thai food.
Posted by: Owl Meat Gravy | June 11, 2009 4:45 PM
wrought is a past tense form or work
Hmmm...that's why it's called wrought iron, apparently.
Posted by: Bucky | June 11, 2009 4:47 PM
OMG - Thank you for reminding me of one of my favorite Simpsons episodes.
Posted by: gbean | June 11, 2009 4:47 PM
Good idea, Bucky. Wrought, hewn ... I feel like a flagon of mead now.
Posted by: Owl Meat Gravy | June 11, 2009 4:56 PM
That's from the episode called "Lisa the Vegetarian".
Lisa: Dad! Can't you have some other type of party, one where you
don't serve meat?
Homer: All normal people love meat. If I went to a barbeque and there
was no meat, I would say 'Yo Goober! Where's the meat!?'. I'm
trying to impress people here Lisa. You don't win friends with
salad.
The salad song:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S92dHxgZ5Ag
Posted by: Owl Meat Gravy | June 11, 2009 5:08 PM
I've got Wessonality
Posted by: Amanda C | June 11, 2009 6:50 PM
Love the pics, Owl, esp of the veggies
Posted by: Bourbon Girl | June 11, 2009 7:31 PM
My younger sisters were Dark Shadows devotees. My mother's salad (& there was only one) was chopped iceberg, wedged tomato (a square pale pink one - they came in a quartet in a green plastic basket) and Kraft French dressing. Gack! (OTOH, not that my mother ever served it, but I secretly miss Green Goddess)
Posted by: City Redux | June 11, 2009 8:48 PM
The "house" dressing at my house for much of my childhood was called "Russian dressing", but was actually just mayonnaise mixed with ketchup. On iceberg lettuce, of course.
Posted by: Hal Laurent | June 11, 2009 9:35 PM
I remember Dark Shadows. Or rather I remember others around me being into it and me not paying attention.
Judging by the timeframe (apparently I was 13 when the show started and 18 when it finished), it must have been younger siblings of mine that were watching it. Probably my brother Ray.
Posted by: Hal Laurent | June 11, 2009 9:43 PM
Hal!
That was my growing up experience as well. Salad, when we had it, was some iceberg lettuce(and maybe chunks of garden-grown tomatoes) and the dressing. The dressing was mayo and ketchup mixed together.
I think that is the dressing that got me originally hooked on 1000 Island. Kinda the same thing if you mix some sweet relish in.
And Mr. Pork,
I still buy heads of iceberg, I use the leaves in sandwich wraps. But that is when there is no Boston or Bibb lettuce there.
Posted by: PCB Rob | June 11, 2009 9:52 PM
VDP, I like iceberg in sandwiches because it's crunchy, and it's mandatory in my Chaparelli Salad recipe. Mostly I use leaf or romaine.
Wish I'd had a lettuce and tomato salad when I was a kid. My mom's salad consisted of a couple of leaves of iceberg topped with a (canned) peach or pear half, a spoonful of cottage cheese or a cube of cream cheese in the pit, topped with a maraschino cherry. "Dressing" was Miracle Whip mixed with maraschino cherry juice. One-word summary: EWWW!
Posted by: Dottie | June 11, 2009 10:25 PM
My first experience with real salad and how good it could be was my first time at the much-lamented LaShish in Detroit. I was offered a choice of soup or salad, and my friend said, "Try the salad, it isn't iceburg." So I did. After all, this was the man who used sharp and pointy objects around my head.
A plate of romaine with a homemade vinaigrette, some grape tomatoes, onion and minimal other veggie goodness came. It was good.
I fell in love with Lebanese food right there, and it hasn't betrayed me. I might stray, but I always go back to fattoush, raw kibbee, hummus and my other loves.
Posted by: Lissa | June 12, 2009 6:34 AM
Anyone else remember the gelatin "salad" my grandmother used to serve? It was a square of gelatin with shredded carrots and maybe fruit cocktail, served on a leaf of iceberg lettuce and topped with a blop of mayo. Yecch!
Posted by: Dahlink | June 12, 2009 6:51 AM
I love jello and carrot salad.
Posted by: Anonymous | June 12, 2009 7:46 AM
Dahlink - I used to love that jello salad your grandmother used to make. She would invite us all over to finish off what you guys would not eat ; - > !!
Posted by: Trixie | June 12, 2009 10:11 AM
My Uncle (by marriage) was Sicillian and every summer would make the best salad of sliced tomatoes, blanched green beans, shaved red onion, aged balsamic and extra virgin olive oil. It isn't summer for me until I make that salad.
Posted by: kimmer1850 | June 12, 2009 10:41 AM
Carrot Jell-O salad: Boo.
Posted by: Owl Meat Gravy | June 12, 2009 11:27 AM
I still buy iceberg lettuce. Not all the time, but when I have a craving for blue cheese dressing. The crispness and water content of the lettuce contrasts nicely with the flavor and heaviness of the dressing. Blue cheese on romaine just doesn't do it for me. And mesclun seems to light for the dressing.
Posted by: Nicole | June 12, 2009 2:45 PM
Does anybody really like Romaine lettuce? I like the fluffy round green things. Uh oh, lost my words.
Posted by: Owl Meat Gravy | June 12, 2009 2:55 PM
I like romaine lettuce, but the outer leaves. I like the crispy inner leaves.
Posted by: Hal Laurent | June 12, 2009 3:19 PM
The inside leaves are better. The outer ones are bitter.
Posted by: Owl Meat Gravy | June 12, 2009 3:32 PM
I'll eat it if the iceberg is gone and that's all that romaines.:-)
Posted by: RayRay | June 12, 2009 3:52 PM
I've had a grilled romaine salad at a few restaurants and thought it wonderful! The grilling adds a smokey, complex flavor to usually boring romaine. Think Jordan's Steakhouse in Ellicott City has it on the menu.
Posted by: jjk | June 12, 2009 4:05 PM
Dahlink, my mom made the orange jello/shredded carrot salad also; no canned fruit cocktail in it but she did add chopped celery before plopping the blob of Miracle Whip on top.
At grandma's house we got the "upscale" salad which consisted of bitter endive topped with her homemade dressing that contained oil, vinegar, white sugar, chopped up crispy bacon, celery seed, salt & pepper all heated and dumped over the endive. This was not my favorite of grandma's usually good ideas in the kitchen. But then again, if I was lucky enough to have a cold while staying at her house (at the age of 5) I was given a "make-you-feel-better-sleep-all night" dose of whiskey, water, lemon juice and sugar mixed in a shot glass right before bedtime!
Posted by: Lone Lady | June 12, 2009 4:24 PM
Hal & Fl Rob - our salad was iceberg with mayo & ketchup too. A house specialty for when we were having something "fancy" that a salad would go with - like steak (overcooked, unseasoned and broiled to a char, but that's yet another growing up nightmare!)
Posted by: Joyce W. | June 12, 2009 4:37 PM
La Scala in Little Italy has a grilled Caesar salad.
Posted by: Amanda C | June 12, 2009 4:43 PM
Since everybody's joints seem to aching, maybe Jell-O should be back on the menu. People take all these joint supplements like glucosamine/chondroiten. Wouldn't Jell-O cover the same territory?
I've never had a Jello pudding pop, I wonder what they are like? Does anybody make puddng anymore?
Posted by: Owl Meat Gravy | June 12, 2009 4:49 PM
Lone Lady, you lucked out! The only cold remedy I got from my grandmother was Vick's Vap-O-Rub on my chest.
Trixie, there was nothing left--I was forced to eat the stuff (although I finally did succeed in getting the blop of mayo left off mine).
Posted by: Dahlink | June 12, 2009 5:19 PM
Dahlink,
I had the Vicks Vap-o-rub treatment too, and some dabbed under my nose to clear the sinuses.
Joyce,
The only steaks I can remember growing up where of the Salisbury kind. But hey, the parents did the best they could. And I really liked that salad dressing too, until I ventured out on my own.
Speaking of the parents, they are coming down here for a visit, they fly in tomorrow. So I might be a little scarce on the blog. But if I can, I'll do a guest post for EL for Beach Week.
Posted by: PCB Rob | June 12, 2009 10:19 PM
PCB Rob, and somehow we survived. I have read warnings about keeping the Vicks away from the nostrils--all sorts of bad things can happen, evidently.
Enjoy your visitors, and we will look forward to your report.
Posted by: Dahlink | June 13, 2009 8:24 AM
Dahlink, we also rode around in cars without seat belts and rode bicycles without helmets. It's amazing any of us are alive. :-)
Posted by: Hal Laurent | June 13, 2009 9:00 AM
Hal, I think it's because the cars were made of a few tons of galvanized steel. They were like riding around in tanks.
If you don't believe me, look at the Cuban cars now - not a dent on any of them - all American cars from the 60s!
Yep, we did manage to ride bikes without helmets though. No explanation for that one!
Posted by: Joyce W. | June 13, 2009 10:02 AM
Not only did those cars lack seat belts, the had hard steel dashboards...padded dashes didn't come in until...the 70's?
Posted by: Bucky | June 13, 2009 10:24 AM
Bucky, the steel dashboards allowed Plastic Jesus and Magnetic Mary to stick.
Posted by: Hal Laurent | June 13, 2009 11:27 AM
Yes, Hal--and I have the emotional scars to prove it!
Posted by: Dahlink | June 13, 2009 11:29 AM
And American cars had seat belts latches that were perfect for opening beer bottles.
And we rode in the backs of station wagons with the back window down. Cough cough.
In those big American cars they had the huge bench seats and when you went around the corner all the kids would slide to one side.
Posted by: Amanda C | June 13, 2009 1:18 PM
Sigh - I remember riding in a friends station wagon that was like my living room on wheels, Amanda! And all 8-10 kids that were stuffed in there would cough up whatever change we had to "fill" the tank! Those were good days!
Posted by: Joyce W. | June 13, 2009 1:39 PM
I have a very fond memory of the first Ford Mustang to hit Baltimore. We had a family friend who had connections and got the first Mustang in Baltimore, a red convertible.
He showed up at our house, and my twin sister and I, 10 years old at the time, rode all around the neighborhood, on the top of the back seat, top down, like we were movie stars. The Mustang was very, very unique, and did we get attention.
Very cool at the time, but would I ever have let my own kids do that?
H-ll no!
Posted by: Cosmos Girl I>--I | June 13, 2009 5:11 PM
No big cars in my family. We had a VW bug, the worst make-out vehicle ever. But of course, where there's a will, there's a way. That stick shift and emergency brake were no fun to navigate. Ouch.
Posted by: VoodooPork ■|:o) | June 13, 2009 6:20 PM
It's amazing to me in retrospect how exotic the VW bug seemed at the time. We hadn't seen anything like it before.
I remember one night when my friend Tim borrowed his uncle's VW beetle and we all went driving around in it like silly teenagers do. We drove around with the bright lights on all night 'cause we couldn't figure out how to dim them. The American cars we were all used to had foot buttons on the left side for turning the high beams on and off, but the VW had (unknown to us at the time) a switch on the turn signal stalk for that purpose.
Posted by: Hal Laurent | June 13, 2009 7:22 PM
Yes that's how you dimmed the lights. Pull back the signal lever. The heat was another bear. It only worked when you were moving. It was basically the hot air coming off the engine block into vents that scorched your feet. Very basic.
My first car of my own had a manual choke which I thought was very cool.
Posted by: VoodooPork ■|:o) | June 13, 2009 7:55 PM
I think this particular Beetle was old enough that it didn't have a fuel gauge. When you ran out of fuel, you switched a lever to activate the reserve fuel, which gave you another gallon (or maybe less, I don't remember clearly).
It was a bad thing to forget to put the lever back from "reserve" to "normal" when you refilled the tank.
The heat in the early Beetles was pretty bad, but not as bad as the Corvair (another friend of mine had one of them). When we drove around in the Corvair in the winter we had the choice of freezing to death or asphyxiating from the fumes from the heater.
The "gold old days" weren't really that good, they just have a good PR guy.
Posted by: Hal Laurent | June 13, 2009 8:23 PM
My mother always had bugs, until they stopped importing them (then she switched to BMWs).
Not nearly as much fun for making out as my dad's '72 Buick LeSabre, but you are right, VoodooPork, one manages.
Posted by: Lissa | June 13, 2009 11:46 PM
Hal, the "good old days" were good because that's when we were young and before we got the wind knocked out of our sails.
These are the good old days for today's youngsters who, in a few years, will be saying things like "remember how much fun we had on blogs?"
Posted by: Laura Lee | June 14, 2009 8:47 AM
Five of us drove to Lauderdale for Spring Break 1967 in a VW Bug. Only 2 of us could read a map, so, even though we were mostly on interstates we got a longer time out of that back seat.
Posted by: Eve | June 14, 2009 7:47 PM
Well it seems we're back to our salad days (daze). I'm surprised OM didn't reference the text from Cleopatra on her salad days. I don't think they mean something so wonderful, more like reckless and inexperienced. I don't really know that play well.
Posted by: Amanda C | June 14, 2009 7:55 PM
I believe you're talking about Antony and Cleopatra the Shakespeare play.
Posted by: Rev'Ed –|–– | June 14, 2009 11:42 PM
Oooh--now Rev'Ed has a cartouche! Very appropriate. You'll make Loose Canon wish he'd thought of that.
Amanda C, I'm old enough to remember cars before set belts were standard equipment. When it was just my mother driving me in the car, I sat next to her on the big front seat (no bucket seats then either) and whenever she braked, her right arm automatically flew out to keep me from flying into the dash. Unfortunately, we were once rear ended when I was 4, and I did make hard contact, which is probably why I didn't learn to drive until I was 30!
Posted by: Dahlink | June 15, 2009 7:03 AM
Not really my cartouche.
I remember when seat belts were a controversial issue. People argued that they would trap you in a burning car and a sinking one (not a problem for VW bugs.. they float!) And those were just the lap belts. Same argument for shouder ones and automatic ones. Then air bags, same deal.
Posted by: Rev'Ed –|–– | June 15, 2009 7:26 AM
Don't forget stopping short. When people didn't wear seat belts, that outstretched arm move was the go-to move on a date. If you know what I mean.
Posted by: Rev'Ed –|–– | June 15, 2009 7:42 AM
I still automatically throw my right arm out if I have to break hard, if I have a passenger.
This used to really confuse my younger friends in college. They didn't know what a davenport was, either.
Posted by: Lissa | June 15, 2009 8:10 AM
" My mother always had bugs ..."
???????
Posted by: RayRay | June 15, 2009 10:12 AM
My mother always called our VW "that Nazi car of yours". She also hated Budweiser beer because it is made from rice and that made it Japanese. Everything had to be checked to be sure it was made in Japan. Anything plastic or mechanical was suspect.
Posted by: Rev'Ed –|–– | June 15, 2009 11:03 AM
We were driving in the interstate in Indiana a couple of weeks ago and passed a restored 67 Chevelle convertable. Very distinctive; even more so was the woman sitting real close to the guy there being few bucket seats back then.
Posted by: LEC | June 15, 2009 2:26 PM
RayRay, VW Beetle.
Posted by: Lissa | June 15, 2009 2:56 PM
Lissa,
I know. I just thought that line was funny. No harm intended.
Posted by: RayRay | June 15, 2009 3:19 PM
She called 'em bugs. Probably why I grew up to be a geek.
Posted by: Lissa | June 15, 2009 3:36 PM
This may be a dumb question but maybe someone coulod help me out. My friend is always talking about the salad where he works and calls it mecscalin. What is it and isn't that a drug? Thanks
Posted by: randy | June 15, 2009 3:48 PM
Mescaline
Mesclun
Posted by: Joyce W. | June 15, 2009 4:20 PM
Mesclun is usually just mixed greens. Mescaline is a drug.
Totally different, different number of syllables, even.
Posted by: Lissa | June 15, 2009 4:23 PM
So it's like weeds? What's difference between it and wild greens or european greens or field greens? So confusing
Posted by: randy | June 15, 2009 4:26 PM
Joyce, why am I not surprised that it is you and me who knows the difference between greens and drugs off the top of their heads?
Posted by: Lissa | June 15, 2009 4:28 PM
He pronounces it like the drug. I thought maybe there was a mescaline plant. Thanks Joyce and Lissa. Anonymous is lame.
Posted by: randy | June 15, 2009 4:34 PM
randy, servers who say "mescaline" when they mean "mesclun" are one of my very biggest pet peeves. I also get testy when people pronounce "athlete" with three syllables. There is no "uh" in athlete.
Posted by: Dahlink | June 15, 2009 5:07 PM
randy, any time we can help - ignore Anonymous (who could be any of a legion of Anons).
Lissa - how funny is that?
Even funnier that I used the pictures and you used the definitions!
Posted by: Joyce W. | June 15, 2009 7:25 PM
We're a team, Joyce. Unless you want any of my, erm...greens. You'd have to wrassle me for those .
Posted by: Lissa | June 15, 2009 7:59 PM
Okay here is what is truthy about reloading. A hard reload CTRL-R or its variants always does a proper reload on the actual blog page you are one but not always on the Most Recent Comments box. That is a blog problem, not a user cache problem. This blog page is a mess of files, a true cluster problem. It is bloated and inefficient and takes upwards of one minute to post a comment on a very fast connection
Posted by: VoodooPork ■|:o) | June 15, 2009 10:24 PM
That took 1:58 to post.
Posted by: VoodooPork ■|:o) | June 15, 2009 10:26 PM
VDP, Lately, it has been taking "a while" to post from the facilities here at work. At home, on my hand-me-down Mac with Verizon DSL, it takes bloody forever to post and I wind up trying to goose things along and up posting 2 or 3 times.
When I saw the changes to the Sun "Front Pages" this morning - and how long it took them to download - I knew that I would never be accessing The Sun from home.
Posted by: Eve | June 16, 2009 9:25 AM
I used to look at the Sun home page occasionally for general news and O's coverage, but now it takes ten pages on my laptop to look at the home page.
The Sun's web site was always poorly programmed (very slow) and designed (bluh). Now it looks like it's designed for people with serious mental disabilities, the sort of pre-literate trogolodyte easily distracted by shiny objects. What a disaster.
It's ridicuously large and complicated and yet seems to have less information. Now you have to search through layers of garbage to get to the meat.
The blogs have a much much smaller presence. I'll bet that despite being some sort of theme week for the Sun Super Awesome Cool Living section this week's Top Ten will be one of the least viewed ever.. Maybe I'm wrong.
Posted by: VoodooPork ■|:o) | June 16, 2009 11:10 AM
You're wonrg. Ha, just a reflex.
It's dreadful. Someone needs to show me this feeds thing.
Posted by: Amanda C | June 16, 2009 11:21 AM
From all the comments I must be one of the few that really likes the new design, dunno. And, between work and home I probably look at the home page 30 or more times a day, and for a number of years, and it doesn't seem to be loading any slower. The blog comments have always been really slow posting though, so we'll see how long this one takes.
Posted by: Pokey | June 16, 2009 11:21 AM
Never trust a rubber horse named Pokey.
Posted by: Gumby | June 16, 2009 11:33 AM
"Every design has a purpose."
I believe that's from the lost book of Genesis or the second Epistle of Peter the Gabriel.
I don't think they designed it as a place to find news, but rather as a shiny geegaw to visually entertain you for 30 seonds in between watching porn.
It looks horrible and a little frightening on my laptop PC. On my ginormous montor at work it is more appealing.
I think it's a half measure though. Why not have a dancing bear throw pies with headlines at the screen. Now THAT is infotaining.
Posted by: Rev'Ed –|–– | June 16, 2009 1:06 PM
What is going on? I just looked at the new Sun home page and my eyes are bleeding. I thought, why are you guys talking about this under the salad post, then I realized that the Sun site now resembles my mother's salad – an incongruous visual hullabaloo of unnecessary ingredients
blerg
Man there's a lot of pho places in Tucson. That could be the only nice thing I've ever said about this hell hole.
Posted by: Owl Meat Gravy – AWOL | June 16, 2009 1:16 PM
Rev Ed, I suspect they were not listening to Peter Gabriel when they redesigned the page. I'm torn between the Sesame St. disco album and something Disney.
Posted by: Lissa | June 16, 2009 1:31 PM
I'm sensing Fantasia while on X and crack.
Posted by: walt d | June 16, 2009 1:49 PM
■|:o) !
SOme of my best friends are pre-literate troglydites!
Posted by: Eve | June 16, 2009 2:00 PM
Oh, look! Bird found internet access in the Copper State.
Posted by: Eve | June 16, 2009 2:04 PM
I'm thinkin' the Sun webfolks were listening to Barney. Mindless and purple.
Posted by: Eve | June 16, 2009 2:06 PM
Two bits of evidence that Owl Meat Gringo is getting too powerful and needs to be taken down. (I have a secret plan)
1) The Sun is now promoiting its "Suntastic" specials. Where have I heard that before? Perhaps on FUNtastic Thursdays?
2) Lettuce has opiates? Even the Congress has taken notice. See this Congressman rail against smoking lettuce. Really. No, really.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EhsYiQWLAxE
Posted by: Amanda C | June 16, 2009 2:11 PM
I would think that smoking lettuce would change the delicate texture too much.
Smoke salmon, pork, trout, all great. But lettuce is way too fragile to stand up to smoke.
Posted by: Lissa | June 16, 2009 2:35 PM
Maybe I'll smoke me up a bowl of Caesar salad tonight. This is your brain on lettuce.
Posted by: randy | June 16, 2009 2:39 PM
I wouldn't harsh on the local web people, if there are any. This design no doubt came from HQ with no latitude for the local people.
Exactly when are they going to get a decent graphic for the D@L blog? The current one is decrepit. The letters are all blurry. Example:
http://www.baltimoresun.com/entertainment/dining/
Here comes a dust devil, gotta split.
Posted by: Owl Meat GilaMonster | June 16, 2009 4:38 PM
for this visit, I used my favorited link, and didn't navigate through the front page.
Even so, the front used to be just links to blogs, other sections, and ads. No real content.
Posted by: PCB Rob | June 16, 2009 9:35 PM
It's a mess. It's all pointless flash. It's clearly meant for a demo that has no interest in newspapers. It's pandering to an ADD crowd. In the end it's rearranging the deck chairs on the Titanic. Sorry kids
Posted by: VoodooPork ¦|:o) | June 16, 2009 11:31 PM
MTV comes to the Balty Sun. But just like MTV is has little content but lots of noise and distraction. I want my MTV
Posted by: whatever | June 17, 2009 1:12 AM
MTV used to be enjoyable once too. sigh. geezing over the memories.
Posted by: Joyce W. | June 17, 2009 6:06 AM
What fresh hell is this?
Posted by: Dorothy Parker | September 3, 2009 4:21 AM