Does food have a right side up?
It's weird, but Bucky, our macho, rural good-ole-boy regular, has been getting sort of existential and Zen-like lately. Witness the questions at the end of his guest post today. Here's Bucky. EL
Everyone has his or her own little quirk, right? Except for my friend, John Martin Thomas (JMT). He has everybody’s little quirks.
He is, for example, extremely particular about his food. Every aspect of it. He is also very predictable about what he eats. Having breakfast at the course after an early round of golf? He eats huevos rancheros. Every single time. Meeting him at Elw…uh, the steakhouse we go to for dinner? Prime rib. Every single time.
So, last weekend, Paco and I were to meet JMT for Saturday lunch at the bar. I got there and was surprised to see Paco’s car already in the parking lot. (Paco’s quirk: never on time. And the most amazing thing about this quirk: He always has a good excuse. Not “good” in that it’s entertaining, “good” in that it is always a legitimate reason for being a few minutes late. But I digress…) ...
As I walked in, Paco walked out of the kitchen. Huh? And he had a big grin on his face. We each ordered a beer, and flirted with Stacy, the bartender, for a couple of minutes. When she went to wait on somebody else, I asked Paco, “What are you grinning about?”
“Just wait,” he replied, “but don’t order a cheeseburger.”
JMT came in, stopped at the bar to pick up a beer (and flirt with Stacy), then came over to the table. We ordered lunch: Paco, a club sandwich, me an Italian sausage sandwich and JMT had what he always has on Saturday at the bar, a cheeseburger, double pickles, tomato, lettuce and onion.
When we got our lunches, JMT looked at his cheeseburger, which was assembled like this, top to bottom: top of the bun, patty, cheese, pickles, more pickles, onion, tomato, lettuce, bottom of the bun.
Yes, they had assembled his burger and condiments upside down. Paco’s grin was ear-to-ear.
“Hey,” JMT said, loudly, to everyone in particular, “what the hell is this?”
1) Does food even have a right side up or an up side down? If you ordered, say, pumpkin pie and it was served with the dollop of yogurt underneath the crust instead of on the top of the filling, would that bother you? Would you even notice? Would you send it back?
2) Is it “pathetic” (Mrs. Bucky’s word, not mine) for three men who are north of 50 to be flirting with a bartender who graduated from high school in this millennium?