Thanks to Eve and Cosmo Girls for reporting on the service for RtSO--I was just wondering where to begin. Robert may have been single, but he was not without friends (including one special friend who gave one of the readings). I know Robert would have chuckled at seeing his blog name on the program.

When the five of us gathered for MD Canon's tea (served with pimiento cheese and fresh fruit), I realized I was the only one who had met Robert in person. But he was with us, and he will remain a benign presence on this blog.

My very good friend played the organ at the service and her husband sang. Small world for sure for those in the sandbox!

There was no soloist at the service, male or female.

How could I have forgotten to say that Fran - Robert's pastor friend - spoke about his love of food.

Thanks to Cosmo Girl, Eve and Dahlink for their observations, above. And thank you, Eve, especially for the kind words about our Cathedral, which is one of the truly remarkable communities in the city (if things like theological diversity, radical hospitality, genuine inclusiveness, energy, humor and commitment to the needs of Baltimore and especially Baltimore's children are important to you).

When the original call about holding the service came, the guess was "four or five would come." The decision to move the service from the 25 seat chapel to the sanctuary space itself was made late in the process, and there were a few glitches as a result (not enough oil for the candles, sound system not turned on, some extra service leaflets printed, accidentally, from the first draft rather than the edited copy). By my count (and clergy are notorious counters) there were 58 (so, not a bad guess Eve!) present, most of whom came forward to receive the bread and wine of communion -- a "meal" that RtSO was devoted to his entire life. (Loved Eve's reaction to the real wine, instead of grape juice!) The Rev'd Frances Cox, the preacher, and her husband, the Rev'd Edwin Cox, stopped by my office after the interment and we continued the reminiscences for a good long while. We recalled that she and my wife (the Cathedral Canon) participated in both RtSO's parents funerals, both of which were also held on wet "English" days. (RtSO's ashes now rest on the coffin of his mother at Dulaney Valley.) Fran+ had an .mp3 recorder on for the sermon, and we will try to get the sermon posted on the Cathedral website (should be easy). I will let you all know how to find it when its there. RtSO was a devoted music fan (and sometime choir member), and so it was great to have Tish play the organ for the service. And though her husband was not a soloist, his wonderful voice certainly rose above those of us who are less gifted singers.

Finally, a thought about what it's like to meet folks you know, mostly by text and nickname, in person: It seemed to me that we all respected the identities that we present on this blog while completely enjoying this new level of relationship. (I raved about it all afternoon to my colleagues.) A couple of us shared a little more of our "real names," mostly in the context of story-telling, but (as was described in one of the stories) I have already forgotten who went with which name, and will no doubt have forgotten the names themselves within days. So I was especially grateful to Dahlink and Cosmo Girl for wearing cute "nickname tags." (I figured the black suit and white collar would be enough for me, but was surprised to see there was at least one other in the church! That's a testament to what the preacher called "the many threads of a person's life, coming together.")

We did also talk about what it would take to gather a larger group for a little socializing, thinking back to the suggestion of a meal at Ryan's Daughter.

So, EL ... a suggestion. Could you coax someone from the Art or Design Department at the Sun ( ... you do still have folks who do that, don't you?!) come up with a little downloadable "nickname" tag form? We click and print and fill it in appropriately. I would, for example, wear mine to the Bel Air or Waverly Farmers markets -- just to see who asks about it, or to meet other sandboxers. And it would make gathering for such a social event a little easier for us (especially those of us who are introverts).

And finally, finally -- the "funky thing that doesn't leave tea leaves floating in your tea" is a gravity release tea infuser. You can find them at TeaVana (at malls in Annapolis, Towsontown, and Columbia that I know of) and also at other shops (and the Internets) made by Adagio.com and called "IngenuiTea." Recipe for the Pimento Cheese was from an NPR story last fall.

MD Canon, Eve, Cosmos Girl, thank you for bringing this service home to the rest of us.

MD Canon, what was the other music besides "For All the Saints"? Your church sounds nice... radical hospitality?

And I'm sure RtSO will forgive me for asking - what is the pimento cheese recipe? All I know of pimento cheese was from growing up in the South, and it was processed yellow cheese with pimentos in it, spread on white bread, often with the crusts cut off (not that it wasn't pretty good done that way).

If you got your recipe from NPR, it must be a little less prole than that?

I just got home from work, or I would have been on earlier. I had time to send the picture to EL, and that was it.
It was a nice service and "fleshed out" RtSO for us. However, everybody was saying that he really compartmentalized his life, and everyone only saw little parts of him. I am glad that we got to see his humor and caring!
The Cathedral is lovely, with a warm welcoming feel to it, which other Cathedral's seem to be lacking.
I very much enjoyed meeting everyone afterward and sharing tea. (I must go out and find a gravity tea infuser. It works great!)
The idea of name tags is great: I made mine out of a file card, and the rain didn't do it any good at all :-)

MD Canon,
I'll see what I can do for a nametag. I should be able to email it to EL sometime tomorrow morning. That way we might have two to choose from.

Thanks, friends, for giving us a bit of Robert's service. I don't know if I speak for everyone, but it really bothered me that I couldn't attend. In this work enviornment, I find my employer rather inflexible about last minute changes to scheduling (last minute being any that's not a month away). Unfortunately, I'm not in a position where I could go but I really felt terrible about it. I would have liked to say goodbye to someone, although whom I never met, who I considered a friend.

Thanks to everyone for posting info on RtSO's service for those of us who could not make it. The photo of the program cover was a very nice touch.

BG, the pimento cheese is much better than what I remember The Southern Belle (as we used to refer to my mother) making. Less Cheez Whiz-zy. More subtle on the pimento. It seemed to be shredded cheese. It was a very sophisticated version.

BG, we also sang Jesus Christ is Risen Today which is one of my favorites.

How wonderful that his nickname was on the program! It just proves the joy that this community gives to so many. I am with Joyce...I really would have liked to make an appearance, alas the restraints of the job. My thoughts were definitely with RtSO, and thanks to the fellow sandboxers who were there for representing us and letting us know how it was.

Thanks all for the information on the service. I wish I could have been there myself, to say goodbye to a friend.

The pimento cheese that I remember growing up came in little glass jars that could be reused for juice glasses since the lid was a pry-top metal one. The cheese inside was neufchatel (isn't that just a fancy word for cream cheese?) and had pimentos mixed in. Sometimes we had the pineapple version. I'm thinking maybe Kraft made it?

PCB Rob - Exactly my memory, as well. There was one that had bacon in it as well, also a Kraft juice-glass cheese.

Maybe we're related somehow.

I think that neufchatel is lowfat cream cheese.

Wow, Bacon with the cheese?? I wish we had that kind. Maybe we did, I was a kid back then.

Bucky, maybe we are related somehow, but I don't think I have any relatives out West. Now that I think of it, I do, but none are in Colorado.

Thank you to everyone who shared RtSo's memorial service with us. I had planned to attend but became very ill on Sunday night; I felt even worse on Monday when I was too sick to pay my respects to his family and say goodbye to our on-line friend.

YumPo, I hope you are feeling much better today.

The Canon's pimiento cheese was far, far better than what we used to get in those little jars. My mother used to save those jars for juice glasses--anyone else remember that?

Dahlink, not only the pimiento cheese glasses but the jelly glasses too - with yogi the bear on them and then later the Flintstones. We had some fancy drinkin stuff in our house!

Thank you, Dahlink. After visiting the specialist today, I'm feeling better and close to human again.

I remember those little jars/juice glasses! (Plus I'll bet my mother still has a few somewhere in her house.) I wonder if MD Canon's recipe was similar to what I was served in Richmond-- it was so much better than I expected, compared to the stuff in jars.

Sorry to hear you were Moby Dick Lady Yummington. Perhaps you should vary your diet and try a little tea and toast with a smidge of marmalade? You are quite the good sport.

Sorry for being so tardy in posting on the RtSO memorial. My son’s home lost internet service Monday and I have been traveling home to Kentucky today. Thanks to Eve, Darlink, Cosmo Girls and MD Canon for providing the info for everyone. I’ll just add a couple of comments not made by others.

When I arrived at the Cathedral and was introducing myself to the family/ friends standing at the entrance, I was stating I only knew Robert from Dining at Large. One woman who turned out to be his dear friend Dorothy Accosta responded to my identifying my blog name as LEC with the information she was “Book”. It made me think of how personal Robert sometimes presented “Book” as more than just a bound volume. Now I know why, although she stated Robert did have a great fondest for the paper variety as well.

I have not been a follower of organized religion for most of my adult life but I was struck by the appropriateness of the beginning sentence of the service’s first reading which was taken from Isaiah 25:6-9. [He]…will make for all peoples a feast of rich food, a feast of well matured wines, of rich food filled with marrow, of well-matured wines strained clear.

The homily presented by his college friend demonstrated that even back then he possessed all the great qualities that we saw in Robert the Single One.

I never met RtSO and therefore never shared a meal or drink with him. Being able to consume a bit of bread and wine at the communion made me think we had in a sense.

It was enjoyable meeting a few others of the sandbox persuasion; a very diverse group. MD Canon’s hospitality, as previously discussed was exceptional. I am definitely going to get some of those “funky things” for tea drinking friends. His pimento cheese spread was nothing like I remember as a kid. The cheese seemed shredded and besides pimento had other flavorings including something green. I thought olive at first, but the flavor and texture weren’t right for that, maybe chopped capers. I can usually pick out ingredients but I apologize as I am recovering from a sinus infection.

I'm sorry that I could not be there.

As for Pimento cheese, I really didn't grow up with it, but I have really developed a taste for it. I normally pick some up whenever I go to Fresh Market on Greenspring.

Juice glasses remind me of living in Morocco in the '50s (Dad in USAF). The locals loved to use them to drink their tea -- dark, very sweet, and served at approximately 111 degrees (who needs handles?).
I remember RtSO at Camden Yards enjoying enjoying the dogs, and his hosting us (Frances-the-preacher and I) for one of his exquisite dinners.
I also remember one of his many lives when he was doing forensic accounting -- chasing down hidden funds in divorce cases. (Yet another way in which he cared for people.)

How nice to read through these reflections. I wish I could take some credit for the good things that happen at our Cathedral, but the truth is that my wife is the one who works there, so much of what you experienced comes from her labors. Bourbon Girl tagged the key characteristic of this community: Radical Hospitality. (I just wish I could be there more than once or twice a year! My schedule takes me to 45 different congregations a year.)

Pimiento Cheese Recipe: Two half pound blocks of Cabot cheddar cheese (for this batch I used one block of 1% sharp white and one block of regular extra sharp yellow), shredded on a fine grater
+ one 4 oz. jar of pimientos, chopped fine, including juice (Goya, this time)
+ 1/4 cup mayonnaise (Duke's when I can get it, but this batch used Helman's Low Fat)
+ four or five finely chopped cornichons
+ a couple of shakes of garlic powder
+ several fine grinds of white pepper.
Mix gently to preserve some of the shredded cheese texture. Rest at least overnight (I made this batch on Saturday morning for Monday.)

RE: The Service: The other hymns included the "Ode to Joy" from Beethoven (#376 in our Hymnal 1982) and "Jesus Christ is Risen Today" (ibid., #207).

Several folks asked about the absence of Psalm 23. It is certainly an option for Episcopalians, but RtSO's family always eschewed it in favor of Psalm 138. Rereading it this evening, I think it is because of the several references to singing.

Many folks also asked if the Hebrew Scripture lesson was part of the regular service or whether the family had chosen it specially. Answer: Yes (to both -- it is one of the recommended options!). Those of you who weren't there, but who enjoyed Robert's contributions to this blog will appreciate the opening line, from Isaiah 25:6, regardless of any religious affiliation --

"On this mountain the Lord of hosts will make for all peoples a feast of rich food, a feast of well-matured wines, of rich food filled with marrow, of well-matured wines strained clear."

"All peoples." It is my very best favorite image of heaven!

Joyce, we had Howdy Doody on our grape jelly glasses.

chopped cornichons

What in the world are cornichons?

Oh! Book was a real person...

chopped cornichons

What in the world are cornichons?

Eve,
cornichons are a type of pickle or gherkin. I didn't know either, but epicurious.com did.

Lord M, thank you. I like my new title, although I am just a commoner. Does it include a tiara? Tea and toast has been almost all I've been eating since the weekend-- perhaps I just needed some yummy marmalade. You say it has restorative powers, do you?

How wonderful that RtSO's Book was a beloved person! That makes me very happy for a number of reasons.

MD Canon, the recipe sounds delightful. I will have to try it when I have my appetite again, hopefully by this weekend.

After reding all the descriptions of the service, it was a fitting memorial to a good man.

Yet another "jelly glass" delicacy: Dried chipped beef. My grandmother taught me how to make creamed chip beef on toast from this stuff, claiming that you could leave it in the cabinet for years and it would still taste the same.

...claiming that you could leave it in the cabinet for years and it would still taste the same.

MD Canon, is that a good thing or a bad thing?

Why yes Lady Yummington, tiara privilege is certainly granted as part of your title. The choice of style is yours. Whilst innovation in style is not common among the aristocracy, the Duchess of Pork designed this fetching bacon tiara. Just a caution, you wouldn't want to show up at a ball wearing the same tiara.

Why yes Lady Yummington, tiara privilege is certainly granted as part of your title. The choice of style is yours. Whilst innovation in style is not common among the aristocracy, the Duchess of Pork designed this fetching bacon tiara. Just a caution, you wouldn't want to show up at a ball wearing the same tiara.

Why yes Lady Yummington, tiara privilege is certainly granted as part of your title. The choice of style is yours. Whilst innovation in style is not common among the aristocracy, the Duchess of Pork designed this fetching bacon tiara. Just a caution, you wouldn't want to show up at a ball wearing the same tiara.

MD Canon and YP, would it be like twinkies? The food that lasts forever?

My father's recipe (with bacon):

4 strips bacon (cooked on a rack in a 375º oven until crisp)
1/2 lb sharp cheddar
4 oz jar pimentos, drained
about 1/3 cup of good mayo (or to taste)
2-3 tsp horseradish
dash Worcestershire
dash pepper sauce
lots of ground black pepper

Baltofoodie ... bacon and horseradish -- Wow!

RE: chipped beef in the jar: For a woman who started her family in the midst of the Great Depression, that whole "last forever" thing must have been very hopeful.

Baltofoodie, that's a list of ingredients, not a recipe, but I can imagine what you do. The addition of horseradish sounds inspired.

The food that lasts forever?

That would include Peeps too.

Chipped beef is indeed a good thing. It's not pork, YP, but it's still good.

Mind you, I'm talking about real chipped beef, not the stuff in the plastic envelopes at the grocery store. Unfortunately I don't know where to buy it anymore, since the demise many years ago of my favorite meat purveyor at Broadway Market.

Peeps is not food.

Hal, I believe they sell real chipped beef at Mueller's Deli on Harford Road. I'll check for sure next time I am there.

I have two jars of Duke's mayo in the cabinet from my sister in SC. I used to buy it at Safeway, but they no longer carry it. Has anyone else found it in Baltimore?

Mary Roby

Fresh Market sells a pretty good "dried beef."

Hal,
I agree, Peeps are not food.

Also, why the love for Duke's mayo? They sell it everywhere down here. I like the Hellmans made with canola oil much better.

Hal, the meat purveyor (can't remember the name) in the PA Dutch Market in Cockeysville has beautiful thinly sliced dried beef. I bought a lot and froze it in 4 oz. packages to make CCB; used the last one today. Obviously, I have to go get more very soon.

What is in chipped beef besides the chipped beef? Is it just a roux with milk and salt and pepper or are there onions too. I'd like to try to make it from scratch sometime although I have to admit the one in the pouch in the refrigerator area of the grocery store.

Joyce said: What is in chipped beef besides the chipped beef?

Assuming you mean "what's in creamed chipped beef besides the chipped beef, no, onions aren't generally in the sauce. On the other hand, onions are good in almost anything.

What is in chipped beef besides the chipped beef?

Watch out, Joyce...that question comes very close to the whole meatball brouhaha.

Lord M, I am agog, just agog, I tell you, over the Duchess of Pork's tiara. Just how that pretender absconded with that precious item...hussy.

I am shattered, despondent. I need a rasher of bacon.

Isn't creamed chipped beef also affectionately known as "SOS"? I remember seeing it in our grade-school cafeteria. It looked like it was mixed with Elmer's glue -- definitely "rib-sticking" ...(rim shot)

YP,
I think SOS is ground beef rather than chipped beef. But yes, a lot of people use SOS for creamed chipped beef.

Have been away from this thread for a while and now I'm confused. How did we get from RtSO's memorial service to SOS

And what is the dried beef sheets you'll see on the top shelf of the canned meat section at the grocery store. It is usually next to the sardines and corned beef hash. It looks a beef roll-up?

Kitkat - Business as usual, in the Sandbox.

Have been away from this thread for a while and now I'm confused. How did we get from RtSO's memorial service to SOS

Thanks KitKat. I laughed right out loud at that and am still laughing.

No disrespect intended for RtSO for sure, but you know how topics drift/lurch around here.

I bet he's up there reading this and chuckling himself.

RoCK, that is the proper kind of beef for chipped beef. I used to eat it out of the jar as a kid, but it is on the salty side for most folks.

What does SOS stand for?

BG, SOS stands for Sh@t on a Shingle, creamed chipped beef on toast. My father complained about how he had to eat it in the Army in Japan all the time. The reason it has to be chipped or dried very salty thin slices of beef is because that was what would keep in any climate or situation in the Army overseas. Hamburger would have killed them.

And yes, he complained about it but my mother made it for all of us. Given what you know of my mother, that might actually make sense to you.

I'm sure he would appreciate the blog-as-usual digressions.

What does SOS stand for?

Decorum prevents me from saying the whole thing, but the OS part stands for "On a Shingle".