That was mean. To wash the taste out of our mouths, perhaps we could all split one of these.

Damn! I can't read the link from work. What is it?

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! my eyes my eyes!

Stacy, you work somewhere that filters The Straight Dope? Heavens...

Ughhhh! Just when I stopped having nightmares...Springs1 makes a comeback.

Wow - that was obsessive/hilarious.

I don't have a problem with corporate overlords blocking access. Here is a list of sites that will make your browsing anonymous so that your corporate watchdogs won't know that it's you going to youtube or wherever.
http://www.freeproxy.ru/en/free_proxy/cgi-proxy.htm

Let me know if it works.

C'mon y'all, open your minds. Springs1 has provided us hours of entertainment, even when she wasn't around and, for myself, gave me the opportunity to do some of my bets work on this blog.

You just need to approach her with the right attitude.

Don't use the name! Don't use the name! We are all DOOMED!!!!

This could be a good thing. Maybe she's read _Ulysses_.

In fact, maybe SPRINGS1 is channeling James Joyce.

To quote Owl: "this bit of writing breaks the convention of linear writing -- it is meant to be read and micro-re-read leaving one with a multi-dimensional state of chewy ambiguity."

Well, maybe ambiguity isn't the first word one thinks of when it comes to SPRINGS1. Still, she employs that Joycean device where her final sentence always seems to circle back around to the first sentence.

Does anyone else hear Joy's (from My Name is Earl) voice when you read Springs1 comments?

Oh for crying out loud. Seriously though she is a psycho. If you google her (I was SO bored...don't ask) all kinds of things will come up. Including a fake Myspace (amusing) and a thread she posted on a parenting and trying to conceive forum about how waiters are responsible for all overcharges.

The more I read about her, the more I feel sorry for her, and think she needs for serious psychiatric help, or at least some better taste in food. Gack.

Run away...Run away!

For your literary endeavors:

Construct a dialogue between Springs1 and a bartender over the ordering of a martini.

Discuss.

Thanks, it reminded me I want to get the new Flannery O'Connor biography.

OMG, the link doesn't work for me at work-- the Man and his minions have blocked all escape routes.

YP, sorry. I wonder why anonymous server tools have names that clearly state their intention to subvert The Man. They should name it something like freedictionary.com. People do use them to get around the Chinese government thought police. Does anybody have any experience with these? Just curious.

Is it possible to eat too much asparagus? I may have.

I think you should make the bartender slippery pete or stinky pete or whatever pete. Of course pete seems to have just enough DNA to be SPRINGS1's spawn.

I hope someone writes today's installment of D@L dinner theater. I'm stuck on coming up with something for tomorrow's funtastic post. I have ideas but no mojo. Where's my mojo?

Maybe because she came and went while I was in Paraguay I never quite got the anti-appeal of SPRINGS1.. Doesn't she just post a copy of the same screed on different sites, regardless of the relevance?

LL, I see what you're doing.

Bucky --

I went back and read that whole post and I agree with you: you did some of your best work then. Especially the New Orleans bit.

You always make it look so easy.
Like shootin' fish in a boat.

ssh tunnels. The escape route that always works.

Mr. McIntyre, I think martinis are too classy for Springs1. Don't you think she's more of a sex on the beach type?

SPRINGS1 ...

SPRINGS1 ...

SPRINGS1 ...

SPRINGS1 drinks White Russians, possibly with CoffeeMate instead of cream. With a lithium chaser. Or whatever cocktail was popular with Connecticut swingers in 1981 and has now trickled down to her local watering hole.

Sex on the beach is possible.
Slow comfortable screw maybe.
Pina colada.
Tequila sunrise
Fuzzy navel?

In my absence it does seem that SPRINGS1 was the fertilzer from which Bucky sprang. Correlation, meet causality.

Laura Lee - you never fail to amaze me. Do you take notes? Do you have a photographic memory? Are you one day going to publish the annotated D@L?

I bet nobody (ok, maybe hmpstd, but nobody else) understands that comment.

"the annotated D@L"

Wow. Now that would be longer than _Ulysses_.

I've sometimes thought that when one of us (Hal Laurent? Joyce? PCB Rob?) hit the jackpot and became really famous, some biographer or investigative reporter would have to comb through every document of that person's life and thus we could all achieve some measure of immortality through this very blog.

Speaking of publishing, EL have you heard anything from that contest you entered where you had to submit two weeks worth of PRINTED comments? Did you perchance include July 31, 2008?

I just went to Springs1 myspace, and I'm sorry but I can't join in the hate fest. Her myspace plays "Escape" (the Pina Colada song). Anyone who likes a little Rupert Holmes can't be bad.

Also, I noticed from her myspace that she is friends with Tom. I'm also friends with Tom...in fact, like Springs1, Tom is my only friend on myspace. So the friend of my friend is my friend.

Are you one day going to publish the annotated D@L?

I think anyone with a working knowledge of English knows what that means.

Laura Lee, don't you think that Springs1 would have been an excellent guest character in Egil's Saga?

Lissa, having read many sagas I can tell you that she would have been krill food in a matter of moments.

I see Springs1 as a Tennessee Williams charactor. or maybe Albee. Maybe even Faulkner. Maybe even Capote.

I think anyone with a working knowledge of English knows what that means.

Thank you for your vigilance, Owlie. Awkward comment construction on my part; I was referring to the comment LL had made.

Owlie, that was what I meant. They don't suffer fools in the Icelandic sagas, and Egil less than most.

What Would Egil Do? Hint - it probably involves an axe and a lot of blood.

Was that the D@L version of rickrolling?

I rest my case about the literacy level on this blog.