The description reminds me of the old Best retail chain. The one in what used to be Eudowood Shopping Center was the earthquake design with the front wall seemingly all askew.

Kind of hard to top vegan Goth vampire fans...

Should be able to do something with hockey. Say clubbing your own baby seal entrees, hot Vernors, lots of beer and fights between the wait staff.

Pure gold. Thanks for a great start to the day.

Why do I suspect Owlie has been watching too much "True Blood"?

I laughed so hard I think I felt something give.

Granny on the tramp. That's gold Owl Meat, gold!

My friend Mark and I were discussing just such silly ideas one morning over coffee and came up with: The Ranch- Beef Restaurant: you corral your own cow, you kill it, you butcher it, and you cook the cut of your choice and take the rest home with you for your freezer! All you can eat hushpuppies and salad to go with it of course!

Excellent post, Owlie...loved the Tramps and Ribs...

How 'bout:

Barack’s Fine Dining – opening soon, in the space formerly occupied by a Tex-Mex dive. The executive chef says the menu will be a big change from what customers are used to and will satisfy everyone but he’s never run a restaurant before. There will be a cover charge for the restaurant as well as the lounge.

McCain’s Straight Talk Café – serves only leftovers from yesterday’s specials. Most entrées have a decidedly Vietnamese flavor.

The Igloo - All-American cold dessert parlor, serving ice cream, snow cones and shaved ice treats. Interior decorated with pictures of Moscow so you get the experience of seeing Russia from your table. (Entertainment nightly. This week: baton twirlers.)

Biden Culinary School – you can’t actually get anything to eat here, but the proprietor holds classes telling you how to prepare expensive and exotic entrees. No evening classes because the proprietor goes home every night. Warning: tuition is steep!

Lissa -- how could you, a Detroit enthusiast, bring up hockey without any mention of octopus?

Haven't seen True Blood yet. My TV watching time is rather limited these days. Thanks all. I was afraid that I would alienate the vegan goth vampire readers of the Sun.

Believe it or not I found the granny tramp picture after I wrote this.

Could someone explain the octopus throwing thing at Detroit hockey games?

I forgot to put Sarah Palin in there to boost hits. There, Sarah Palin.

Oh, gods, hmpstd, you are right! I'm so embarassed. Erm...go Wings!!!

How about a hockey and hentai themed joint, then?

Good one, Bucky!

hmpstd--octopus??? Please enlighten us.

Go Bucky! Good stuff. I can't deal with politics anymore. My distaste for Sarah Palin and love for Tina Fey is making me very confused. I had a dream the other night [oh no] that I was on a dog sled that Tina Fey was pulling. So confused.

Whoa! and hentai/hockey makes an unlikely appearance on a food blog. Bonus points.

"How about a hockey and hentai themed joint, then?"

In this restaurant, octopus eats YOU!

The octopus is easy. There used to be 8 legs to win the Stanley Cup. Octopi have 8 legs. So, you toss your octopus onto the ice to symbolize that you own all 8 legs.

And because you are drunk, excited and probably male.

My husband would love the Peeps and Chili concept. At EVERY holiday we have to go to the stores to see if they have holiday Peeps.
To me, Peeps are a GACK!

Dahlink -- see this Wikipedia explanation of the octopus tradition at Detroit Red Wings playoff games. As Lissa is from Detroit, I thought it would be appropriate for her to mention it when she brought up the subject of hockey on a food blog. :-)

Thanks, hmpstd--the things I learn on this blog!

Peeps was a cheap shot. I'm surprised that I didn't go for the Hot Pocketeria. Click on my name if you're not already familiar with my obsession with the devil's favorite food.

Lissa wrote: And because you are drunk, excited and probably male. (Emphasis mine.)

Not to get into a "thing" with Lissa like I almost did with PCB Rob, but Mrs. Bucky has a shirt that says, "Red Wings Suck" that she wears to Avalanche games.

OMG...I missed the most useful one the first time through. The Nature Pot. Mrs. Bucky occassionally says, "Let's fondue."

I now have a great answer...thanks.

Sean, in a hentai and hockey themed restaurant, the octopus wouldn't exactly be eating anyone...

Glad you liked the combo, OMG. I'm a bit horrified, myself.

Bucky, back in, oh, I don't know, '97, '98 around there, I was working the reference desk in a public library near Detroit.

Woman came in wearing an Avalanche sweater. We actually considered not answering her question. It was difficult, but our public library conditioning managed to overrule our extreme Wings fanship.

And, we were Red Wings fans there. Don't know why, but hockey is huge among library staff in Detroit. Must be the sensible skates.

I'm all giggly now at the thought of a hockey/hentai joint, Lissa. Thanks!

LOL Bucky. Glad to help.

Lissa, I am elated that such an odd combo would pop up as hentai and hockey and yet completely bewildered by what it could possibly mean. Completely.

Yeah, but "eating" was about as close as I was willing to take it... Plus, actually, in some early Hokusai work (and the work of other contemporaries), which could be seen as hentai precursors, it COULD be said that the octopus was, in fact, "eating" someone... just not in the typical, literal sense. Um... no delicate way to put it.

Lissa - sensible skates. Very funny. I laughed right out loud.

It's clear you are a true hockey fan...you know the difference between a sweater and a jersey. Is there any hockey in Baltimore?

You got me into a mood. I'm playing the Gear Daddies' I Want To Drive The Zamboni right now. In the office. Disrupting work. I told them Lissa made me do it.

Sadly Bucky, no there is no hockey in Baltimore.

They've had several minor league teams, and were great to go watch (they fight more) but it never took hold because we couldn't attract an NHL franchise with the outdated small arena we have.

Supposedly the NHL and NBA like Baltimore because its the largest market without their league's teams.
So hockey fans in Baltimore have to follow the Caps or the Flyers I guess.

Why they have hockey in Florida is beyond me, unless its for the migrants from the north.

And we weren't going to get into it over the Elway thing, I just wanted to let you know (politely I hope) how it looked from Charm City.

Bucky, I'm always glad to disrupt work. Have you ever seen the classic "The Hockey Sweater"?

Sean, you are right, but a discussion of just exactly what would happen at a hockey and hentai joint, while entertaining, would probably get EL, at minimum, in trouble. I doubt this is the kind of thing the Sun was aiming for when they told their staff to go forth and blog.

Rob - you were/are polite. I didn't mean impolite "thing." I guess I was thinking more along the lines of "touched a raw nerve."

I'm dying without Hockey Night in Canada. The Leafs and the Wings were playing tonight. I rarely watch TV, but, dang, I miss hockey on the CBC. The National wasn't bad, either. Or Little Mosque on the Prarie. Or Rick Mercer.

Hmm..this might explain why the kid next door set up my TV for me. I hadn't noticed I hadn't plugged it in.

There's a good riff here on the lines of "The Exodus Cafe" with a menu featuring Manna, quails and bitter water ... and you'll notice I carefully waited till after sundown to bring it up.

I do so love the fact that the Hebrew word manna literally means "what is it?" And G-d said, "Eat this, it's good for you!" And the people said, "G-d, what is it?" (My translation.)

Anyway. The actual worst concept for a restaurant that I've encountered in real life was a Hawaiian themed restaurant in the central Asian nation of Kyrgyzstan. Each table was on a little floating platform in a stagnant artificial lake (which smelled of decomposition and fish), and parties had to be taken to and from their islands by motorboat. Another boat would then come by with a waiter to take your order. If, for any reason, you wanted off the island, you had to wave and flash a lantern and hope one of the staff saw you. So no mid-meal potty breaks. Oh, and the food was awful.

Bucky!

I hear you. Actually, rather than go the "raw nerve" route, I decided to be nice in my response. Especially since you out there in TBRS probably didn't know realize how it was back here. But Mr. Elway will probably never be welcome in Baltimore.

I have to explain myself almost weekly to Browns and Steelers fans about how we got our current team.

sheesh.

Doesn't the 94th Aero Squadron in the College Park area have a small plane crashing through the roof? Its been years since i've been there, but I seem to recall that. Maybe not exactly "crashing" through, but at least placed on top of the roof?

Beav,
Its been quite awhile since I was over that way, but there was a bar (restaurant?) on Eastern Ave. going towards Martins that had a plane on its roof.

PCB Rob, I think it's called "The Landing Deck" (or something similar) and it's very near the Bengies Drive-In entrance.