Warm Salad should always be send back. Nothing gets me more furious than that.

Also, I believe that how much something cost should factor into whether you send it back. Bad steak at Capital Grill = send back. Bad food at Denny's = You take your chances.

Amazing how restaurants may disagree. A steakhouse chain outpost in Annapolis did not want to take back either of a room-temp expensive salad OR soup last week. But at least their ice was clean, because it tasted of the bleach used to cleanse icemakers. They took that back.

I think it's got to be verging on inedible. Or such that eating it offers no pleasure whatsoever.

What I hate is when the food that is on your plate doesn't look the same as it did in the pictures that are in the menu.

But if you try to send back a cheeseburger with a thin patty, wilted lettuce and dinky tomato slices because the picture in the menu had a robust cheeseburger with fresh fixin's and an inch thick burger, forget it. They won't ever do it.

I prefer my steaks rare, which means it should be red throughout and cool in the center. When I get a steak that is barely pink and the center is warm, I have no problem with sending it back.

One thing that we all need to remember is that it is usually not the servers fault that something is not right. I have sent food back because it was not what I ordered and the restaurant corrected it. I was recently out with someone who ordered steak well done. It was charred. She then ordered a sandwich to go. The waitress asked about the steak and said that she would take it off the bill. Needless to say, the waitress got good tips. (The waitress also offered to split the checks before we could even ask.)

That's why ordering steak well done is a bad idea, some think it means charred (which it sort of does).

I hate it when I have to send food back. I really only do it if they get my meal wrong and add something I specifically asked them to leave off, or bring the wrong thing entirely.

I'll be the first to admit that I'm a picky eater and I ask for a lot substitutions or for things to be left off. But I'm also cursed with a sensitive stomach so I know there are certain sauces and such that I can't eat. When they bring it to me anyway, I figure I'd rather send it back than eat it and suffer the consquences.

"(The waitress also offered to split the checks before we could even ask.)"
apparently your cheapness preceeds you.

What's wrong with room-temperature salad?

I hate sending things back because I know it puts the kitchen further in the weeds. I had a meal at restaurant week in which both my husband's and my entrees were overcooked and I *should* have sent them back because it was early (only one other table occupied). BUT, we had waited so damned long for them to overcook the food, I didn't want to have to wait again.

The one time I did send something back is detailed in this blog entry.

Oh, Matt. There are SO many reasons that ordering a steak well done is a bad idea!

You're doing a great service to those of us who eat with finicky friends. I agree that food should never be sent back because "it isn't what I expected", "I don't like it", etc.

I think the only acceptable reasons are: 1) Cooked objectively improperly (raw/overcooked/temperature), 2) Cooked with the wrong/spoiled/stale ingredients, 3) Spite (seeing ex-girlfriend flirting with your waiter, etc.)

I can't think of a time I sent food back when it wasn't an outright mistake (umm...I ordered fish, not chicken).

This probably isn't a good thing, as someone needs to know about major things (steaks ordered rare that come out well, mashed potatoes that have frozen chunks, etc.)

At the Pinnacle Peak Steak House in Scottsdale, AZ, if you order a steak well done, they bring out an old cowboy boot on a plate (then they bring the steak but make no guarantees as to flavor). Used to be way out in the country. Now you can buy a house next door.

I will only send food back if the order was blatantly wrong, but I'll keep the food if I don't like it. I live in fear of eating waiter-spit food , and I also don't want to burden already-overworked staff. If nothing else, my 3 dogs get it.

I sent food back at the Catonsville Gourmet this past weekend. I ordered a St. Mary's salad with romano vinaigrette on the side, and it came with some creamy dressing all over it. I just can;t take creamy dressing, makes me wanna puke. When the salad came out the second time, it had the right dressing, but still wasn't on the side. I sucked it up and ate it anyway, and it was delicious.

My coworkers are horrifically picky eaters. One time at PF Chang's (look, we were in Columbus, OH, OK??) my coworker ordered a spicy seafood dish. I told her "When they say hot, they MEAN IT" but she ordered it anyway. Of course the dish was too hot for her, and she asked for another entree completely, gratis of course. Drove me nuts. THAT IS WHY THE BIG CHILI PEPPER IS THERE- IT IS A HOT DISH!!!!

EL, I enjoy your photo caption above.

Thanks. I hate to penalize a restaurant just because I want a nice photo to go with my entry. :-) EL

ANYTIME the food isnt what you decide the food SHOULD BE you can send it back. This has happened to the wife and I's food MANY MANY times.I ALWAYS send it BACK TO THE KITCHEN to be cooked over until it is cooked the way it SHOULD BE cooked in the first place.The food should be COOKED RIGHT and the bill should be ADDED UP RIGHT.Between the wife and I we have satisfying eating out times.I am in chrage of getting the FOOD RIGHT and she is in charge of getting the BILL RIGHT and we figure out the tip TOGETHER.

Sending food back due to a food allergy declared at order time is acceptable. Beyond that, I'd be too worried I'd get The Sneezer unless the issue was painfully obvious and/or put me in harm's way by eating it.

I hate sending food back, but I'll do it if, for some reason, I *can't* eat whatever it is.
I.E.-
- Spoiled/bad/tastes like it has foreign substance in it (like the aforementioned ice machine bleach)
- "cooked" improperly (warm, wilty salad, still cold in the middle, steak drastically wrong temp, etc)
- Not how I ordered it (usually "without tomatoes" because they will kill me.)

It's totally unacceptable to send the food back just because you don't "like" it (like, subjectively, not like "this is so salty/peppery/garlicky my eyes are watering") I've had people do that before. Usually after they'd eaten half of it... sigh. Though one really cool lady one time said "send me a sandwich and have this wrapped, I hate it but I'll give it to my husband, he'll eat anything."

Also unacceptable- Sending your food back because your mashed potatoes are touching your steak... what the heck?! Am I not just going to take it, move it, and bring it back? If you think you're getting a new one you are delusional.

I'm NEVER quite sure HOW to read APPARENTLY arbitrarily CAPITALIZED words.

dcdiva "I live in fear of eating waiter-spit food" - ok for a minute I thought my GF had taken a moment to reply to this blog. She has the same fear. The only time I've sent food back in recent memory were on the occasion of spoiled crab meat in my cream of crab soup and an uncooked cold center of my crab cake. Hmmm. 2 crab events and the same restaurant, that should tell me something right there! Maybe they are spitting in my food...

Bucky, you're a funny, funny man! (At least, I'm guessing that Springs2 is Bucky in disguise, though it could be any number of other jokesters in the Sandbox.)

I would be horrified to send something back just because I didn't like the taste, or things were touching. I would send it back if it was out and out wrong. I don't like sandwiches on toast, so if they're on toast, I send them back. I don't like pickles with my sandwiches, either, but I can take care of that by myself.

KristinB-

I hope it's someone fooling around. If they're actually multiplying, I quit. :p

No, I think it's OMG ... it has that certain insane "je ne sais quoi ..."

I believe Bourdain has a whole chapter in his first book explaining exactly why you should never ever order a steak well done. Restaurants save the worst cuts of meat for people who don't know enough not to order good beef cooked to death.

KristinB, Two Toed Sloth and Dahlink, didn't "Bucky" start posting at about the same time "Owl Meat Gravy" disappeared? Hmmmmmm...

Well, if Springs2 is OMG, I think that will be, what, five alter egos for OMG.

It's like blogging with Andy Kaufman.

RoCK - only five? I have WAY more than that on my OMG alter ego list.

I read with interest the various opinions about sending food back. I do so fairly often if there is something not quite the way I ordered it. I always make sure that I indicate that I know that it is not the server's fault, do so in a polite way, requesting, not demanding, and with an acknowledgment that I'm aware that this means extra work for them. I then thank them profusely and, on occasion, have called the manager over to let them know how kind and helpful the server has been. The server is usually pleased, the manager happy to know that they have good help and a satisfied customer, and I get food the way I like it.

There have been times that I just didn't much like the food I ordered (of course, this may well be my own fault). In those cases, particularly in an expensive restaurant, I will ask for the manager, explain the situation, request something else assuring him or her that I will be glad to pay for the additional dish. I have never had to do so, but that is strictly up to the manager. There is a vast difference between demanding and requesting. Most owners would prefer to give you food than have you leave unsatisfied. The wholesale price of the food is relatively small compared to what we spend.

We have all seen truly obnoxious people loudly berating a server for food they didn't like or too long a wait, etc. There is no excuse for this. We are certainly entitled to get what we're paying for, but not to do so at the expense of someone else. Having waited more than my share of tables (several eons ago) I want to be respectful of those who are working so hard to make a not-all-that-great living.

Bucky isn't Owl Meat Gravy. I know this for a fact.

I agree with BobUU on food allergies declared at the time of ordering. I have occasionally sent food back for having alcohol in it when I've asked the server to check if there is any (not exactly an allergy, but close enough for police work).

Restaurants have gotten a lot better about dealing with that particular request over the past 20 years or so.

One Tuesday, Elizabeth could do a Top Ten OMG alter-egos, I suspect.

Yes, because of the software I have the advantage of being able to see who, for instance, posted on April 2 and no other day of that month. EL

Durgin Park in Boston used to have a message on their menu -- "Not responsible for anything ordered well done."

We've sent back improperly cooked food [e.g., a well-done tuna entree which even horrified the waitress] and for little extra flourishes -- like the band-aid in the sauerbraten -- but if the fault is ours for ordering something we didn't expect, we suck it up or eat around it. At the West Palm Beach Bonefish I ventured to sample a crab dish -- big mistake. The manager saw that I was eating around it and asked if it there was a problem. When I told him I was a Marylander and the dish wasn't what I anticipated for crab, he offered another entree which I declined. When the bill came, there was no charge for the crab entree. Now that's good business.

OK, I'm seriously trying to follow this OMBuckyChucky thing. Let's see if I got this straight: Chucky is OMG who knows he isn't Bucky. Springs1 MIGHT be Bucky (who might be Chucky when he's not OMG or Lucky or Ducky ...) taking on a shade of the OMG persona or he might be OMG channeling Bucky or Springs2 who could be the persona EL adopts when she JUST WANTS TO SCREAM!!!!
But if there is no OMG because lissa wants LJ to believe she's Regina who's really kate when he doesn't want to be Anonymous, then that means Drew from Greektown is probably Retired in Elkridge who in fact holds down two jobs so she can post more authoritatively on local restaurants because she's sick and tired of RoCK posing as VoR when he/she posts on the REALLY IMPORTANT side issues that have nothing to do with the post at hand.
But then ... that would make me Joyce W.

The last time I sent something back, it was frozen in the middle. We'd been considering using the catering arm of the restaurant for our wedding, but that put us off (in addition to not getting prompt calls back).

Last time I had something cold in the middle, it was an appetizer, the restaurant had changed menus the night before, the place was packed, and we had to be at the theater by 7:45, so I complained, but didn't ask for a replacement. It was removed from the bill.

Mostly, we don't complain, but don't go back. Depending on the restaurant's response to feedback, they might prefer hearing about problems, so they can be fixed.

We had a great dinner at "b" Bistro last night. The first wine we ordered tasted acidic and a little off to us. The owner tried it and did not disagree, so it was taken away. The second wine we ordered was fabulous--one new to us. My nectarine tart for desert came adorned with strawberries, which I am allergic to, so the server replaced it with an unadorned serving--no problem. We agreed with Lady Elizabeth's three-and-a-half stars for the food. The fish special and pasta special were both wonderful, and the roasted beet salad with mache, chevre and walnuts was also delicious. I only wish we had ordered two servings!

I ordered fried clams. The plate arrived with the fried, but without the clams. Seriously. A heaping plate of fried, um, dough. I sent it back.

jl, when you are counting OMG personas, don't forget Chino, Snickers and Margarita.

Personally, I thought Bucky was responsible for Chucky, Ducky, Lucky, etc.

Dahlink...Chucky only. All the other -uckies came crawling out of the sand.

I will send back any order that is not right (cooked wrong, contains something I requested not on, and tastes nasty). I will not send back something that I am trying for the first time that I is just something I didn't like how it tasted. My wife and I were at a diner in Hanover Pa, and she ordered a turkey club that took forever, and I got semi frozen lasagna. The turkey club smelled like tuna, we mentioned it to the waitress and she took a bite and said it was fine, my wife still sent it back and didn't order anything else. Then she took my lasagna, and brought back a bowl of ???. I asked what it was she said it was my lasagna and she cut it up to cook quicker in the microwave.
We got the bill and she only took off 1/2 for my wife's sandwich, she said because it was eaten. Yea by her! The sad part is we used to go all the time because they have great breakfast.

charlie,

The waitress actually took a bite, said it tasted okay and put it back on your wife's plate? Reason enough to send it back, or better yet, paid for what drinks you had and left right then.

Just to look at the other side. I was eating dinner in a small restaurant in Bolgna, Italy. I don 't remember the name but it looked like we were eating dinner in someone's living room.

Anyway, we're on the third course and my friend turns to me and says
" You are going to finish your soup right?" to which I reply that of course, its great but I'm just taking my time.

She said "good because if you don't finish it all, the chef will come out of the kitchen and start to ask you why you didn't finish it, what is wrong, why is it that you don't like his best soup , etc., etc.". I finished it all. The entire meal was wonderful.

Agree with previous question, what's wrong with a room-temp salad? When I compose a salad out of homegrown spinach freshly picked or (especially) tomatos freshly picked, it certainly shouldn't be chilled.

Charlie, the waitress took a bite of the sandwich. That is classic. It reminds me when I was at Gampy's ten years ago and I told the waitress the broccoli was cold. She picked up a piece and said yea it is a little cold. I'll go heat it up for you.

Put me in the crowd that doesn't always want a chilled salad. When a salad comes out quite chilled, you know it was prepared hours (days?) ago and put in the 'fridge.

jl - by that logic, Dahlink & I are the only other people here.

I like my salad cool, but not chilled. I sort of equate room temperature salad with greens just starting to wilt.

Not to sound incredibly glib, but if most people would actually read menus in restaurants, most food wouldn't need to be sent back.

It happens far too often that the guest or customer hasn't read the ingredient list and/or how the dish is prepared and, upon receiving their entree or tasting it, gets upset because "...this is not what I ordered".

Granted there are instances where the server (inputs the wrong item) or the chef (over/undercooks something) might be at fault and, in my opinion, in that situation the issue should be resolved by the restaurant. If the guest has made an error, or simply doesn't "like" what they've ordered, then the responsibility should remain with them.

Once, at a certain diner on Route 40, I ordered french fries, but was given macaroni salad instead. The waitress went to correct the item, but the cook insisted that I return the macaroni salad. I slid the salad onto a side plate and the waitress returned it to the kitchen. I'm sure it went right back into the bulk container!

I am just me and barely so. And the caps thing makes me nauseous. Please stop. I think people who know my work know that I am not affiliated with any of the uckys. Chino was deported for being too guapo and Snickers is still on the lam. Just sad me now.

How do you know you're feeling better? When Ding How delivers food to you. Prettty good duck for delivered food.

I think iceberg lettuce is good ice cold, but its legitimate uses are few and far between these days. Did you know that it was developed (selectively bred) specifically so that it could be shipped on ice by rail from California eastward?

All vegetables come out of the warm soil. A cold salad seems artificial. And coldness dulls certain flavors.

I had a roommate in college who took up half our tiny dorm frig with a bag of oranges. Why would you want to eat a cold orange? If you get it ripe off a tree it will be warm.

Who would have thought that cold salad was a topic of interest.

I'm flattered that anyone thinks I could be ten different people. I think the truth is that when I was away there was a crazy vacuum that just got naturally filled. I haven't even had the energy for Funtastic Thursdays.

I was always thought the salad was to be served at room(cellar) temp and the salad fork should be chilled...

I'm confused by the whole salad temp thing, too. I prefer mine at room temp, but don't much mind if it is a bit cold in places that aren't charging me $10 or more for it. I really don't expect low end places to make my salad fresh for me. Come to think of it, I don't expect the high end places to, either, I just expect them to be a lot better at faking it.

It shouldn't be ice cold, though. Wilted is bad. Rotted is worse (yes, I've gotten rotted lettuce). Iceburg lettuce is inedible.

I don't like getting a choice of salad dressings, either. For some reason, it is a sign of a good restaurant if they have a homemade house dressing they put on every salad. If you run down a list, I'll probably pick blue cheese, but my expectations drop.

A couple of years ago, I was in a restaurant in Port Richey, FL with my family. I ordered a medium-rare steak that came out close to well-done. Well, I can be get-along guy so I decided to eat it anyway. My mother, however, noticed that it was wrong and called a waiter over to show him. He decided to take care of it right away by picking up my fork, harpooning the steak and carrying it back to the kitchen on the end of the fork.

Fortunately, the replacement steak, which was much better, arrived on a new plate. But it's a story I'll have for years to come.

I always thought salad temperature was like steak temperature...it's a matter of taste. I like mine chilly, but I prefer all my fruit and veggies to be on the cooler side if they are raw. Some people like beer warm. I think it's gross but it's a matter of taste, so *shrug* to each his own.

The room-temp salad at that chain steakhouse in Eastport involved Caesar dressing. The kitchen's willingness to ignore rules on proper cold and hot temps was awesome.

I find comfort in reading some of these posts as I had a most unusual experience yesterday that actually prompted me to search for a thread relating to sending food back.

I very rarely send anything back unless there is something really wrong... In this case, at the Z Tejas restaurant in Scottsdale, AZ...I ordered a Jerk Chicken salad...the only thing I ever order there. I absolutely love it and I had my heart set on it.

I went to the restaurant with someone I have only been dating for a few weeks now...

The food arrived and it was not the salad I ordered so I kindly told the staff member/food runner "I'm sorry, I ordered the jerk chicken salad." He was apologetic and rushed it back to the kitchen to be corrected. Then, the waitress who initially took our order came over and made a little scene....She asked what was wrong and I told her they brought out the wrong item but were correcting it...and she began insisting that I had asked for a "Chopped Chicken" salad and not the "Jerk Chicken." I'm very non-confrontational and didn't want to argue with her but did say that I asked for "Jerk Chicken and that was what I always ordered..." She continued to tell me "YOU SAID CHOPPED CHICKEN..." I gave up.

Geez. I didn't even realize that there was anything called "Chopped Chicken" on the menu because I have never ordered anything else....I was already embarassed since I was on a date and this was clearly an akward situation...

I apologized to my date who then dropped the biggest bomb of all by saying.. "I would have just eaten what they brought me. I thought you liked to try new things..." I was absolutely mortified at the thought that he would find me to be some high maintence person that would do this routinely. I felt like I was on Seinfeld....This was a total Seinfeld-esque situation.

I was completely uncomfortable the entire time...the snotty little waitress never came back...my date had to wait to eat his food (which I insisted he not do...but did anyways) and then apparently thought I had done something wrong by sending it back....

Please someone...give me your thoughts...tell me that I am not some horrible high maintenence food wasting person! I can't remember the last time I sent anything back in a restaurant and this one backfired on me horribly!

I contemplated sending something back the other day, until I realized that the entire place was just a complete and total lost cause.

Don't want the Sun to get in trouble, so you can read about it on my blog. Suffice to say, it involved rancid food.

You didn't get the jerk chicken, but you did get the jerk boyfriend. Send him back, too.

On the bright side, don't they have absolutely the best cornbread you've ever eaten in a restaurant?

When I'm in Phoenix, I go make sure I go there once, just for the cornbread.