What the hell happened to the rest of your subjects, that only 5 of us emailed him? I think the loyalty quotient is lacking here.
I definitely think you have a loyalty problem at home. So what if you outed her refrigerator: does that give a daughter the right to abandon her mother in her moment of need?
Maybe the Crab Monsters got her?

Ok. I admit it. I sent Mike a thinly veiled threat. This is all too funny. The power of Elizabeth's minions.

I have to admit, I think of you as Regina...My Enforcer. EL

I feel a little bad (just a little) for causing all this brouhaha by bring up "Attack of the Crab Monsters" in the first place.

As I have said before, we can eat and think at the same time!

Mea culpa. I assumed that the Sandbox would rise up and smite Mr. Sragow. I didn't want to pile on. However, an hour or so ago (after reading this post) I saw the error of my ways and submitted a respectful request of Mr. Sragow. We can but hope.

Seriously, you are a good person. We like you. Only I have the power to summon the forces of evil to do good. And I mostly do it for non-crab related things. We're just not that powerful. And we are not scared of crabs. If it was more monkey-related then maybe. Monkeys are both terrifying and adorable, like my beautiful friend Heather. But that's another story. She's the devil. Because I let her be that. See, no exclamation points. I want to kill Hitler's ghost. See, no exclamation points needed. You got the point. Why doesn't Heather like me? Or maybe she does. Oh, it's so confusing. Ever since I broke up with Maggie after my Bulgarian jaunt, it's all so empty. Nah, it's fine. Or is it? Oh what would Jesus do? Oh crap, he would have terrible dating advice. But I don't even want to go out with Heather. She smokes and that's disgusting and she chews gum and uses artificial sweeteners and eat chicken salad and hard boiled eggs, wears perfume, and has no idea what schadenfreude or onomatopoeia is. Seriously it's so empty here, nah, just kidding. I met a woman today who is a liquor rep for Snow Queen vodka. How awesome is that ... a woman who comes with her own vodka. And who followed my tiny rant that involved chaos, tripthongs, Thomas Hobbes' state of human nature as a war of all against all, and some other crap that surpised even me. I think Snow Queen vodka actually made me smarter for a few minutes or it lends that illusion, which is fine. Huh, and it's from Kazakstan, really?, but it's also organic, oh I'm so confused. No Borat jokes please. And it tasted really good, like the stuff I used to drink chilled in Krakova. So there. Oh my god I would kill for a pizza right now. I had pizza with salmon on it in Iceland. Seriously, thart's a bad idea.. Someone once said that the defintion of being an adult was not doing something just because you could. Oh my god I so seriously want a pizza. Please, I pray to HItler's Ghost to bring me a freakin' pizza (no salmon please). And in 30 minutes of less or it's free. Freeeeeee Credit Report Dot Commmmm........

Oh My God I have Snow Queen voidka psychosis. Exclamation point. I'm thinking of chewing my own arm off, which I'm sure would be underseasoned.

Freeeeeeeeee Credit Report Dot Commmmm......

My Army of Duskness will not be a part of smiting the innocent.

I think Owl Meat Mushroom has been possessed by the Prince of Insufficient Light.

I will admit that I did not e-mail Sragow - for the simple reason that I believe that he, like Sessa and Lindner and probably everyone else at the Sun, pays dutiful heed to D@L, reading it as obsessively as the Sandbox regulars and realizing that it is the most entertaining and educational blog on this website.

Mr. Sragow: Thank you for recognizing the Power of the Sandbox by purchasing the "Crab" movie. Bravo!

Editor Tim: You better give full and due credit to our majesty, EL, in your "Crab" column or the wrath of the Sandbox shall be swift and merciless.

You people crack me up. My co-workers are looking at me funny now.

OMG, SNAP OUT OF IT (virtual slap to the face)! You shouldn't indulge in vodka and funny cigarettes at the same time -- you'll fry synapses...or something. We love you and don't want anything awkward -- scusi, awFUL -- to happen to you.

I think Owl Meat Mushroom has been possessed by the Prince of Insufficient Light

Funny, I was thinking it was the Prince of Insufficient Paragraphs...

Hal Laurent, VoR wrote: "I think Owl Meat Mushroom has been possessed by the Prince of Insufficient Light."

I think he was eating the wrong kind of mushroom.

Piano Rob, the most entertaining and informative blog on baltimoresun.com is Midnight Sun.

Proof: This four-star post on bacon vodka

http://weblogs.baltimoresun.com/entertainment/midnight_sun/blog/2008/04/the_scoop_on_bacon_vodka.html

Well, we showed Editor Tim:

Mr. Sragow just sent me the following:

Robert, may you be the first to know I have completely capitulated before the power of the Sandbox and will save all my comments on crab monsters for Crab Week.
Mike

Victory for the Sandbox.

Mr. Sessa: NOT!

But, I noticed on of your (more lucid) contributors suggested that bacon vodka would make a killer bloody mary. Now, if we combine that with the Batter Blaster pancakes and Bagel-fuls and potato cubes falsely labeled hash browns, we'd have a brunch worthy of serving to someone whom you don't really care for.

Sam: your posters are even more immature than us Sandbox posters, and that is really saying something :-)
It was definitely entertaining, but left some 'lovely' pictures in my mind that I can't get rid of.
I still say that the Sandbox rules!!!

Is this why Sragow was "on assignment" and did not write his column for today's paper?

I just asked him and he said, "Say yes, absolutely." EL

Susan--got that right!

Susan wrote: "...left some 'lovely' pictures in my mind that I can't get rid of.

What has been seen cannot be unseen.

(Is that another Deep Thought Thursday candidate?)

I have picture illustrating this. It is of a cat, so it would be appropriate for the Sandbox. I can email it to our blogmistress if folks want.

"Blogmistress"--now that conjures up a picture of EL as a dominatrix. Grovel!

Bloginatrix - Submit!