Tell-all trifecta: Sheila Dixon, Michaele Salahi and Tiger Woods' girlfriend
Just in time for the holidays! Along with visions of sugarplums, I'm fantasizing about the literary frenzy that will soon hit these three headline-hogging women: Sheila Dixon, Michaele Salahi and Tiger Woods' girlfriend (if she really exists). Any bets on which one will be the first to appear on Oprah and/or write a tell-all?
Dixon, Baltimore's mayor, was convicted today of taking gift cards intended for the city's poor. She also was acquitted on several other charges, but still could lose her office. Working title: "Confessions of a Shopaholic -- the sequel."
Salahi (shown here) is deep in a controversy about whether she and her husband, Tareq, crashed a state dinner thrown by the Obamas. It has raised questions about Secret Service attentiveness, and about the couple's scramble for celebrity status. Working title: "The Woman Who Came to Dinner."
Tiger Woods' girlfriend has been the subject of feverish speculation, much of it triggered by a National Enquirer report that he was having an affair with former New York night club hostess Rachel Uchitel. She denies it; he won't talk about it -- or about his recent traffic accident. (For the record, I hope none of it is true because I admire the guy, and my mom adores him.) Working title: "Swinging with Tiger."
Comments
coming up w titles- what a ball- for Sheila:
The Mayor of Fastersnitch; The Big Shopper of Horrors, The Shoes of the Grifter- a Jimmy Choo Mystery; Persuasion- a rewrite of Austen by Armani; the Planet Doracon- by Arnold Whiner
for the Salahi's: Fantasy Island- my tale of survival; The Whines of Virginia- by Desiree Social; Going Bogus- by Sarah Smiley
for Tiger: The Marriage Sand Trap- by Hogan, Mulligan Stews-Julia Fairway, Arnold Pallmer's Celebrity Tourniquets, 9 Iron to Tire Iron, by Ralph Escalade
Posted by: david eberhardt | December 2, 2009 9:27 AM
c'mon yall- isn't anybody else gonna venture some titles?
throwing this stuff in front of me is like gift cards before sheela
more for Mayor D: A Christmas Encyclopedia of Shoes- Manolo Blotnik
Sheela's Choice- W, Styrofoam
The Gold Card- Edgar A Poetry
for Tiger- The Golfer's Ultimate Cell Phone- by Kate Verizon
Hook Shots for Hookers- by the Manhatten Madam
Posted by: david eberhardt | December 4, 2009 8:41 AM
It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out why he’s not granting interviews to police. They’d have to admit she freaked out, used her cat claws on him, he bolted out with her in pursuit with a golf club, and smashing the rear windows out. With that admission, the lovely Elin would be arrested for domestic violence no matter what objections Tiger had. He’d lose control, and that’s just unacceptable to him.
Posted by: Watch Up in the Air | December 15, 2009 12:17 PM